


Finis

by Saitaina



Category: Magic Kaitou, Meitantei Conan | Detective Conan | Case Closed
Genre: Alternate Universe, Blood, Character Death, Ghosts, Gore, Graphic Violence, Het and Slash, Heterosexual Sex, Insanity, Magic, Male Homosexuality, Male-Female Friendship, Multi, Murder, Nightmares, Non-Consensual Drug Use, Poison, Sexual Violence, Supernatural Elements, Threesome - F/M/M, Torture, Underage Sex, Vampires
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2012-03-12
Updated: 2012-03-14
Packaged: 2017-11-01 21:13:26
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death, Underage
Chapters: 26
Words: 64,241
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/361312
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Saitaina/pseuds/Saitaina
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>An exploration of death through a detective's eyes. A series of one (or more) shots focused on Hakuba Saguru.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Diamond's Promanade

**Diamond's Promenade**

_I believe that imagination is stronger than knowledge - myth is more potent than history - dreams are more powerful than facts - hope always triumphs over experience - laughter is the cure for grief - love is stronger than death.  
-Robert Fulghum_ **  
**

He skated slowly backwards, turning in a graceful spiral as he focused on the ice in front of him, unseeing. The cold wind whipped past him, blurring the scene as it blew his tears back towards his eyes, forcing him to blink.

He altered his turn, now going forward, retracing his previous marks in the ice as he pushed himself across, the silence around him broken only by the blades slicing the slick surface. He held out his arms, balancing himself as he made yet another turn, carving another spiral behind him, picking up speed. He felt his skates leave the ice and drew his arms and legs in, twisting gracefully in the air.

"And just _why_ would I want to learn to skate?" Kaito asked, peering across the ice before looking back at the blond detective standing next to him.

"Because you can't and I can and it makes me feel superior to teach you." Hakuba said honestly, before stepping onto the mirror-smooth surface, pushing himself backwards across the ice, smirking at the thief still standing on the sidelines. "Don't tell me you're scared."

"Of course not," Kaito scoffed, taking a shaky step onto the ice before him and promptly falling face first, chin making a sick cracking sound. He glared at the laughing blond, pushing himself up to his knees, sticking out his tongue to make sure he hadn't bitten through it before pushing himself slowly, carefully to his feet.

There was a small shower of shaved ice as Hakuba skated up to his side, smiling at him. "Give me your hand," he whispered,and Kaito looked up at him before offering his own gloved hand. Hakuba took it and pulled Kaito easily around him, wrapping an arm around the smaller boy's waist, pushing forward. Kaito yelped as he slid backward, body stiff, causing Hakuba to clack his tongue chidingly. "Relax, Kuroba." he said softly, twisting them around so that he was now skating backwards, making it easier on the beginner. "I won't let you fall."

Kaito looked up into Hakuba's golden eyes, his body melting into a more relaxed posture as the pair flowed across the ice, the detective easily holding the other teen up as they moved, until Kaito was sure enough in his steps to slide with the detective.

"That's it," Hakuba said, turning them again, using his leading feet to teach Kaito how to move backwards. "Easy as counting," he said with a laugh.

He landed easily from the jump and twisted, spiraling back towards the start before starting across the ice again, his mind drifting as his feet performed familiar steps across the ice, ignoring the grooves from his previous maneuvers. To him they were nothing more than ghosts on the ice, following along with him in a mirrored procession.

He pushed his leg out, balance coming to him easily as he slid across the ice, feeling colder as the wind entered through the bottom of his jacket, sliding along his body like a lover, stealing the precious warmth he had gathered under the wool. He closed his eyes, lowering his leg, turning slowly on the edges of his blades, trying to keep from thinking, from feeling. Blank was nice. Blank kept you sane.

"GET BACK HERE, KID!" Nakamori yelled, teeth clenched tightly around the cigarette in his mouth.

Kaitou Kid smiled at them over his shoulder, tossing a handful of roses that promptly exploded upon impact with the cement of the roof, leaking a gooey gel. Several officers went down while Nakamori and Saguru detoured around the mess, far tooused to the thief's antics to fall for such an easy trick. "Good evening, gentlemen!" he called over the glider snapping into place as he jumped off the roof, laughing as the wind carried him off into the wind.

Saguru slid to a stop a few inches from the edge, pinwheeling for a moment, eyes trained on the white spot that was the vanishing thief. He slid his pocket watch from his jacket and clicked it open, studying the face before looking up at the clouds that were starting to shift their position. He glanced back at the thief, smiling as the figure tumbled for a moment in the air, before turning for a landing. "He's heading to the park, sir."

"Good," Nakamori said before snapping the location into the radio he held, heading for the access door, intent on capturing the thief who had once more been outsmartedby nature itself.

They arrived at the park shortly after seeing Kid land, and the Task Force spilled from their cars before the drivers had even stopped, all eager for the capture of the thief that sometimes haunted their nightmares.

"Head towards the pond!" Saguru yelled as he climbed out, pulling his coat tighter around him. "He went down towards there, be careful of the ice!" He winced as his words came too late, three officers going down, sliding on their stomachsacross the frozen pond.

"So glad you could join me, gentlemen. Shall we have a skating party?" The cool, smooth tones of Kid's voice came out of the shadows and a figure came gliding past backwards, cape billowing around him.

"Kid..." Nakamori growled, chasing after the skating figure. He was confused as to the Kid's ability to ice skate, when it was a well-know fact that the thief couldn't, and he looked around for anything that might give away Kid's actual position, sure that this was an accomplice.

Saguru slid after the thief, bitter about the soles of his dress shoes being unable to provide proper traction on the ice, and even more bitter to have his teachings thrown in his face in such a manner, although frankly he should have expected it.

He managed to gain some ground on the thief by simply sliding, using his traction-less shoes as skates, the thief having a bit of trouble as the frozen pond grew uneven. He knew he had to end this chase soon. It was growing darker, too dark to really see, the moon and park lights hidden from view by the tall trees surrounding them. As it was he could barely see Kid in front of him.

It was dangerous to be this far out on the pond. The ice was weak, the water underneath flowing out into the manmade waterfall that emptied into a 'river' that flowed back around the park. It was supposed to be a beautiful and serene feature, but in this darkness, not knowing where the edges were, the sound of the rushing, swollen river was terror inducing. Saguru felt as if he would tumble over into it at any moment.

He slid faster, watching as Kid turned to look at him. The thief smiled, giving a wave and raising the small control that would activate his hang glider. Saguru let out a breath, turning slightly, skidding to a stop as he watched the thief, relaxing a bit at the fact that he may not catch the man tonight, but at least they would be safe.

Kid depressed the button on the glider control just as the ice gave way to water about to crash over the edge of the waterfall. He turned again, intending to jump at the last moment; skates weighing him down slightly as the water shoved him hard, pushing him closer to the edge.

Saguru watched in horror as the thief's skate caught on a jutting piece of wood, tripping the thief. He screamed Kid's name as the thief fell, pushing himself to move closer to the edge as Kid's white clad body tumbled into the air.

"KAITO!" he screamed, voice cracking, watching the falling boy just as the teen slammed into the river below. He felt arms wrap around his waist as he himself almost went tumbling over the edge, and he was left, dangling slightly, staring at the blood stained rocks below.

Saguru turned on the ice, blinking again as more hot tears stained his face. He drew his legs in and together, slowing his pace as he glided back to the center of the pond, sniffling slightly. He opened his eyes and stared blankly across the frozen water, watching the darkness before him. He swallowed thickly, tears coating his throat as he pushed off again, skating towards the darkness.

He could hear whispering beside him, the rustle of leaves on the snowy banks that he couldn't see, the rushing of a distant, swollen river, and a teen boy's laughter. Warm arms embraced him, sliding easily around his waist, holding tightly to his hand.


	2. Hemlock

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Obsession is a dangerous thing for a detective.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Abuse of things that should not be abused (prescription drugs)

-  
 **  
Hemlock**

" _It is very important not to mistake hemlock for parsley, but to believe or not believe in God is not important at all"  
-Denis Diderot_

It had started as such a simple matter. The pills were resting on his desk, waiting for him to take before retiring to bed that evening. They slid easily under the knife, and fell apart gently with each turn of the marble pestle. The fine pale beige powder that resulted was easily blended into the melted chocolate in the double boiler, disappearing under the silken liquid.

It was so, so simple. Just a taste and the night's activities were averted. The thief was at home; drugged with pain pills, unable to make his planned heist and Saguru got a night off, a chance to relax.

But simple things soon become complicated. If it worked one night, why not another? Another night to rest and relax instead of running and jumping after a laughing maniac.

And if the druggedchocolate worked for a rest...could it not also work for a chance to _finally_ capture the elusivephantom? There were too many risks now. Too many others all out to seize his prize, his obsession.

So, he had an idea. Then the idea became a plan, a plan that needed research. So he researched, spending long hours and sleepless nights in his library, sneezing as he read dusty old books and scouring the internet for the answers to his questions.

Once he had the answers, he formulated a new plan. One that took in the information and revised the fine details. He had discovered balance, that perfect, golden line between alive and dead. He used that line in his chocolates, carefully edging it, keeping just _this_ side of it with each bar of rich, bitter sweet darkness.

With every piece the thief accepted from him, he could see the effects, study the results and refine his method and recipe. Too much milk one day, not enough powder the next. He was finding the task rewarding, feeling empowered with every move he made. It was incredible, to control something. To watch the results of HIS creation before him.

And he could feel himself being drawn even closer to his subject, sure now he had made the right decision. This was his. The thief was his. And no one else had the same control or power as he did.

He was at a crossroads now. The fine golden line was wavering with each light step he took down the length of it. One false move and he could cross it completely with no hope of return. Did he take that step? Or did he back away and walk on the safety of the edge?

He crossed the line.

This batch was perfect. Just the right blend of chocolate and powder. A recipe guaranteed to solve all the problems.

The thief smiled as he accepted the thick bar of homemade chocolate, barely pausing in thanks before eagerly digging in. He leaned back against the tree he had been resting against, staring up at the stars as he took a bite of the chocolate. He gave a happy, contented sigh, chewing slowly on the sweet, savoring every morsel as the sky above them shifted and changed from minute to minute.

Saguru sat next to the thief, watching him instead of the sky, taking in each detail in the thief that shifted. The happiness, the silence as the thief thought. The slow blinking of his eyes as the drugs started to kick in. Each detail fascinated him.

And as the chocolate bar was finished, he offered his lap for the thief to rest his head in, smiling as it was accepted. He brushed his fingers through the unruly brown strands, watching those deep blue eyes as they grew unfocused, each minute the lids getting heavier and heavier until they were finally closed.

He continued brushing his fingers through the silken strands, finally turning his attention up to the stars, watching them twinkle like small diamonds. The night was silent, with only their mixed breaths making a sound. He listened to the rhythmic noise, following each one, until they started to slow.

His attention shifting, he looked back down at the boy in his lap, watching the ripple of his pant leg beneath the thief's lips, each stir growing further and further apart, until finally it stopped completely. His hand slid down from the boy's hair, over his cheek to rest lightly on his neck, feeling the last few heart beats press against his finger before no more remained.

And as the silence of the night expanded to cover the missing breaths, he bent, pressing a soft kiss to the soft skin of the thief's cheek. He returned to watching the stars, ignoring the body in his lap except to occasionally to pet its hair, waiting for the sunrise.


	3. Penetration

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> A gem can be not only a jewel, but, but something prized. It can even be human.

**Penetration**

" _Save a thief from the gallows and he will cut your throat. **"**_

_-French Proverb_

He leaned over, smiling as the Adam's apple beneath him quivered, the blond below him swallowing thickly. Tracing his tounge over that long, pale column of neck offered to him, he bit down on the curve of Saguru's collar bone, causing the blond beneath him to groan, arching slightly.

Satisfied with the reaction he received, he sat up and leaned over to the small table next to him. He started humming as he examined the toys on display, before selecting one, licking the tip. The cold, bitter taste of the metal excited his taste buds and he shifted back over his companion, still straddling the bare waist as he studied his canvas.

He drew the tip of the knife lightly down the center of Saguru's chest, watching as the skin bended but refused to yield. He licked his lips as he turned the blade from it's path, circling lightly across Saguru's upper abdomen, before putting more pressure on the blade, watching the thin crimson lines starting to form behind it.

Saguru groaned, arching into the blade, forcing the tip deeper with his actions. The blond's mouth opened, tounge darting out to wet his lips as he stared up at the man straddling him, a small, soft pant escaping his lips.

The man smiled and leaned down, kissing Saguru, capturing that open mouth eagerly, tounge thrusting inside even as the knife slid deeper again, drawing more blood.

As they paused for air, the man sat back, lifting the blade, licking it again, gathering the bitter red drops on his tounge. He moved the knife to the side before he leaned down, kissing the blond again, this kiss fierce, demanding as the taste of Saguru's blood was shared between them. The man on top groaned, pushing his hips down against the enticing creature beneath him, one hand fisting on a shoulder, almost clawing at it as their tounge caressed one another, drowning.

Panting, the man pulled back again, causing Saguru to whimper and look up at him, pleadingly. The man smiled softly, brushing his hand through the blond bangs falling forward. He turned his attention to the red stained chest, humming again as he selected a pale patch, drawing the tip of the knife around Saguru's nipple, smiling as the body beneath his shuddered. Red lips wrapped around the nub, drawing it into his mouth, sucking softly as the tounge lapped at the blood and skin.

When the wound stopped flowing, he moved back, drawing the knife up again, slicing a long line down from the circle, scooting back as he drew the line down across Saguru's stomach, watching the muscles under the skin quiver and tighten.

Saguru was gasping, hands fisting the sheets, body taunt, pain and pleasure mixing into a heady drug. The man licked up the deep slice, before resting on Saguru's chest, studying the blond's face. He raised a blood stained hand, turning that face towards him, leaving a smear of red on Saguru's cheek. He stared into those beautiful eyes before smiling and licking the stain his hand had left on such a pure, virginal piece of skin.

He shifted off of the teen, laying next to him, studying the nude body on display, smiling as he absently drew the knife around the skin in aimless spirals, putting enough pressure on the handle to leave fain red lines.

Saguru twitched with each twist and turn of the knife, the cuts feeling soft, feathery. He made light gasping sounds, each time the knife dipped over his hips, trying to push up, to get more. The man laying next to him tisked at the action and lifted the knife each time, keeping from giving Saguru what he wanted. Saguru whimpered in response, as close to begging as he was ready to get. The man ignored him, sitting up and cleaning the blade with his tounge before placing it back on the table. His hand hovered in indecision before selecting another, this time a knife with a finer blade.

He laid back down, though propped his head up on his hand as he leaned over, searching for a new patch of skin. Low on Saguru's abdomen, just barely above his hips, the man started to work, drawing on the flesh as Saguru moaned and writhed with each fine cut.

Finished with his picture, the man looked back at Saguru and smiled, leaning up as he licked the tears flowing down the blond's cheek. Taking pity on the poor teen, he reached down, stroking him as he lapped at the deeper wounds, still welling with fresh blood.

The blond moaned deeply, thrusting into the hand around him, desperate and needy. It caused the man to chuckle, enjoying watching the cool and confident detective so broken. As he continued his pleasure, he leaned back across the blond, grabbing one of the scalpels that glinted in the low light. He slowed the movements of his hand as he rested his head against the blond's chest, listening for the frantic thumping of Saguru's heart.

Saguru whined in protest, trying to get the man back to the pace he had been enjoying before arching, gasping as the scalpel bit into his flesh. Though of pace and need were gone, and Saguru was simply a being, desperate with the surges of pleasure and pain flowing through his body. He let the man do as he please, simply enjoying it, riding the waves.

The man smiled fondly as Saguru gave in completely, and he rewarded the blond with a return to the previous pace, focusing more on the scalpel that was drawing across Saguru's chest, framing either side of the heart beating under muscle and flesh. A heart for a heart.

Saguru cried out as he came, body arching up, forcing the scalpel deep into his body. Panting harshly, he collapsed against the bed, eyes shut tightly, trying to relax when he just wanted to explode all over again. He weakly raised an arm, caressing his hand down the man's face, before threading it in thick, brunette strands and drawing the man in, kissing him softly, weakly.

Losing himself into the kiss he ignored the man shifting, the movement of the bed as the man moved half over Saguru, pressing more into the kiss. Saguru gasped, blood tainting their kiss as a knife slid deep into his chest.

The man pulled away, licking blood from his lips as he pressed the knife deeper, watching the golden light fade for Saguru's eyes. He smiled softly, brushing a hand over the detective's lips, wiping away the mess of blood before kissing those slack lips softly.

He then sat back on his heels, selecting a fresh scalpel and cutting into Saguru's side, removing a small, red gem from the wound. He carefully toweled it free of blood and tissue, before placing it in a plastic bag, securing it in his inner jacket pocket.

With a final kiss to the blond he slid off the bed, standing and grabbing the top hat resting on the dresser. "Good night, my sweet Pandora," Kid whispered to the body in the bed, turning and heading for the door, moonlight illuminating his blood stained white suit.


	4. Lamenation

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The process of grief is different for everyone, even if no one understands that.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Mentions of a m/m/f relationship

**Lamentation**

_It's so curious: one can resist tears and 'behave' very well in the hardest hours of grief. But then someone makes you a friendly sign behind a window, or one notices that a flower that was in bud only yesterday has suddenly blossomed, or a letter slips from a drawer... and everything collapses._

_-Colette_

He never cried.

He hadn't since he was five and attended his first funeral, singing 'Silent Night' to the old lady in the coffin who was 'asleep'.

He had been to many funerals since then, relatives, friends, victims of his cases. He couldn't the number of funerals he had attended since he was five, but he knew that it would require more then both of his hands to complete the count.

And still, he never cried.

But it wasn't just that he never cried. He didn't grieve at all. Not in the traditional sense at least. He knew sadness, after all, someone you once knew was gone forever. That was always saddening. But the traditional process of grief and loss was gone to him. He didn't understand why others wailed and sobbed, he didn't understand the anger at a passing. The denial, the helplessness.

All he had ever known was simple acceptance. Everything changed, everything moved on. No one can change that and it was pointless to wonder, to fantasize, to rage, to cry.

He could remember when the call came. He had been at home, watching with Aoko as the heist played out on the television. A stupid cold had kept him from the scene and instead he had to watch it all live, through a television.

They had heard the shots, but since the white speck was floating away in what seemed to be peace, they brushed it off. Kaito would be home soon and it wouldn't matter. Aoko had turned off the television and went down to the kitchen to get them both refills on tea when the phone rang.

He could still hear her screams if the house was silent enough.

He held her as she sobbed, tried to calm her down as she stood on the couch, screaming. But for him, he felt nothing but the smallest regret that Kaito wouldn't be home to enjoy the chocolate he and Aoko had made.

He remembered watching, as people moved towards the incense bowl, the ritual as routine as saying prayers over an open grave. Even across the world, the process of death was familiar and normal. And just as familiar as the movements, so was the familiarity of the sadness in the eyes of those around him.

He turned and left the temple, climbing into the taxi waiting for him, not bothering to wait for Aoko. He wasn't needed here.

" _Why don't you cry?"_

She had asked the words suddenly, raising her tear stained, blotched face to his. She was packing boxes, sealing Kaito's and her things away to be moved the next day. He never asked, and she never gave a reason, but they both knew that without their third there wasn't anything for them in this house. Kaito had been their glue, and as much as they loved each other, they couldn't go on this way.

" _You never cried...would you have cried for me? Did you ever really love us?"_

He wondered, latter, as he sat watching the bubbles in his beer slowly rise to the surface of the glass, how she could ask him that. How could she combine love with grief? That not having one meant the other didn't exist.

He didn't answer her and she didn't ask again. She simply walked away, clutching the last box to her chest.

He drained his beer and shut off the lights, heading up the stairs to his cold, empty bed. Kicking off his slippers he climbed beneath the sheets, turning into the middle of the bed where a thief used to sleep, his hand curling over the pillow where a small girl used to lay.

And still, he didn't cry.

He was laying in his bed, watching his life bleed away with every beep of the machine next to him. He had asked them, several times if they could just turn the damn sensor off, but apparently, they wanted to know each an every beat of his heart, even if they knew that there was nothing to help him.

Anything would have been better then the slow insanity of listening to the fading beeps. He was sure they could tell when he was dead without it but apparently you weren't supposed to be sane while dying.

Turning back to the book in his hands, he shifted to a more comfortable position, only to be distracted by the door to his room opening. Aoko stood there, gnarled hands holding a cane that she was leaning heavily on.

She took a few, halting steps, before a smaller, smoother hand grabbed hers. A small girl looked up at her then at Saguru in the bed. The little girl smiled and helped Aoko walk across the room to the chair next to the bed. Once Aoko was seated, the small girl climbed up onto the bed and pulled a colouring book from her backpack, starting to work intently on a picture.

Saguru watched the girl for a moment before looking back at his book, dog-earing the page before setting it aside. He slipped off his glasses and rested them on top of the book, finally looking up at the aged woman sitting next to him. He reached out and gently took her hand, placing a kiss on the back of it.

"Welcome, Aoko." he whispered and the woman smiled, giving his hand a weak squeeze.

"This is my grand-daughter, Katorina." Aoko said, gesturing with the hand still holding the cane to the girl who smiled and waved at Saguru. "We would have come sooner but...it's a long flight from Japan."

"I'm glad you came at all," Saguru said honestly, giving her hand a squeeze back. "It means a lot to me, to see you one last time."

Aoko gave a sad smile, releasing his hand to reach up, brushing her fingers through the white strands of hair that fell limply around Saguru's face. "So many years passed...and here we are again." she said softly, allowing her fingers to slide down his face to his cheek. "I wonder what he would say."

"Probably rant at us for allowing ourself to just lay around," Saguru said knowledgeably. "And then drag us off into some hair-brained plan that would leave us covered in something neon painted and smelling of roses."

Aoko laughed loudly, a surprised sounding laugh that made Saguru smiled. He scooted over before patting the bed next to him. Aoko looked at him for a moment before lifting some of the tubing and wires that connected him to the machines around the bed. She gingerly climbed into the large four poster, curling slightly, turning her body in to his.

He wrapped an arm not connected to anything around her, holding her close. For a moment, he felt eighteen again, holding his lover as he waited for their third to return home, almost hearing the running footsteps on the stairs that indicated they were about to be joined by a thief who jumped on them.

But there were not footsteps, and he was a long way from eighteen.

"Will you cry for me?" he asked softly, looking down at the salted brown hair that still looked chestnut to him, even now.

"Yes," she answered, tilting her head up to look at him.

"Why?"

"Because I have to. If I don't I'll go insane. I will cry for you, as I did when we were eighteen."

"Don't," he said, and his voice was weak. She sat up, watching his eyes as they grew un-focused, staring at some part of the wall, at something she couldn't see.

"Don't...cry." he whispered, reaching a trembling hand to her face, touching it gently. She placed her hand over his, watching intently as a tear wound it's way down Saguru's cheek. "For me."

A loud, long beep filled the air and the girl turned, watching her grandmother brush tears away from the old man's face. She closed her colouring book and hopped off the bed, studying the machine making the annoying noise before hitting the button marked 'silence'.

She returned to the side of the bed, staring at the man who was simply staring at the ceiling before looking at her grandmother. "He cried," she said and her grandmother nodded. "Does he always cry?"

"No," Aoko said and put a hand to her mouth before she could released the choking sob in her throat.

"Oh...I'm going out to play." And with that she ran out of the room, pigtails bouncing merrily as she skipped down the steps, informing the nurses below of the machine making noise.


	5. Prevarication

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> How far will you go to acheive your dream? How much are you willing to sacrifice? How much can you stand to lose?

" _Do not bite at the bait of pleasure, till you know there is no hook beneath it."  
-Thomas Jefferson_

It was...an unusual invitation to say the least. Written on fine card stock, each line carefully drawn with a brush, the calligraphy more beautiful then Saguru had even seen in the museums around Tokyo. And in the lower, right corner, a laughing, grinning face staring up at him.

He had been invited to dinner, by Kaitou Kid. He wasn't sure what he was supposed to feel about this situation. This was **Kaitou Kid** , the man he had been chasing for over five years. One of the most wanted men in the world. It was Saguru's life dream to see silver handcuffs around Kid's slender wrists, and yet...

This was a...unique opportunity to see the thief one on one. No spotlights, no fans, no police. Just him and Kid, over a meal. Just the thought of the level of conversation they could have sent tingles down his spine. It was rare, that Saguru could find someone worth conversing with, let alone someone capable of it on his level of intellect and interest.

And Kid was more then worth it.

So did he go, or did he stay? Or did he go and have a hell of a lot of back up with him? Though, Kid wasn't stupid, the slightest whiff of someone other then Saguru and the thief would vanish, and the chance to tangle one on one would never again appear.

So, Saguru went.

He had his driver pull around the winding driveway, dropping him off a distance away from the welcoming lights of the mansion. After giving strict orders to return at midnight unless called before, he turned away from the car that was already starting to reverse, staring at the house before him. He wondered, just for a moment, if it was Kid's actual home, before dismissing the thought. It was one of many thoughts that had been plaguing him lately, as he compiled more and more evidence of who Kid was...and each piece pushed him further and further away from his prime suspect.

He knew, in his heart of hearts, with every fiber of who he was, that Kaito Kuroba was in fact, Kaitou Kid...but the evidence just would not point that way. And no matter what, he had to follow where the evidence led, for it never lied.

He shoved his hands into his pockets as he walked up the rest of the drive, eyes casting about lazily, absorbing the things he passed, making notes of what was around him. It was a habit, but an easy way to pass time. People rarely truly saw what was around them, and Saguru had found some of the oddest and most unique things by simply paying attention to what was near by. It had also saved his life more then once.

He paused in his walk, bending over a rose bush that had escaped it's iron fence. Smiling, he lifted a white bloom, inhaling the rich, drowning scent of the rose. Nothing could compare to that scent, it was home to him, reminding him of the rose gardens his mother grew. And while English roses would always be far above any other, this dainty flower had a scent that transported him immediately back to London, sitting in the gardens in deep summer, enjoying tea with his mother while the butterflies roamed about and the laughter of the neighbor children carried in the air.

He used his thumbnail to cut the bloom free of it's plant, taking another deep breath of the scent before sliding the button through his lapel button hole, patting it gently as he continued his walk towards the doors which opened as he approached them.

A young woman stood there, bowing low before him, offering him entry. "Master Kid in the dining room, awaiting you." she said as she straightened, removing his coat from his shoulders as Saguru toed off his shoes, sliding into the black house slippers that were awaiting him. "It's down the hall and through the double doors at the end."

Saguru gave a nod to the maid who was already scurrying off to hang up his coat. He glanced around the entry hall, taking in the rich, well appointed furnishings before exiting through the open door, and down the hall the maid had indicated. At the end of the all, a manservant stood ready, opening the doors as Saguru came closer. Saguru nodded to the young man before stepping into the dining room.

A long, deep cherry dining table caught his attention first, silver place setting glowing from the candles not only on the table, but in the chandelier above it. Roses filled bowls every few places, scenting the air and covering the smell of the melting wax.

And at the end of the table, sitting on the right side, leaning back in his chair, glass of red wine in his hand, sat Kaitou Kid.

Saguru couldn't help but smile, drinking in the scene of the lone thief, enjoying the elegant picture he made in this formal room. "Thank you for inviting me," he said, crossing the room to the place setting across from Kid, where he found his name held in a silver scroll. Taking his seat, plucked his name plate from the scroll, studying it before looking back at Kid. "Afraid you would forget who you were dining with?"

"Just making sure the setting was complete," Kid said with a smile, taking a sip of his wine before setting it aside. He made a motion with his hands and the doors opposite the ones Saguru had entered through were opened, the maid wheeling in a tray with covered dishes.

The deep smell of roasted pork, a sweet scent of butter soaked vegetables, and a few other enticing scents hit Saguru's nose and he closed his eyes, savoring each melody from the tray, his stomach perking up at what he sensed.

Opening his eyes, he looked at Kid across the table, his own smile gracing his lips. "Thank you, for inviting me." he said and Kid gave the slightest bow of his head.

Saguru glanced at the manservant who followed the maid, offering two bottles for Saguru's approval. Saguru gestured to the red and watched as it was opened before accepting the barley full glass handed to him. A quick glance around and Saguru had to smile. What better to glance at the wine again, then the perfect white suit of the man across from him? He tilted his glass slightly, observing the deep brown colour before giving his glass the slightest swirl, watching the the liquid moving about the glass, noticing the thickness of of the trails of the drops sliding down his glass. He wondered, as he tilted the glass towards him, inhaling the aroma of the wine itself, weather the thickness was due to the alcohol content, or the sweetness. Was Kid trying to get him drunk, or just relaxed?

He leaned back in his chair, trying to focus on the 'tasting' of the wine, to wrap his mind around what he had scented from the glass, but he was distracted by the man across from him, who sat, staring, sipping his full glass of wine, still smiling that annoying little half smile that often taunted Saguru.

Saguru cocked an eyebrow at the thief, before taking his first swallow of the wine, allowing it to wash over his taste buds, getting a first inside to the wine before lightly swishing it around, fully savoring all the wine had to offer. He swallowed and nodded to the manservant who filled his glass before placing the bottle in it's holder next to Kid.

"Is it satisfactory?" Kid asked, setting down his own glass and moving back a bit as the maid started to fill his plate, having filled Saguru's while the detective was tasting the wine.

"Quite, a nice quality." Saguru said with a smile, sliding the gold napkin ring from the linen napkin, placing the white square on his lap.

"Only the best," Kid said, following the action.

The pair started to eat as the servants left them, a companionable silence descending as the two focused more on food then conversation. Once the edges of their hunger had abated, Saguru gently stabbed a spear of asparagus, eying the tip of it before looking beyond it to Kid, whom seemed to be chasing a radish around his plate.

"Why did you invite me here?" he asked, trying hard not to smile as the thief seemed to engage in a losing battle against the red vegetable.

Kid raised his eyes to Saguru, giving up on the radish. He smiled, resting his chin lightly on the back of his hand, fork hovering slightly over his plate. "I wanted to propose a...truce of sorts."

"Oh?" Saguru questioned, eating the asparagus, chewing slowly as he focused on Kid more then the food in his mouth.

"We have spent the past five years tag, and frankly it's getting rather...routine. I want something new, and as my most honored rival, I'm extending you the invitation to join me in this new game."

Saguru stopped chewing for a moment, simply staring at Kid, trying to wrap his mind around the thief's words before shaking his head. "I'm not a criminal, Kid."

"Nor do I ask you to be, I simply ask you to be my...partner against much more valuable prey. You would know them as the Shadows."

Saguru swallowed his mouthful and sipped his wine, his mind now running in a whole different track, thinking of what this proposition could mean. The Shadows, the people attempting to kill the Kid. Yes, Kaitou Kid was high ranking on any countries wanted list...but the Shadows didn't even REGISTER on the lists, they were that big of a fish. Saguru had dealt with organized crime before, one couldn't be a detective in any field without coming across at least one case with ties to such organizations, but he had never touched upon something so enormously far reaching as the Shadows.

"How do you propose we go about this...partnership?" he asked, selecting a piece of pork and popping it into his mouth, once more watching Kid, waiting for his answer.

"I can't do detective work...I'm rotten at it no matter what, so obviously that is where you come in. I need to do something more then draw them out into the light, I need someone to keep them there. I need _you_ to keep them there."

"Nothing illegal?"

"Nothing."

"I have one condition," Saguru said after a moment of silent thought spent weighing the pros and cons of such a partnership.

"And that is?" Kid asked curiously, tilting his head slightly to the side as he drained his glass. He reached for the bottle in the holder next to him, pouring a fresh glass for Saguru before filling his own.

"That you're truthful with me about things. That we can form a bond of trust between us. I'm putting my life, my job on the line here for you."

Kid paused, fork dangling absently, the pork heavy on the tines, making it swing slightly. "Trust?"

"Trust. It's not that hard, Kid, to allow someone to know you."

Kid made an non-committal sound, appearing to be lost in thought as he contemplated Saguru's counter offer. His tounge darted out, wetting his lips, before taking a deep breath, raising his glass. "To trust," Kid said, sealing the agreement, watching Saguru over the rim of his glass.

The detective raised his glass, smiling. "To trust," he echoed once he had swallowed the bite he had taken just before Kid spoke. He tipped his glass towards Kid before raising the glass to his mouth, watching as the thief raised his, taking a sip of the deep red wine. Saguru followed suit, the crimson liquid spilling easily down his throat. He set aside the now empty wine glass, wiping at his lips with his napkin.

Kid watched as Saguru's throat moved, the liquid being swallowed before raising his glass again, allowing the liquid he held in his mouth to spill back into his glass. He set it aside before leaning on his hands, elbows resting on the table as he studied the blond who was staring back at him, a look of adorable confusion crossing his face. "Trust, is an fragile thing...easily broken." he said over his hands, smiling at Saguru. The blond opened his mouth, intending to speak, and promptly collapsed face first in his dinner.

"Trust no one, Saguru-kun. It just gives them a reason to stab you in the back." Kid said mildly, pushing his plate away and dabbing at his mouth with his napkin before standing. He crossed around the table, leaning over the detective, brushing back the blond curls before placing a gentle kiss to Saguru's ear. He then turned, shoving his hands into his trouser pockets, walking out of the dining room, leaving Saguru's body for the maid to dispose of.

"It's done," Kid said. He was sitting on the edge of a building, watching the smoke from his companion's cigarette curl up into the air and away from him. He found it rather...nice, of his companion, to keep the smoke away from him, and it was rather un-expected.

Gin watched the thief for a moment before a sadistic smile curled over his lips. He took a drag from the cigarette before tossing it off the edge of the building, ignoring the sound of a card flying through the air, cutting through the cigarette and extinguishing it before it could land on someone.

"No complications I'm presuming?" he asked, removing his hat to push his bangs out of his face before replacing it, shoving his hands into his pockets.

"None, it worked perfectly."

"Good, then this is yours." he said, pulling a manila envelope from under his trench coat and offering it to Kid whom accepted it, tying the bindings and opening it, allowing the photos and papers to spill into his hand. He stared at the face of his father's killer, a brief flicker of emotion crossing through his eyes before being shoved aside. "Why him?"

"Isn't that what you wanted?"

"No, why Hakuba, why him?"

"Because he was getting too close. We still have use for you, we need you around, and not at the other end of his handcuffs."

"How touching," Kid said before standing, feeling the pull of gravity as he stood on the edge of the roof for a moment before turning and hopping down. Gin joined him, though not as gently in his decent from the edge, stumbling slightly. Kid smirked, shoving his gloved hands into his pockets, waiting for Gin to regain his footing before moving across the rooftop.

"Screw touching," Gin grumbled, lighting up a fresh cigarette, again holding it on the side away from Kid, blowing away from the thief's face. "We just need your skills, it's nothing personal."

"Of course," Kid said. He walked with Gin to the roof door before stopping, allowing Gin to get ahead of him. "Go on, I'll meet up with you later for my next assignment."

"Don't worry about it, brat, you're free for a while." Gin said, waving his hand in both a brush off and a good-bye, heading down the stairs.

Kid watched him go, waiting until Gin was swallowed by the darkness before turning around, staring up at the moon above him. "I'm sorry," he whispered, forcing his emotions under the mask of his poker face, even as he wanted to cry for the friend that had died that night.

He took off running across the rooftop, throwing himself off the edge, surrendering to gravity's embrace as he flipped through the air. There was a soft click, and suddenly Kaito was jerked up, floating on the wind current, tears finally breaking through, flowing down his cheeks.


	6. Impeccability

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Are the ghosts just in your head, or are they really there, waiting for an answer? (Companion piece to "Prevarcation".)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Spans two weeks of story time.

**Impeccability**

" _Men are not punished for their sins, but by them."  
-Elbert Hubbard quotes_

_"You killed me,"_ the voice was amused, as if he found the entire situation hilarious. Then again, he was dead, maybe everything was hilarious on the other side.

Kaito shifted in his bed, pulling a pillow over his head, attempting to block out the sounds of the voice, groaning softly. "Shut up, shut up, shut up," he muttered softly, more to himself then the voice in the darkness.

It was the third night since Saguru had died, the third night since he had started receiving a midnight visitor, though if he was honest, the voice never really left him, he just heard it better in the darkness.

_"You KILLED me. Your friend. Was it worth it, Kaito? Did my death give you everything you wanted from it?"_

"Please, shut up," Kaito groaned, flopping over onto his stomach. "Please...just let me sleep. I need sleep."

_"Why?"_

Kaito raised his head, blankets sliding off of his head as he glared at the corner, staring at the flickering, translucent figure sitting in a chair. "Why? Why? Because I need to sleep so that I won't fall off the roof of a building tomorrow!"

Saguru tilted his head, studying the boy in the bed before standing, moving closer to the bed. He reached down, brushing his hand over Kaito's cheek, leaving the thief shivering, staring wide-eyed up at the ghost. _"Then I will allow you to sleep, but I will still be here when you awake."_

Kaito sighed and flipped the blankets back up over his face, trying to block out the sight of Saguru, the feeling of his touch against his flesh. He closed his eyes and burrowed even deeper under the blankets, wrapping his arms around his body as he started to tremble, tears staining his cheeks.

"Our boss is pleased," Gin said, watching the crowd below them, leaning over the edge of the building to get a full view of the police and news crews running around.

Kid made a sound, too busy concentrating on the electrical panel before him to pay Gin much attention. Saguru leaned over the panel as well, before silently pointing to a wire Kid had missed. Kid cursed and un-tangled the mess he had made, adding the missing wire to the jumble, carefully twisting the the wires together.

"He's thinking of giving you a name even." Gin said, finally growing tired of the crowd below, turning to the thief as Kid closed the panel and locked it.

"I have a name," Kid said, pocketing the keys and turning towards Gin. "I don't need another, move please." Kid walked past Gin, glancing down at the crowd below before aiming a small remote control at the spot lights, smiling as they rotated outward, scaring the officers manning them. He stood and turned back to Gin, sliding his hands into his pockets. "Why are you here?"

"Protecting our newest accusation." Gin said with a smile that sent chills down Kid's spine.

Kid stared at the blond for a moment before looking aside, once more questioning what he was doing. "Just stay out of my way." he said. He glanced to the side, watching Saguru who made 'go' motions. Kid took the ghost's advice, falling off the edge of the building, catching himself mid way down and repelling down to the floor he wanted.

"Thirteen dead. _Thirteen._ Kaito, he killed thirteen, and none of them were the target." Conan said, looking at the huddled ball across the room. He sighed, pushing his glasses up his nose and sliding out of the chair. He crossed the room over to the thief, climbing onto the couch next to him. "I'm sorry," he whispered. "I never should have asked this of you,"

Kid shifted, a blue eye peering at Conan over his shoulder before Conan suddenly found himself jerked up, and turned into a giant teddy bear. Kid buried his face in Conan's neck and shoulder, mumbling something the not quite grade schooler didn't catch.

"We need to call a halt to this operation," Conan said, shifting and gently rubbing Kaito's back, the fine trembling under his hand worrying him. "I can't be a part of something that might destroy you in the process. We'll find another way."

"There is no other way." Kid said, finally pulling back from Conan, leaning against the couch, his head falling back. "You've tried for three years. We agreed it was time to step it up, and I agreed to do this. I just...didn't expect tonights events."

Conan shifted himself off Kaito's lap, sitting next to him again, though he ignored the arm draped around his shoulders, still keeping him close. If Kaito needed someone to hold onto, he would act as that for as long as the thief needed. "Will you kill me if they ask?" he questioned, tilting his head back to look at Kaito, voicing the question that had been bothering him since Kaito called to inform him of his first assignment. "Will you kill Aoko, Nakamori or your own mother?"

Kid trembled, turning his face away from Conan, suddenly feeling violently sick at the images Conan's words put into his head. "What do you want me to say, Shinichi?" he asked, tightening his hand on Conan's shoulder to keep it from trembling. "What answer do you want to hear?"

"The truth, Kaito. I want to hear it from your own lips. They've already turned you into a murder, but how far are you going to fall in this game?"

"I will do, whatever it takes, to archive our goals, Shinichi." Kid said, refuse to look at those big blue eyes that were staring up at him, a look of muted horror reflected in them. Instead he stared in the distance, faded gold eyes staring back at him.

"Kaito!"

He turned, absently tugging at the necktie around his neck. He gave the girl that called his name a weak smile, offering her his arm. "Sorry, I was..distracted." he offered and Aoko smiled just as weakly, accepting his arm.

"It's alright, I'm used to having to call your name several times." she teased before looking around at the crowd of police officers, government officials and complete strangers. "Wow, I've never seen so many uniforms in one location." she said, studying the differences between the various police forces.

"He was well liked," Kaito said softly, his eyes trained on the blond woman in black, leaning heavily on her husband's arm, the heavy set man holding his wife, staring at the open hole in the ground that was waiting for the casket.

"So...what are we supposed to do?" Aoko asked softly, unfamiliar with Catholic graveside services.

"I think we just...stand here, while the priest does his thing." Kaito said softly, just as unfamiliar. "Just follow along and hope no one looks at us sideways." he added, giving her a smile.

Aoko hit him lightly on the arm, before turning her attention back to the priest who had started speaking.

"Hakuba-san?" Aoko said softly, greeting the husband and wife pair before they climbed into the limo that would return them to their house that was being slowly packed up. "I'm sorry for your loss," she said, wincing as the blond woman started to cry harder.

Saguru's father looked at the pair and Kaito wanted to wince, staring into the dead blue eyes looking back at them. "Thank you, Nakamori-kun." he said, and his voice was as flat and dead as his eyes, leaving Kaito shivering. This was a far cry from the laughing, jolly man he knew.

Aoko took Kaito's hand, a tear sliding down her cheek as she watched the couple walk away from them, climbing into the limo. She turned, wrapping her arms around Kaito's neck, burring her head in his shoulder as she silently grieved for her lost friend. Kaito wrapped his arms around her, resting his chin on the top of her head as he stared over her to look at the blond staring down at his grave, mouthing silent prayers.

"We need this." Gin said, tossing another manila envelope at the white clad thief. The envelope smacked Kid's face, falling to the floor. Kid remained seated on the edge of the roof, not bothering to pick up the folder. Gin pulled his pack of cigarettes from his jacket, lighting one, his eyes trained on the figure as the flame flared before dying. Curls of smoke floated up, making the thief look slightly unreal through the smoke. If Gin didn't know better, he would think Kid was a statue, carved by a talented artist. Life-like, but still quite dead.

"Your deadline on the information. No fuck-ups, Kid. We need that object." Gin added, though it was needless, the thief knew the consequences of failure. There was still no response and Gin scoffed, turning for the stairs, pulling his jacket tighter around his as the wind picked up. It wasn't his job to babysit the new recruits, not tonight at least. That was left for the team on the other roof, not that it would be needed for a simple meeting.

He paused at the door of the stairs, turning to take one last look at the moonlit man. When Kid had first become a prospect for recruitment, he had laughed with Vodka, anticipating an easy kill. After all, Kid was _not_ known for working with the darker side of the angels, no matter his profession. When Kid had accepted the agreement, Gin had been intrigued and volunteered to mentor the thief. Gin had been sure Kid would fail and it would still be an easy kill, but the idea that Kid would _accept_ , that he would consider staining those pure white wings...that had been interesting.

When Kid succeeded, when Gin had seen the corpse brought out of the purloined mansion, that had been far more then interesting. It had been...a seductive enticement. Kid's hands were now blooded, and the thief was suddenly shown in a different light.

But now...now it seemed as if the thief was broken. Gin couldn't place the exact moment, it had seemed to be such a gradual slide that he had barely noticed it. But Kid was always..off now. Staring sightlessly at things no one else could see, listening to words no one said, lifeless...definitely broken.

Gin had seen it before of course, in others that couldn't handle their jobs, and it was just disgusting as every other time. And quite disheartening. He had such high hopes for the thief, but apparently, he really was just a mark to eliminate.

Gin turned and headed down the stairs, ignoring the itching behind his back as blue eyes followed him.

"Get out of my way, Nakamori-kun." Kid said, staring at Aoko, part of him wondering why the girl was there in the first place, another part screaming at Aoko to just _move_ , and yet another part focused purely on the fact the girl was in front of him, blocking his escape route, with the Task Force stampeding their way ever closer.

His thumb moved off the handle of his gun, clicking down the revolver's hammer, staring down the sight that was focused somewhere just above Aoko's forehead. "Please," he added, a desperate tinge to his voice.

Aoko stared at him, her face set, determined, ignoring the hammering of her heart as she stared down the side barrel before her. "Your time is up, Kid. It's time to finish the dance Hakuba-kun started."

Kid wondered who the hell wrote that speech, before his mind and body grew silent, finger squeezing down on the trigger, just as the Task Force rounded the corner. Nakamori screamed his daughter's name and Aoko looked up at her father before throwing herself sideways, just barley missing having an ace of spades buried in her forehead. Kid ran after the card, leaping over his fallen friend, throwing himself out the broken window and into the night.

Conan slid to the window, almost tumbling out himself, watching as Kid soared off. He gripped the window sill, ignoring the glass cutting into his flesh as he leaned out, almost desperate to grab Kid and shake him until he got the answers of what the hell was going on in the thief's head.

After a moment he turned, watching as Nakamori cradled his daughter close, the man ignoring the girl's protests and words as he rocked slowly back and forth, still imagining what could have happened if Aoko hadn't been half as lucky.

"What the hell is wrong with you?"

Kid found it amazing, that such a roaring voice could come out of such a tiny body. He ignored the question, wrapping the bandages tighter around Conan's hand, before frowning and un-wrapping the latest round, grabbing the tweezers, freeing the small shard of glass he had missed the first go round.

"Answer me, Kaito!" Conan demanded, jerking his hand back, ignoring the fresh blood as he moved unsteadily across the couch on his knees, kneeling as close as he could to Kaito without climbing into the thief's lap, staring up at the shuttered face. He reached up, pulling the monocle off of his friend and partner's face, throwing it across the room, wanting an un-obstructed view. "Answer me," he repeated, his voice softer, desperate. "Please. Yo...you're..." And Conan broke, small body trembling as he clutched at Kid's jacket, leaving a tiny bloody hand print. "You're always gone, even when you're sitting right here. You're staring and whispering and none of it makes sense because there's nothing there! You're silent, so silent I have to stare at you to know you're next to me, I have to feel you to know you're real, I have to watch every breath you take to make sure you're not actually dead. You're not...you're not even _Kaito_ any more. You're just some walking, smiling, broken shell that wears his face! Not even a decent copy."

Conan started to cry, breaking apart, the stress of watching his friend's slow destruction finally climaxing. He buried his face in Kid's chest, trembling with the force of his tears, hands sliding down to wrap around his own body, trying to still it.

The thief didn't react to the words or the tears, accepting the wetness staining his shirt, eyes unfocused, trained on the wall, listening to the whispering voice in his ear, drowning in the sounds wrapped in a rich, English accent.

_"You killed me,"_

"I did," Kid whispered, standing on the edge of a roof, watching as the city moved about it's life below.

_"Was it worth it? Did my death give you everything you wanted from it?"_

"I'm...not sure yet."

_"Why? Why did you kill me?"_

"Because I love you."


	7. à tuer soi-même

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Five years, and no closer to the goal. It's time for the performer to end the show. (Companion piece to "Prevarcation" and "Impeccability".)

**à tuer soi-même**

"You have a choice. Live or die. Every breath is a choice. Every minute is a choice. To be or not to be."  
-Chuck Palahniuk

_Once, when I was much, much younger then I am now. I believed in Good and Evil. I believed there were definite sides with clearly drawn lines. Once...I was Good._

_But life and time changes us all, and I have a great many Dark deeds to my name, Dark twists in my soul. I'm not the person I was once upon a time, I have long since shielded myself against pain, grew cold to the hurt in the world, and in turn, grew cold entirely. I have many secrets that I have never given council for to anyone. I shielded them well in the depth of my soul. All of us do in someway, some not as dark as others, some darker still. But even with the knowledge that we all are hiding something, we all have a side of us un-shown and feared, I wonder, how can one tell if one has fallen into Darkness._

_There is a lot of talk about Good and Evil. In religion they try to make it clear cut. Do this and you're good and you'll be rewarded. Do that and you're evil and shall be punished. Everyone talks about what is Good and what is Evil, what is Wrong and what is Right. I believed once in that firm line that you couldn't cross, the line you shouldn't even touch. I believed that it was there, shining and solid and REAL. But, is it? Is there really a line, or do we just lead ourselves to believe it's there? To we hope that there is some division only because who we are, what we can do, scares us too much?_

_The choices we have to make in our lives are ours alone. No one can force us or choose for us. I no longer believe in the ultimate good or the ultimate evil, I have seen too many sides of the same coin to believe that there is one pure choice either way. But, as with almost everything, I am not sure if I am right, or deluding myself._

_I have been thinking a lot recently about heroes, legendary figures who pick up the sword to fight for what is good, what is pure, and what is right. And I have been thinking about villains, larger then life creatures who represent all that is dark, evil and un-pure in the world. The old image of Good vs Evil that is in every true fairy tale, every myth. And in the end, good always overcomes evil, because that's what makes it a myth, for reality is never so kind. I wonder what role I would play in such tales, would I be a hero, taking up my weapon to champion the cause that I believed was right, or would I be the villain, set to destroy everything that was against me?_

_There is no room in stories to take the middle of the road, because in such tales there is no middle. But I can't figure out what role I play, I was good and innocent once, and I was very bad too. And now...I don't know what I am. I know what some would say, especially some of those who are 'close' to me. Those like Aoko and others who have long since given up and now look at me as if I have nothing left to redeem. Those who think they know what my heart and soul look like but only see the walls and shields I have long since built around me. To them I am nothing more then a cold, heartless being who cares for nothing that is outside his existence. To them, it would be so easy for me to watch everything around me wither and die and because it's not me, not even blink._

_And I can't blame them. I have long perfected the role of looking as they see me. Every day I invent (without thinking about it) a new way to hurt or push away those that care. I purposely do cruel things that I know would turn their expression into one of disgust, I find a way to turn their hearts against me so they can't get close. Once upon a time, it was an act, a role to play to keep myself safe, but I have played that role so long, I wonder if I have not lost myself to it._

_I once blamed Shinichi, life, the Organization...anything and everything for my behavior. But that was probably another lie I created, something to explain the role I designed for myself, the role I could so easily play from a young age. Perhaps, it's not a role at all, but a true reflection of myself._

_But if that is true, how can I find myself, in unguarded moments, caring for others, for something more then myself. If I am truly, the dark, unfeeling, twisted person I portray, how can I feel pain for another, share their sadness and their joy...work to better the world I live in, and hold dear the ideals I do?_

_Which is the true delusion? The good or the evil? Which is the role I created to hide behind? If there is truly not good and evil in the world, and everything is left to a choice of action...then can one be both at the same time?_

"How long has it been since he's spoken?" Heiji asked, looking over the file in his hand towards the white clad figure in the window.

"Four years, eleven months and two weeks." Conan said, stapling another set of pages together before adding them to the folder he was working on. He closed the folder and spun his chair around, sliding it into the bottom filing cabinet, before sliding off the chair and stretching out his body, wincing as his back popped. "Why?" he asked, sliding his glasses off, wiping the lenses on his shirt.

"Just curious." Heiji said, shrugging. "I couldn't remember him speaking since we moved in here."

Conan smiled sadly, reaching out to flick Heiji's cap as he crossed the small living room of the apartment the three shared, climbing up into the window when he reached it. He studied the side of Kid's face before leaning against his shoulder, yawning as the long day caught up to him. An arm wrapped loosely around his shoulders and Conan snuggled more against the silent thief.

It had been five years since their partnership began, and every day they were growing closer to their goals. While this fact made Conan quite happy, the sacrifices that they...that Kid made, dampened it. Often he wondered if there was another path, another choice they could have made that wouldn't have destroyed something crucial in the thief, that wouldn't have changed their lives so deeply.

What was done was done, but regrets still lingered, leaving a bitter and caustic taste in the seventeen-year-olds mouth.

He buried his face against Kid's chest, inhaling deeply the spicy scent of Kid's cologne, trying to block out the thoughts of what could have beens, maybes and possibilities. His eyes slowly started to close, and he shifted again, curling as much as he could in Kid's embrace without falling out the window, sleep stealing away his consciousness bit by bit until he was sleeping softly, his breaths making Kid's tie flutter.

Heiji watched the pair, smiling softly. He set the file that he had been reading aside, laying back on the beat up couch, pulling his hat down over his eyes, still looking over the pair from under the brim. Three years ago, when Conan had shown up on his doorstep, soaking wet, carrying everything he owned in the world, he didn't imagine that he would be sharing not only a house, but his life and job with the small detective, let alone the world's most famous thief, but the partnership worked well, and although he disagreed with how the pair went about things, they did end up with results. And at least Kid kept his nighttime activities away from their little family.

Heiji had fallen asleep by the time Kid moved again, and Conan was jerked away by the loss of the arm around him and the warmth of the body he had been using for a pillow. He blinked sleepily, rubbing his eyes as he watched Kid move away. The thief climbed out of the window, and simply left, not saying a word.

Conan wondered sometimes, if Kid really realized what was going on around him, or if he acted purely on instinct. At times, it seemed as if there was something intelligent inside the body, and others, like now, it seemed as if Kid was almost robotic, moving on instinct and pre-programed plans rather then any conscious thought.

He leaned out the window, holding onto the side so he didn't fall, watching as the thief appeared below him, walking up the street. He sighed softly, sliding out of the window when Kid disappeared around the corner, yawning as he moved over to the couch and climbed onto it, snuggling against Heiji, using the other detective for a pillow instead.

Heiji's arm came up to wrap around him, and it was different then Kid's movements, less cold and instinctive then a human, simply holding him.

"Punctual as always," Gin said, tossing aside the cigarette, stamping it out as he raised his head to Kid who had stopped in front of him, staring at him with that damn poker face. Gin wondered, not for the first time, what thoughts were hidden by that fearless smirk. Four years ago, he had thought Kid too weak for the job, too easily broken, but now, he simply wondered if that wasn't a good thing. A broken Kid had been far more interesting then the all together thief.

He reached out, wrapping an arm around Kid's waist, pulling him closer, watching the shadows that played over the thief's face. That was another thing that had come as a surprise to him. How _beautiful_ the thief could look, bathed in shadows. He reached up with his free hand, brushing his thumb over Kid's lips before pressing his own against them, tasting the sweet wine, chocolate and mint toothpaste that made up Kid's flavor. Three years since he had first tasted Kid's lips, and it was still a delicious experience, though a part of him did miss the coppery bite of the blood that had flavored their first kiss.

Kid's arms went up around Gin's neck, mouth opening easily to the blond's advances, empty blue eyes drifting shut as he allowed Gin to control and demand, pressing his body up against the taller man's at just the right moment to elicit a moan from his lover. Kid knew all the moves, the right steps to achieve what was desired. It was a dance he memorized three years ago and never failed in a movement after. There was no thought to it, no planning or contemplation, just simple, automatic movement.

Gin groaned as expected, pulling the thief even closer, tighter against his body, losing himself in the kiss and the silent enticement the younger man offered. He wanted to give in, wanted to indulge himself in the lithe little body and sweet mouth. It had been too long since they had been together without work distracting them and his craving for this white addiction was getting stronger each second.

But work did call tonight and he forced himself away, to let go of the body so eagerly pressed against him, of the mouth, still doing wicked little things that should be illegal. Kid blinked as Gin pulled away, before tilting his head in a curious fashion, silently questioning Gin. Gin shoved his hands into his pockets, turning away from the thief lest he be sucked back under the seductive spell those eyes weaved, searching for his cigarettes. "I have a new mark for you," he said, finally finding the partially crumpled pack of fags, pulling one out and lighting it.

Kid frowned at the news, before holding out his right hand, waiting for the folder that would tell him about his job. There were only two sorts of missions they sent him on, either a high profile theft, which was of course, his job of choice, and the ones he excelled at. Or they gave him a much darker job to perform. Kid was one of the few good assassins the organization had left. The others had been caught or killed a long time ago. Kid didn't enjoy the job, nor did he really want it, but he was dedicated to his work and part of that was stealing someone's life. And as the organization lost more and more of their hired killers, Kid ended up with more and more of the jobs.

Gin reached into his long trench coat, pulling out a folder and handing it to Kid, using his other hand to remove his cigarette from his mouth so that the smoke didn't go into Kid's face. "He's the President of the Tokyo National Trust," Gin said, tapping the picture of a balding, middle age man paper clipped to the front of the folder. "Boss wants it to look like an accident, or maybe a suicide. Jumping off a building or something."

Kid nodded, opening the folder and studying the information contained within. His eyes lingered at the age of the man's kids, before drifting over to the school portraits of the two children, feeling a slight shiver as their happy, smiling faces looked back up at them.

"He doesn't care about the kids, just do what you have to to achieve the mark's death." Gin said, watching Kid study the portraits of the two children. He had hoped, that with time, Kid would lose that sickening humanity inside him, but every year proved that some spark of it still existed. It had almost caused failure more then once, especially when children were involved. Gin used to wonder, curious when it came to Kid and children, the small detective that constantly followed the thief around in particular, but nothing had ever come of it. No relationships, no hidden off-spring, not even a scandalous relationship with the pint sized tantei-wannabe.

Kid just seemed to have something against killing children.

Kid closed the folder, giving Gin a cross look for his words before allowing his mask to slide back into place. He flicked his hand, the folder disappearing to somewhere Gin couldn't figure out, before the blond found himself wrapped in another embrace, Kid's lips hard against his, the smoke trapped in Gin's throat pouring out and into Kid's lungs.

The thief pulled away after a moment, and between one blink and the next, Gin found himself alone on the street, mind still rather muddled from the talented tounge that had just invaded his mouth.

Saguru watched as Kid leaned out over the edge of the building, trying to tie a wire to the side without falling down the forty floors to his death. He finished tying the wire onto the nail that was to support it, slowly crawling back over the edge of the building, before sitting down, taking the end of the sire and wrapping it around a nail on the edge, then around another further down the lip of the roof.

Once the end was secure around the third nail, he tested it, making sure it was strong and tight before standing. An accident. That was what the boss wanted. And now that the trap was set, he just had to find a way to lure the mark up to the roof and get him near the edge. The wire would do all the work for him.

He raised his head, glancing around the roof, gathering tools as he went, ignoring the sad, haunted look on the ghosts face as he watched him. He was used to that look, it had become more and more prevalent during the past five years, as had the depressed, forlorn tone colouring the voice inside his head.

Saguru had asked him once why...and Kid didn't have an answer. Not anymore.

He finished gathering his tools and slid them into the waiting bag, tossing the bag over his chest before sliding on the black hang glider, taking off at a run, launching himself into the air, trying to push the image of Saguru's face out of his mind, of the look in Conan's eye when he read the case file, of Heiji's anger when he finds it all out.

He let the wind carry him where it wanted, no clear destination in mind, simply giving himself to the fates of the sky and the currents. He thought of Gin, somewhere below him in the sparkling city, doing something that Kid would no doubt never want to know. He didn't know when their...relationship, if you could call it that, had exactly started, or when he had found the blond a perfect vessel to pour into his frustrations, anger, helplessness, desperation and loneliness. But Gin suited his purposes, a release without question, a companion without expectation, and so he continued his dalliances. Saguru never came to him in those moments, and he never questioned the ghost as to why. He was afraid of the answer.

Besides, why had always been Saguru's question. Why did Kiddo what he did, why was Kid a thief, why did he become a murder...why he continued on with the charade when there was less and less hope of succeeding.

Kid hated the question of why. He haded giving answers, hated even acknowledging the question. Why served no purpose nor held any merit. Actions could not be boiled down into a simple and understandable answer.

But still, Saguru asked. And Kid did his damnedest to find a reason.

Kid rolled over in the bed, groaning softly, his back, arms and legs giving a dull ache as he moved. He sat up, running a hand through his hair, giving it a shake before turning, glancing over his shoulder at the empty spot in the bed. Standing, stretching as he moved he shuffled through the bedroom, eyes scanning for his prey before moving out of the bedroom.

He could hear movement in the bathroom and tilted his head, listening for sounds that would indicate the occupant was leaving, before moving towards the small study that was generally off limits to the thief. Confident that his companion was busy, he slipped into the study, locking the door behind him to give him a delay if he was discovered.

He headed for the desk first, searching through the most obvious drawers, before staring at the locked drawer. He gave a frustrated sigh, annoyed at the simple lock. Normally such a thing would be no problem, less then a few seconds to pick, but his lock pick kit was currently resting innocently in his top hat on the nightstand next to the bed, a few rooms away. He sucked on his tounge, standing and scanning the top of the desk, grabbing pair of pen knives that were on display, obviously used as letter openers. He tested the tips of the slender blades before kneeling again, achieving his goal of getting access to what rested in the locked drawer. He frowned, peering inside, curious as to why an empty drawer was locked, and annoyed that his goal was not resting inside. He reached in, his hand searching around. His searching fingers found an un-even groove and he grinned, sliding his finger into the groove, a small button depressing.

There was a click, and the desk blotter lifted, revealing two small silver boxes. Just as Kid was around to slide his hand from the drawer and grab the treasures revealed, there was a second click and a stabbing pain in the hand still in the drawer. He slid his hand free, blinking down at the droplet of blood forming on his finger, before kneeling again, staring into the drawer, studying the needle now raising out of the groove.

His vision started to blur, wavering in and out as he struggled to focus on on the needle. He swallowed thickly, nausea swirling in his stomach, causing him to groan, taking a moment to gain control of his body before focusing on what he needed to do. He stood, weaving for a moment, vision blurring again as he reached for the silver boxes, causing him to miss the first attempt.

A hand appeared as his vision returned and he blinked at it, before looking up at Gin, swallowing hard again against those cold eyes. One of Gin's arms wrapped around Kid, the other reaching into the desk, picking up one of the silver cases. He used his thumb to open the latch holding the case shut, sliding a slender white pill from the case. He held the pill up, long enough for Kid to focus on, before slipping the pill between the thief's lips. "Swallow." he ordered and Kid did so, wondering what Gin had just fed him.

The blond released him, closing the silver case and setting it back into the space it called home. He removed the other case and opened it, staring at the red and white pills inside. "APTX 4869." he said, running a finger over one of the pills before snapping the case closed, looking at Kid. "That's what you wanted, the Organization's miracle pill." He held out the case, in a silent gesture for Kid to take it. Kid did so, curious about Gin's behavior, and quite curious as to the pill Gin fed him.

"I'm not going to ask what they are for, as I'm sure it's better not to know. Just be careful using them." Gin said, brushing his thumb over Kid's cheek before sliding away and grabbing the pair of jeans he had left in the study last night, sliding them on. "I have an appointment to go to, but I want to meet with you later, I have a surprise for you I think you might like." Gin smiled over his shoulder, leaving Kid alone in the study.

Conan stared at the silver case that slid across his desk before looking up at Kid in curiosity. Kid simply smiled, giving a bow before heading for the window, his usual spot after a night spent with his unknown consort. Conan watched him for a moment before turning back to the case, studying it intently, as if the silver cover would answer all his questions. Curiosity got the better of him and he pulled the case closer, opening it.

"What's that?" Heiji asked, leaning over Conan's shoulder, staring down at the neat row of nine red and white pills, and test tube filled with what appeared to be water.

"The Fountain of Youth." Conan said, blinking slowly before raising his head, staring at Kid's back. He had no idea how or when or...anything, but Kid had achieved what he promised. He had produced APTX 4869. Not information, or disks or some other weak chance, but the drug itself, the key to the antidote.

He pushed his chair away from the desk, metal wheels squeaking as they slid over the plastic mat. He left the case on the desk as he crossed the room, climbing carefully into the window next to Kid, taking a deep breath before launching himself at the thief, slender arms wrapping tightly around Kid's body. "Thank you," he whispered, voice thick with emotion. "Thank you, thank you, thank you..."

A gloved hand slid up, gently brushing through Conan's hair and Conan tilted his head up, to find Kid smiling sadly down at him. Kid brushed his finger over Conan's cheek before hugging the teenager just as tightly.

Conan wondered for a moment, about the sadness he had seen in Kid's face, about the finality streaming from the hug, but pushed it aside, his thoughts already consumed by what was to come _After_. After Ai found the cure, after he returned to his natural form, after...so many afters. He could go home, he could return to what was left of his life.

He could finally embrace Heiji as a man, and not as a child playing at lover's games.

After. It was such a beautiful word.

He was startled from his thoughts as a white card appeared before him. Blinking again, he reached out and took the card, staring at Kid's familiar signature before flipping the card over, reading the address on the back. He looked questioningly up at the thief, but Kid was gone, his white glider already halfway down the street.

"Coulda said good-bye." Heiji muttered, joining Conan in the window, taking the card from the teen as he passed over a bowl of ice cream with his other hand. He studied the address, running his finger over the card as he felt something odd about the card, as if there was more there then what he could see. "Oy, do you have any sodium carbonate?"

Conan blinked, wondering why Heiji needed the salt before nodding. He slipped from the window, heading for the small utility closet, grabbing the bottle of water softener before carrying it back out to Heiji who was now clearing off the desk. He sat in the 'visitor' chair, curling all the way up in it, eating his ice cream as he watched Heiji put a shallow pan on the desk, placing the business card in the pan, before grabbing the bottle, pouring a bit of the detergent into the pan. He started rotating the pan, allowing the liquid to smother the card, coating it thickly.

After a few seconds, he used a pair of tweezers to remove the soggy card, wiping the excess liquid off the card as he studied the pink writing across the bottom of the card. "The party begins at 8pm, along with the final show." he read, handing the card to Conan who studied it, his brow wrinkling as he tried to decipher the simple message.

Heiji tossed the paper towel into the pan, carrying it into the kitchen to rinse out. "Phenolphthalein," he called over his shoulder, before setting the pan in the sink, running water into it. "Odd choice for invisible ink."

"Hakuba." Conan said, watching the writing fade away again before setting the card on the heater to dry. "It's a reference to Hakuba Saguru."

Heiji returned, drying his hands on a dish towel, frowning slightly. "Hakuba...didn't he die a few years back? Some bizarre event in a mansion? Why would Kid be referencing him?"

"Because he's the first person Kaitou Kid loved. And the first person Kaitou Kid killed."

"Wait, wait, wait." Heiji said, stopping mid stride, staring at Conan. "Kid...Kaitou Kid, as in Kaito, our Kaito, the man I've shared my life...my _home_ with for the past three years...that Kaito...killed Hakuba Saguru?"

Conan nodded, sighing heavily. "Five years ago, Kaito and I came to an...arrangement. He would sacrifice himself, for our goals. It was my idea, but he was the one who put it into practice, made it a reality. The Organization was quite eager to have such an asset, but given Kid's history and strict morality rules they required an...entrance exam of sorts." Conan trailed off in talking, sliding his glasses from his face, rubbing a hand over his eyes. Heiji took a seat, pulling Conan into his lap, running his fingers through the dark strands, silently comforting Conan.

"They gave him use of the mansion, the servants, the food, and the poison. Everything he needed. All he had to do, was to pass. He invited Hakuba to dinner, created an elaborate story to lure him in, and in the end, he poisoned Hakuba's wine."

"Did you know?" Heiji asked softly, his hand sliding down to stroke Conan's back, trying to keep his emotions from his voice.

Conan shook his head, closing his eyes. "Not until after. He showed up in my bedroom, scared the life out of me. He told me, what he had done, explained it in great detail. He was...gods Heiji, he was out of control. He wouldn't stop trembling, he wouldn't stop moving, I thought, I thought he had lost it. He scared me, he just...wouldn't stop _talking_. It took hours for him to stop describing the scene, each time he'd finish he start back at the beginning. And then he just went silent. He sat on my bed, staring at the moon. Nothing I said would make a difference."

Heiji was familiar with the feeling, having spent three years talking with the white wall. "Then what?" he asked, sensing Conan had more to say, curious as to why he hesitated. Conan rarely hesitated, except when it came to personal matters. The last time Heiji could remember, was when Conan told him why he left Ran behind.

"Then, he told me about Hakuba, not about how he died, he had apparently wore himself out on the subject, but of how he lived. He spent a lot of time, great detail, giving the detective depth, as if to make me see him as Kaito did. It was...incredible, to listen to. Every detail, every description, the way Kaito caressed the words, the love he held in his tone. I finally got it. I understood why he was so broken, why he couldn't stop crying. He loved him. Truly, madly, Romeo and Juliet love. I...after that he fell apart. He stopped speaking, stopped...being. He just existed."

Heiji digested this, pulling Conan closer. He took a deep breath, preparing himself for what was to come, because he knew the story wasn't over yet. There was something that Conan was keeping back. Heiji had no idea what it was, or why Conan wasn't saying it, but he had a feeling he needed to know.

"What are you hiding away in that over worked mind of yours?" he asked, brushing his finger down Conan's cheek.

"I lied to you," Conan said softly, staring off to the side of the chair they sat in, memories of the night playing over his inner eye like a slightly out of focus home movie.

"You lied to me?" Heiji questioned, his curiosity peaked. It wasn't a new discovery, they had started from the start with Conan lying to him. And it didn't stop when he found out the truth, but that was just part of who his lover was. Constant in his attempt to protect people by keeping them from the truth.

Conan nodded, closing his eyes. "When I told you, that you were my first."

Heiji blinked, certainly not expecting that statement. He frowned, trying to connect it in his mind with the previous conversation, wondering if it had been an entirely random comment that Conan just now had the guts to say. But even as he thought that, something went 'click', and he got the picture. "You mean you and..he..."

Conan nodded, closing his eyes for a moment, fearing what Heiji would think, before forcing himself to face it. "I...we...it just...he was so desperate, to feel something, anything but the pain. Ran was pulling away from me, I hadn't spoken to my parents in almost a year and he...he was so...gods I could taste his tears on his lips. I could taste the wine...the poison. I don't even think he realized...I don't think...I don't even think it was me he saw. Not then."

"Have you two..." Heiji started and Conan shook his head, almost violently in his denial.

"Just that night. He avoided me, in fact, for quite a while." Conan stopped talking for a moment, listening to Heiji's heartbeat under his ear, curling into himself, shielding himself. "He always touches me," he said softly, still staring off at things Heiji couldn't see. "It hurts. It hurts to much, to have him hold me, to have him touch me. I know it's not what it should be. I want him to touch me because he cares for _me_ , not because of what happened. He's trying to comfort me for something he did five years ago, some pain he thinks he caused me. I want...I want to take all that pain away and I still can't do it. I can't and it hurts," he whispered, his fist tightening in Heiji's shirt, burring his face against Heiji's chest. "And now I think it's too late."

"Your surprise," Gin said in greeting, waving his hand towards the living room.

Kid raised an eyebrow, stepping through the doorway, removing his hat as he did. He followed Gin's gesture, curious as to what the blond had brought for the surprise, faltering in his movements as he entered the living room, eyes wide.

Snake, the bane of his existence, the man who admitted to murdering his father, sat bound on the couch, glaring angrily, chewing on the edges of his mustache. Kid turned, looking curiously at Gin whom smiled in reply.

"You have done well for us, Kid. Boss figured it was time to give you a reward. Besides, he's worthless to us these days. Also said to give you this." Gin reached into his trench coat, tossing a small bundle at the thief.

Kid caught the bundle, slowly opening it, eyes widening further as a mess of glittering gold and diamond was revealed. He held up the necklace, staring at the gem slowly twisting in the air before moving over to the window, shoving back the curtains to allow moonlight to spill into the room. He held the diamond up to the light, mouth opening slowly, a deep breath escaping him as he watched a crimson glow bloom in the center.

"No idea why the boss is giving you freaking huge gems but I guess he has his reasons. Maybe you can hawk it for something, buy yourself a car, I recommend a Porsche." Gin lit his cigarette, watching his young lover stare enraptured at gem, smiling softly. Yes, he was a mean, evil, sadistic bastard who enjoyed killing people, but there was something about Kid, something about making his thief happy that was worth everything.

Snake watched Kid as well, though his eyes kept shifting, watching Gin out of the corner of his eye. Of everyone in the room, Gin was the one he had the most to worry about. Gin was the one who wouldn't hesitate to kill him. Kid was most likely just going to taunt him to boredom. He watched as Gin moved over to the thief, pulling him close, staring at the gem with the thief before pulling it away from the moonlight and out of Kid's line of sight.

The thief turned, frowning at Gin, closing his eyes as the blond placed a kiss on his neck. "You have other tasks tonight, the to stare at shiny baubles." He gestured with his head and Kid turned in Gin's arms, staring at Snake.

Snake felt as if he was the first person Kid truly looked at in his life. He shifted under that gaze, wondering if the creeping sensation along his skin was from those eyes, or if there were really ants on his skin. He swallowed against his dry through, watching as Kid slipped out of Gin's embrace. The thief moved closer, stopping about halfway across the distance from the window to the couch. He flinched, as Kid raised his hands towards his jacket lapel, relaxing only when it slid past the opening, behind which he knew was hidden that odd gun, and instead ventured up, un-snapping his cape from his shoulders, hang glider harness sliding off after the silky material.

Kid folded the cape, setting it on a table along with the harness, before reaching up towards his face. He set the monocle carefully on the cape, positioning it just so before looking at Snake, shoving his hands into his pockets. Snake wondered, what was going on, why Kid was un-masking, before blinking, truly taking in what he saw.

This was not Kuroba Toichi.

For one thing the man before him was young, too young to be the world famous magician. For another, his face was different. It was slight, but it was there, a slight curve here, a bend there that made a unique and separate person from the ghost he had been stalking. "You're...you're not..."

"His name is Kuroba Kaito," Gin said, waving the hand holding a cigarette towards kid, pouring himself a drink with his other hand. "He doesn't speak. Ever. So you really shouldn't ask him questions. It will just annoy him." He poured a second drink, offering the spare to Kid who accepted it with a grateful nod. Gin leaned against the piano, legs crossing over one another as he studied Snake, whom had started to squirm. "He would be the son, of the man you killed." Gin swirled his drink, smiling wickedly. "Isn't familial revenge grand?"

Snake glanced between the two, wondering if he had mis-judged where the danger truly lay. He still felt Gin was the bigger threat, but looking at Kid, watching him, he was starting to wonder. This wasn't the same thief he had confronted all those years ago on a cold, barren rooftop, this was a whole different creature. Cold. Empty. Whatever fire that had once fueled him was gone and had been for a while. This man knew nothing of games, tricks and laughing devilry. This was a man who had seen the darkest depths of hell and came back to suffer the sin of living with the memories. "If you're going to kill me, kill me." he said to Gin, trying to move the night along. He knew, when Gin came for him, what the end result would be. Gin only came for men like him when their time was up. Gin didn't waste his time with low rank goons unless he had to. Unless he got to spill their blood across the street.

"Ah, but it's not my show to perform," Gin said with a sorrowful tone. "Tonight is the master's performance, and I bow to his whims."

Snake laughed at that, a sharp bark, relief flooding through him. He was as good as walking home already. "Then I shall endeavor to enjoy the performance, before tomorrow's dawn."

"Are you so sure, tomorrow will dawn?" Gin asked, tilting his head slightly. "It's such a tricky thing, predicting when the next sun will rise."

"Of course I am! You're leaving me to the thief's 'tender mercies'? An enjoyable experience I'm sure. I always did wonder why you spent so much time, wrapped up in him. Perhaps I can find out tonight."

Kid gave a shudder, making a disgusted face at Snake's words, draining his drink as if it could wash the feeling of discuss and filth that invaded him as Snake's eyes roamed over him. Gin's smile fell quickly and he stared blankly at Snake, waiting until the man's humour faded under the gaze. "You really should keep quiet. Your speech only makes you look even more a fool, especially if you think anything about _my_ thief is tender. I spend so much time 'wrapped up' in him because he is my apprentice, soaking in everything I have to offer, and I only specialize in one thing."

Snake's eyebrow rose and he looked over at Kid again before snorting. He knew the only thing Kid was 'soaking in' had nothing to do with Gin's specialties. The thief was nothing more then the blond's whore. It was an open secret in the Organization, a dirty little joke to talk about over poker. A pretty little face and tight ass got Kid his position in the group.

"I'm afraid he will never properly squirm," Gin said casually to Kid, brushing his fingers over the thief's neck as he passed to refill their glasses. "You should just move this show forward so we can find more interesting diversions."

Kid nodded, reaching out and seizing Gin's hand before the blond fully moved away, pulling him close and pressing their mouthes together, hungrily devouring the mouth over his as his hand slid up Gin's chest, enjoying the feel of the warm body under his hand before he slid it into Gin's jacket, sliding his gun from the shoulder holster.

He turned, still pressed against Gin, aiming down the sight just slightly above Snake's forehead, before squeezing down on the trigger, staring past the recoil to the man now slumped on the couch, blood sliding slowly from the wound.

He lowered his arm, closing his eyes for a moment before offering the gun back to Gin who accepted it, sliding it back into it's holster. Gin reached out to pull Kid back to his lips, only to find his arms empty and the thief putting on the clothing he had removed.

He moved up behind the younger man, pressing against his body, mouthing Kid's neck, curious as to why Kid was dressing when he was sure he had been clear with his desires that his lover do quite the opposite. Kid ignored the actions, sliding his monocle back in place before adjusting his jacket, staring at the table in front of him. He lowered his arms, a sleeping gas capsule falling into his hand as he did so. He depressed the button on the capsule, pink smoke filling the space around them. As Gin stumbled back away from him, he raised his hand, covering his mouth and nose, turning to watch as the blond fell victim to the gas especially designed against Gin's resistance to anesthetic drugs.

Conan checked the number on the door against the card Kid had given him, before knocking firmly, glancing behind him at Heiji who was prepared for anything that Kid might have waiting for them. The door edged open at the knock and Conan leaned in, listening for the sound of someone behind it before pushing it open even sider, getting a look inside.

He fully opened the door once he realized it had been left open for them, stepping into what appeared to be a high class apartment, glancing around the entry hall, spotting few things of interest. He gestured to the white loafers that were resting next to a pair of black dress shoes, raising an eyebrow at Heiji who shrugged and gestured they move on.

The pair walked carefully, quietly down the hall, glancing through various doorways before finding themselves at the end, walking into a wide living room. Conan opened his mouth to speak, pausing at the tap on his shoulder. He turned and followed Heiji's pointing hand to the end, where a couch rested. Laying sideways on the couch, slumped, was a body, the bullet wound to the forehead a pretty clear indication of the cause of death. Propped up against the couch, resting on the floor, also slightly slumped was a tall blond Conan was quite familiar with. A small gasp escaped him and he dashed across the room, kneeling as he checked Gin's pulse, unexpectedly relieved as he felt the slow but steady beats against his finger.

He stood, turning to take in the rest of the room, and his eyes rested on a white clad figure who was sitting in the window, surrounded by sparkling shards of clear and crimson Kid..no...Kaito, was sitting on the sill, his legs drawn up, arms draped loosely around his knees. His cape, hang glider harness, jacket, top hat and monocle were on the floor, neatly folded and stacked. His red tie was open, draped loosely around his neck, shirt half buttoned, moonlight playing over his chest, causing the small droplets of sweat staining the skin to glitter.

Kaito shifted, turning towards them slightly, resting his cheek against his knees. His eyes were slightly dazed, face flushed, sweat standing out on his brow and upper lip. He raised a gloved hand, wiggling his fingers in greeting.

"Kaito," Conan breathed, moving hesitantly towards the window, mind screaming at him to run, to gather Kaito in his arms, but his body refused to respond. He finally made it to the window despite his body's wishes. He stumbled, falling to his knees, grabbing Kid's sleeve, staring up at the face above him.

Something was wrong. Everything in his body was screaming a warning as he stared up at Kaito, danger firing from every nerve. He reached up, brushing his hand over Kaito's cheek, feeling the sticky sweat coating his palm. Kaito turned into the touch, his eyes closing, a look of remorse crossing his face for a moment. His eyes opened, staring down at Kaito, and Conan watched as they focused in on him, sharpening before fading away again.

Kaito trembled, body lurching for a moment before stilling, the thief making an odd gasping, gagging sound. Kaito swallowed, taking a deep, steading breath before giving a small, weak smile. He shifted, his right hand raising, mouth opening and teeth grasping the gloved tip of his index finger. He pulled the glove off and reached out, gently touching the hand on his cheek, before sliding down Conan's arm. He pulled away from the touch, leaning heavily against the sill behind his back. "I just wanted to say good-bye." he whispered, voice rough, harsh from disuse. Conan could barely hear it, so soft and weak the sound, but he knew the words he heard were true.

"Goodbye? What do you mean, goodbye?"

Kaito shook his head, raising his gloved hand, holding up a long white capsule filled with nothing Conan could guess at. Kaito turned his head, smiling that ever annoying smile that was his trademark. Conan watched, waiting for an answer, waiting to hear that long missed voice again. He watched, as Kaito's eyes grew distant, unfocused. He watched, as Kaito's rattled, thick and liquidly, blood staining his lips with each breath.

He watched, as the life faded from Kaito's body, heart beating it's last beats, before everything faded away, leaving a smiling, broken body behind.

Conan closed his eyes, hands clenching in Kaito's shirt, tears stinging his eyes. He raised a hand, gently brushing it over Kaito's face, closing those brilliant eyes for a final time, his head lowering to rest against Kaito's chest. Arms wrapped around him as Heiji knelt down behind him, holding him close, even as Conan clung to Kaito.


	8. Hotel California

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> When escaping your demons, the best thing you could wish for is forgetting what you're running away from.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Based on the song, "Hotel California" by The Eagles.

**Hotel California**

_Welcome to the Hotel California  
Such a lovely place  
Plenty of room at the Hotel California  
Any time of year  
You can find it here_

_-"Hotel California" by The Eagles_

Saguru stared out the window at the rain lashing the road, lightning striking the ground in front of the convertible, forcing him to swerve, nearly running the small sports car into a ditch. He cursed softly and edged around the smoking spot in the ground before pulling his car up to the side of the road, stopping it and throwing it into park. He rested his forehead against the steering wheel, tasting his heart in his throat as he struggled to get control of his shaking nerves.

That latest strike had been too close. He was a fool to be out here in this storm, but it was his only chance to return home, the darkness shielding him from the demons following him. He took a deep, steading breath, glancing back over his shoulder at the darkly stained asphalt before putting his car back in drive, carefully backing away from the ditch before returning to the road proper, heading back on the winding old highway that he had chosen to make his escape on.

He managed to make it a few more miles before the night and the storm started effecting him again, starting to nod off before being jerked back awake again with each flash of lightning and rumble of thunder. His stomach matched the rolling of the sky, hunger and nausea warning with each other. He ran a shaky hand over his face, tasting the blood from his palm. He glanced down at the dark brown covering his hand, gagging slightly. His car shuddered, rolling over rocks as it drifted from his distracted driving, aiming for a ditch again, before Saguru got control over it, cursing in French this time.

He glanced up from his driving after steading the car back on the road and his eyes narrowed at the sight of light, twinkling between the trees and flashes of lightning. He licked his lips, eyes traveling down to the radio clock the merrily twinkled three am in it's sickly green numbers. Decision made with a yawn, he slowed his car, and soon turned onto the rutted dirt road that came up on his left. He followed the winding path towards the growing lights, another yawn catching him by surprise as he finally approached the lit building, staring up at the Spanish styled hotel, wondering what it was doing all the way out in the middle of no where, in the middle of Japan.

He pulled his car into a slot, slipping out of the convertible and locking it before glancing around, shivering as rain poured down on him, soaking him in an instant. He passed by a Mercedes, running a finger lightly over the water and mud covering it, shaking his head as he headed for the large wooden doors.

He glanced around the doors for some sort of bell or buzzer, finding only a leaf covered brass knocker. He shrugged and reached up, rapping with the metal handle hard, listening to the sound echoed through the thick doors. There was a long pause, and Saguru was just about to rap again when the door creaked open. A brown eye peered at him through the crack before it opened further, revealing a woman with the longest, richest black hair he had ever seen, dressed in a conservative white night gown. She smiled, a quirking of blood red lips and stepped back, opening the door wider, silently inviting him in. He took her up on her invitation, shoving his hands into his pockets, trying to keep his shivering at bay as he moved past her, turning to watch as the woman pushed against the door, having to use most of her weight to close it.

"Welcome to the Hotel California," she said, her voice deep, rich, and it wrapped around him like a warm flannel blanket before echoing down the empty hall. She picked up a small candlestick from ledge waving her hand in front of her, gesturing with the candle. "Shall we?" She offered and Saguru nodded, falling in step behind her as they walked. "I apologize for the lack of lights, our electricity went out a few hours ago. But most everything is in working order if you don't might the darkness." She gave him a smile over her shoulder and Saguru felt a chill for a completely different reason.

"I hope I'm not disturbing you," he said, glancing around him, taking in everything, though avoiding the portraits and paintings whose eyes seemed to follow him.

"Not at all, we are always happy to have guests," she replied, and the pair entered a large courtyard. It was shaped like a square, the building surrounding it on all four sides, framing the small rows of flowers and herbal plants, which themselves framed a beautiful, marble and cement fountain. Saguru stared at the fountain, watching the water as it poured endlessly out of and around a statue of a woman. He watched the woman's face, seemingly crying as the water spilled down it, the statue seemingly staring back at Saguru. He turned away and jumped, startled by the appearance of another woman, this one a pale, wisp of a girl, her hair in shambles around her head, her own long white gown tangled and slightly torn in places.

"Welcome to the Hotel California," she said, and her voice was wispy, a bare and blank tone that caused Saguru to take another look at her, curious as to if she was really there or a exhaustion induced hallucination. "Such a lovely place..." She mused, turning in a circle around her, before facing Saguru again. She tilted her head up, staring into his eyes before reaching a pale hand up, placing it against is cheek, gently brushing her thumb over his skin. Her touch was ice cold and Saguru raised his own hand, covering hers, wishing to will what little warmth he had inside him to her. "Such a lovely face...you seem familiar...do I know you?" she asked, tilting her head.

Saguru looked questioningly at the first woman whom looked back sadly, the candlelight flickering in her eyes. "She has amnesia," she said softly. "Doesn't remember anything but the name of the hotel...and him." The woman turned towards the courtyard and Saguru's eyes followed as he slipped off his jacket, trapping it around the smaller girl next to him, pulling her close, trying to warm her up.

Standing on the second tier of the fountain, somehow keeping his footing despite the water flowing over his white loafers was a man, staring up at the moon. Saguru blinked, then rubbed a hand across his eyes, sure he was hallucinating this time, but no, when his hand returned to his side and he opened his eyes, the man was still there, brown hair fluttering in the rain and wind, cape swirling about his legs.

"There's a man standing on the fountain, in a white tuxedo," he said, as if he no longer trusted his eyes (or hearing since he hadn't heard the man approach).

"Quite." the woman with the candle said before gathering one side of her nightgown in her hand. "Let me show you to your room." Saguru nodded and went to release the amnesiac girl only to find his arm empty. He tuned back towards the courtyard, the only place he could see that she could have gone, and he found her sitting on the first tier of the fountain, leaning against the second, her head resting against the man's calf.

Saguru shook his head and followed his guide, traveling after her as she climbed a set of stairs before pausing in front of a doorway, gesturing to it. "Your room," she said, giving him a bow and the candle stick before vanishing back down into the darkness of the stairwell. He watched her go before pushing open the wooden door of his room. He glanced at the Spartanly furnished room, setting the candle on the small table by the door. He yawned heavily, eyes growing heavy as he leaned over, blowing out the candle, watching the smoke curl up around the crucifix on the wall before stripping off his tie and vest, tossing them in an absent pile in the corner along with his shoes and socks, almost falling onto the bed as he moved closer to it. He roused himself enough to flip over and unbuckle his belt before falling back onto the bed again, wincing at the hardness, pulling his pillow closer. Sleep started to claim his mind as voices drifted up to him through the slightly ajar balcony doors, soft sinking along with merry splashing from the courtyard below.

There was a scream and a shower of blood, staining the floor, the walls, covering him. It was thick, choking. He was drowning in the blood, watching it poor into his mouth, covering his sight in an ugly red tinge. Another scream sounded, this one thick and gurgling, choked off before it was ever fully completed.

Saguru jerked awake, gasping, sweat staining his body. He pushed the blanket off his body and lowered his legs over the side of the bed, running a trembling hand over his face and through his hair. He swallowed thickly and gagged, trying to control his breathing as he lowered his head between his knees, struggling not to remember the feeling of the blood from the dream coating his throat.

Another scream sounded, but this one so different then the one of his dream, this one high and merry. He raised his head, watching the sheer curtains of the balcony door fluttering in the soft breeze. Standing, he started unbuttoning his shirt to get cool air on his skin. He opened the glass door fully and stepped out onto the balcony, looking down at the courtyard. He watched as the three he had first met danced their way around the fountain, their laughter and giddy screams floating up to him.

He glanced at his watch, noting the time of five am before leaning on the stone railing, the curious spectacle drawing his attention. His eyes first found the pale girl, who was laughing and chasing what appeared to be bubbles around the fountain, her thin nightgown and brown hair twirling around her as she skipped, laughed and danced to the flute being played by a gray haired man in the shadows of a tree. She looked so...happy. And childlike. Saguru wondered what had happened to her, to take her memories away, but wondered if it was really important? Did she really need her memories, if she could currently laugh so freely?

His attention was drawn to the man chasing her, doing some odd things that looked almost like cartwheels and flips as he ran after the girl, not trying to actually catch her, but more like he was joining her in some bizarre dance. He had lost his cape and shoes somewhere, now running around barefoot and in that strange suit, looking as wild and crazy as the girl, but far from as free. There was something almost desperate about the man, as if he were pushing himself, forcing himself to have fun, to enjoy himself, and Saguru wondered about him as well. What made him so desperate, so frustrated...so bound?

What invisible monster was chasing the man, that made him run so?

The sweet, soft sounds of a harp started and Saguru's attention drifted from the man to a bench in the corner furthest from him. The dark haired woman was seated now, playing the harp, causing the sadly sweet sounds. He watched, enthralled as she carefully plucked at the glimmering strings of the golden instrument. He leaned further out, as if trying to hear better, watching those long finger gliding over the strings. The flute matched the melody, tugging at Saguru's chest, a lump forming in his throat. There was a soft fluttering, and then a gentle, sweet voice started to sing. Saguru couldn't hear the words clearly enough to hear them, but the sounds were full of longing and regret. A tear started to slip down Saguru's cheek as he shifted his weight, hopping up onto the edge of the balcony, pulling his pipe from his pocket, a pouch of tobacco following. He filled the pipe and lit it, smoke curling from his lips as he looked back down at those below him.

The girl was the one singing, now dancing a strange, spiraling dance in the moonlight, her arms raised over her head as she danced with an invisible partner, though it seemed almost to Saguru as if she were dancing with the wind itself, the way it twisted and spiraled around her. The man, her chaser was sitting on the fountain, one of his legs drawn up to his chest, his arm wrapped around it, the other resting casually by his side, twisting something that glimmered over and over again in his hand, a long chain flowing around and through his fingers like water. He watched the girl, his face closed off, though a small smile played on his lips as he watched her dance.

The sweet smell of rain and roses floated up to Saguru as he took another drag from the pipe between his lips, the spicy scent of burnt wood and spices adding to the sweetness. His eyes drifted and he allowed them to close, simply listening to the song and music, almost swaying to the intoxicating melody, his nightmares forgotten in the darkness of his room.

Saguru was awoken by the church bells ringing out over the hotel. He groaned, shifting, burring his face into his pillow before finally managing to drag himself upright, blinking blearily at his pocket watch, groaning as he fell back into the pillows. He had only been asleep for an hour before being so rudely awoken.

He heard shifting in the corridor, people moving past his bedroom and curiosity got the better of him. He glanced at the door before standing and pulling his pants and shirt back on, sliding his feet into his shoes as he opened the door, still trying to button his shirt with sleep slack fingers. He poked his head out of the open door and watched as the man in the white suit passed, his arm around the young girl, their conversation held in lower whispers then Saguru could catch.

He finally finished buttoning his shirt, following the pair as they headed through the halls towards the courtyard, their steps mirrored on the ceiling of the halls and rooms by the reflective glass panels above them. He wondered curiously at their existence before the thought was driven from his mind as the threesome moved through the courtyard and into the south wing. There they were met by the darker woman, the elderly gentleman, who was glancing continuously at his wrist watch before looking around almost as if waiting for something. The woman smiled at Saguru and offered her hand which Saguru accepted as they stepped into the room from which the bells were emanating.

There was a small chapel inside, dominated mostly by the large crucifix and a long kneeler below it. The others took spots at the kneeler as if the spots were reserved solely for themselves and Saguru followed after a moments of hesitation. He bent his head, folding his hands in front of him, and suddenly he felt an overwhelming sadness. He raised his head, tears sliding down his cheeks as he stared into the bleeding face of Jesus above him, the pain radiating from the statue enough to force Saguru to close his eyes, bowing his head again.

A small hand reached out and covered his own. Saguru turned his head and looked at the small girl next to him, before resting his head on hers, both bowed in silent prayer to a god that had seemed to have abandoned them.

"Please, allow me to stay another night," Saguru said softly. He dug in his pocket, finding his wallet after a moment and opening it. He raised the woman's hand and up ended the wallet, allowing coins and bills to spill into her palm. "Just one more night and I will leave you,"

The woman smiled and took Saguru's hand, holding it tightly as she turned her palm over, spilling the money back into the blond's hand. "You are always welcome here," she said and stood on tip toes, kissing his cheek. "For however long you wish to stay." She pulled her hand back and gathered the skirts of her long black dress, heading for the stairs again. She paused on the second step, before looking back at Saguru, something in her eyes and face that the blond couldn't understand or even come close to naming. "Just...don't get trapped."

Saguru let her words flow around him before he took a step closer, brushing her hair from her face, tucking it behind an ear. "Are you trapped here?" he asked and she smiled before turning away, heading down the stairs. Saguru watched her go before staring down at the money in his hand, frowning slightly.

He put the money away in his room, locking the door as he left, following the path the woman had taken down to the banquet hall below. He found the others already gathered, sipping from glasses filled with a rich red wine, laughing and talking loudly, as if they were gathered for a Saturday evening dinner party, rather then strangers in a guest house. He took the last empty seat, smiling at the woman from earlier before looking across him, catching the eyes of the man in the white suit, feeling a sudden rush of heat across the back of his neck as those deep blue eyes examined him.

"Well, I believe introductions are in order!" The woman said, smiling softly at Saguru as his attention returned to her, and he felt a cool calmness slip over him, quieting his nerves. "My name is Akako, I am the mistress of the Hotel California."

Saguru dipped his head in greeting, raising it as the man on his right spoke. "Most call me Jii," the elderly gentleman said, sitting on Akako's other side and he gave Saguru a warm, welcoming smile. "I have been a guest here for fourteen years."

"Fourteen years?" Saguru questioned, almost disbelieving, but the man simply nodded, returning his chair to all four legs as he took a sip from his wine glass.

Saguru swallowed the sip of water he had been taking but choose not to comment, instead turning his attention to the pair across from him. The man in the suit stared back at him, leaning slightly on the table, not speaking. Instead it was the girl who spoke up, giggling. "I've been here AGES," she said with a giggle that trailed off into a frown, her eyes distant, out of focus. "I don't know who I am."

"Her name is Aoko." The man said, not looking at the girl, instead looking at some spot over the group's head on the wall. "And I am Kaito."

Saguru watched the man before leaning his head on his arm, his eyes now level with the Kaito's. "Do you know her?" he asked, and Kaito's eyes moved from the wall to Saguru's, something passing across the face before being hidden away. The man didn't reply, simply raising up and looking at Akako. "Where are _they_?"

The way Kaito said the word, made Saguru question who 'they' were, and he turned to Akako, who shook her head slightly at him. "They are taking dinner in their room, Kaito, as always."

Kaito made an odd sort of nodding motion before sitting back in his chair as the doors opened and two maids started setting dinner on the plates before the guests, arranging everything just so. Saguru stared down at the misshapen, lumpy gray mess that was his dinner before glancing around at the others who had started eating. Their movements were mechanical, instinctive and unreal. Food was not important to these people, it was just another routine to go through.

Saguru took a breath before digging his fork into the mass on his plate, watching it quiver on the tongs for a moment as he moved the fork closer to his mouth. He took and bite and was overwhelmed by the sheer blandness of the meal. There was nothing inside it. No taste, no texture, just a sheer, empty canvas.

He took another glance around at his companions who were still diligently moving through the motions of eating and suddenly he felt unreal himself, as if he had become trapped in a painting or story. There was no life in the group around him, and as he continued to eat, with each bite he put past his lips, he could feel the life draining out of him.

Saguru was heading back to his room after a night spent in the courtyards, watching the others dance in the moonlight while he sipped the champagne Akako had offered him. His hand rested on the handle to his bedroom door when his attention was distracted by a low groaning from down the hall. He tilted his head slightly, curious at the sounds before following them down the hall, pausing outside a set of double wooden doors at the end.

He read the name plate set into the thick wood, declaring the room was the "Captains Quarters". He heard the groaning again and he gently pushed open the door, poking his head inside, concerned someone might be injured. What he found however, was quite different.

Akako rose above the man laying beneath her, his darkly tanned skin beautiful against the pure white sheets. She made another low sound, moving rhythmically as she drew one of the man's hands up her nude body to her mouth, sucking a finger into her mouth, causing the man to groan, body arching slightly. She smiled down at him, sliding the finger free from her mouth and bending her body over his, keeping their torsos from touching as she lowered her lips into a kiss, her eyes sliding to the side as their mouthes connected, watching Saguru in the doorway.

Her eyes slid back to her partner's face as she pulled back from the kiss, still moving her body over the man's as their hands clasped. The man wrapped his other arm around her waist, sitting up as he followed her lips, capturing her in another hungry kiss, holding her body tightly against his.

Saguru slipped away from the door, closing it behind him, leaning against the wood, ears still listening for the sounds coming from the bedroom behind his back. He swallowed, tilting his head back, loosening the top buttons of his shirt, feeling overheated from such a brief scene. He took a deep, shaking breath before pushing off of the door, heading back towards his room and slipping inside, unbuttoning his shirt fully and opening his balcony doors to allow in cooler air.

He leaned against the balcony railing, shirt wafting around him in the breeze, watching Aoko below him as she absently wondered through the roses, absently snipping one or two with a long pair of shears.

He wasn't sure how long he stood there, watching the girl below, long enough it seemed for her to gather three very large bouquets in her arms. He was startled from his watching by a pair of arms sliding around his waist. He turned, opening his mouth to speak, only to have another mouth slid over his, tounge invading deeply. He groaned in spite of himself, pressing against the body next to his, allowing the man pressing against him to lead as he followed him back into the room and towards the bed.

He could smell Akako, intermixed with the spicy scent he had discovered earlier that evening as having belonged to Kaito. He opened his eyes, staring into the rich blue eyes above him, reaching out to wipe away a trace of Akako's deep red lipstick before pulling Kaito's mouth back to his, pressing his body up against the smaller man's as his bare chest was caressed, slender fingers sliding down his pale skin.

Kaito was gone by the time the church bells rang in the morning and Saguru didn't go looking for him, instead searching out Akako to escort her to the chapel, watching as she coated her lips with the blooded colour Kaito wore to his bed. He took her arm, smiling as he complimented her rich purple dress.

It was easy, to fall into a pattern. The outside world became more distant as Saguru got used to life at the hotel. At dawn he would rise to the tolling bells, dress, escort Akako or Aoko to the chapel and pray. He would then breakfast with the girls, listening to Aoko's chatter about whatever dream she had the night before, and thanking her for the bouquet of flowers that appeared in his room every morning.

He would take lunch in the courtyard with Jii, listening to the man's stories, the sweet sounds of his flute, and always sharing a fresh bottle of wine, the vintage and vineyard never repeated. Saguru wondered once, where Jii always got the different bottles of wine, but wondering was part of the past. Now he simply enjoyed it.

At night, he would watch the four in the courtyard, sometimes from his balcony, sometimes from the edges of the courtyard itself, but he always watched, never joining in on their nightly ritual. And in the earliest of morning hours, he would wait for Kaito, resting in his bed until the other man came from Akako's chambers, wrapping his arms around Kaito's nude body, surrendering to the siren call of those blue eyes.

Days soon turned to weeks, weeks easily blending into months, and, as with all expanses of time, Saguru forgot. He forgot the stormy night, he forgot the nightmares, he forgot Akako's warnings. Instead he remembered, he remembered the soft, sweet touch of Aoko's hand in his, her bright giggles as they spun around the main ballroom to Jii's flute. He remembered the feeling of Akako's hair, spread across his bare chest as she slept. He remembered Kaito's deep voice, alluring voice caressing every word as he read to them from the seemingly never ending library, the rich, fruity wine as it washed over his lips and tounge, tainting the memories of those nights in red.

And eventually, as the year drew to a close, the weather growing colder and wetter, he joined them in their moonlight, bare footed and bare chested as he chased Aoko around the fountain, splashing after Kaito, grabbing that annoying red tie and jerking the man close, staring into the moonlit face, a dizzy feeling sweeping over him as he echoed the smile on those pale pink lips before capturing them, wrapping his arms around the slender body, falling completely into the hotel's snare.

Saguru yawned deeply, following Kaito into the other man's bedroom, rubbing his neck. It was nearing time for their afternoon rests and Saguru could feel sleep tugging at his brain, whispering for him to give in and fall asleep. To distract himself, he glanced around the bedroom, taking in the royal purple and gold furnishings, everything made out of what appeared to either be velvet or silk where there wasn't wood or metal. He raised an eyebrow, running a finger over one of the golden lamps, wondering if the small inset gems were real, though knowing they were more then likely fakes.

He turned his attention from the richly appointed room, taking a seat on the edge of the bed as he watched Kaito behind a silk curtain, stripping off this suit. "How come you have the luxury while I have the monk's quarters?" he asked, amused. He laid back on the bed, almost sinking into the pillow like softness. He curled on his side so he could continue watching his lover's silhouette, smiling at the way the shadow moved behind the screen.

"We get what best fits us," Kaito said simply, stepping from behind the screen and laying on the bed with Saguru, the silk of his pajama's causing him to slide a bit against the also silk sheets. Saguru smiled and kissed Kaito softly, wrapping his arms around the other man. "Then I guess I'll be forced to spend more time in your room, hogging yours." he teased, his eyes slowly drifting closed as sleep once again made itself known to Saguru's brain.

Kaito smiled and tilted his head up for another kiss before snuggling against the larger man, curled in Saguru's protective embrace.

There was a scream, loud and strong, causing both Saguru and Kaito to jerk awake, their head's hitting the other as they moved at the same time. Kaito cursed, holding his temple, wondering for a moment what had awoken the pair before another scream sounded.

"AOKO!" Kaito yelled and went running, grabbing something metallic gray from his dresser as he went. Saguru followed, a knife sliding from his sleeve into his hand as the pair ran through the hall, down the stairs and into the west wing where Aoko's rooms were.

They were joined hallway through the west hall by Akako and Jii, both carrying weapons of their own. The scream was too panicked, too fearful for anyone to be standing there empty handed. Kaito tried the door, before pounding on it, begging Aoko to open it. After another scream, this one causing Saguru's ears to hurt with the volume, Kaito started kicking at the door. He managed to make it shudder but not much else. Saguru pulled the man back, then nodded to the door from their positions across the hall. Kaito nodded and there was a silent count to three. Their bodies slammed into the door and it shook, wood giving way. They did it a second time and the door flew open, spilling the pair into the bedroom.

Blood dripped heavily across the floor, cooling in a large puddle next to the bed, spreading from the body of a man, crumpled in a corner of the room. Akako immediately ran to the body, ignoring the fact her feet left small bloody footprints as she ran through the blood.

On the bed itself, lay Aoko, her blue eyes staring sightlessly at the ceiling, her brown hair turning a dirty rust colour from the blood soaking into the strands. Her chest was torn open, knife visible between her ribs, silver handle glinting in the candlelight, white nightgown torn and shredded. Kaito slid as he ran towards the bed, his knees making a hard cracking sound as he collapsed to them, grasping at her pale, lifeless hand. He pressed the hand to his cheek, sobbing softly as he called her name, desperate for her to answer.

Saguru took in the scene before him, bile rising in his throat, burning and as thick as the smell of blood around him. He stumbled from the room, retching just outside the doorway, holding onto the wall as he emptied his stomach, his own tears filling his mouth. His hand clenched, nails scraping against the wall, skin splitting as the rough stone cut into his flesh.

He felt a hand against his back, rubbing in slow, gentle circles and he turned, looking up into Jii's saddened brown eyes. Saguru swallowed, wiping his mouth on his sleeve, sniffing for a moment before allowing Jii to help him back into the bedroom. Saguru squeezed his eyes tightly shut, not wanting to look at the scene again. He only opened his eyes when Akako stared to speak, though her words were mumbled, his brain unable to clearly process what she said. He gathered the gist, the name of the blond ("Gin, yes like the drink Kaito"), and the fact that there was a guest missing from the gathered. A man by the name of Vodka, the only other guest in the hotel.

The foursome left the room, grouping outside the door as Kaito closed and locked the scene away. They looked at each other for a moment before moving on some silent order, heading down the hall. They started their search in a meticulous fashion, stopping outside each door, each darkened alcove. Akako and Jii would stay in the hallway while Kaito, followed by Saguru entered the dark room or space, searching for the missing guest.

They made their way through the west and south wings by dinner, and paused only long enough to get drinks of water before moving onto the north wing, and then into the east when nothing was found. The foursome stared up the stairs that lead to the east wing proper, each wondering, each dreading what they would find. Unless Vodka had left the hotel, the east wing was the last place for him to be.

The east wing, where most of their rooms were, where they had lived most of their lives at this hotel. They glanced at each other before silently venturing up the stairs, each clutching their weapon tighter in their hands. They started with Saguru's room, moving quickly in the barely furnished room before moving down to Jii's, and then onto Kaito's where Saguru and the other man had been just hours before.

Closets, laundries and bathrooms were all searched and finally the pair stood outside Akako's bedroom, staring at the last unopened door in the hotel. Kaito swallowed audibly before pushing open the heavy double doors, only to be shoved back as the sound of a gun echoed in the hall. Saguru and Akako ran up to Kaito, standing over his body as they stared into the room. Saguru's knife was tucked away as he raised the gun Kaito had dropped, staring down the sight into the room, aiming at the large man standing next to Akako's torn apart bed.

Akako stood next to Saguru, just slightly behind to stay out of his range, her sword crossed in front of her body as if it would protect her. The pair moved by silent signal, stepping slowly into the room, their eyes trained on the man who watched them with wild, feral eyes.

There was a sharp, singing sound and a small silver knife went flying over Akako's shoulder, embedding itself in Vodka's shoulder. The large man howled in pain, reaching for the throwing knife as Saguru fired off two shots, eyes widening in surprise as two playing cards embedded themselves in Vodka's chest and stomach. Saguru heard the sound of someone moving behind him and he shifted, keeping Kaito's gun on Vodka as he turned to look over his shoulder, making sure Vodka didn't have someone helping him who was now sneaking up behind Saguru. But all he saw was Kaito, shifting his body, inching up the wall. Kaito looked up at Saguru, holding his side as he tried to stop his wound from bleeding. He made an odd nodding sound, as if giving Saguru permission for something, before his eyes widened, looking past Saguru.

Saguru turned, cursing the distraction as he was slammed into by Jii, both landing hard on the ground. The pair struggled to untangle themselves and return to the fight, wincing as Akako screamed a battle cry, throwing herself at the large man. "Akako!" Saguru yelled and shoved Jii back from him, raising the gun and firing off three shots, attempting to give the girl cover as she whacked at Vodka with her sword, lacking any form or balance, though her rage made up for it.

Vodka roared in pain as the sword slid through his meaty stomach and he lashed out with his arm, sending Akako flying. The woman slammed into the wall and crumpled into a heap, blood slowly pooling around her head.

Jii gave a cry and threw himself into the fight, dodging Vodka's swipes agilely as he waited for an opening to stab the man while Saguru kept cover with the gun. Jii moved in for a hit, Vodka's chest wide open, but just as he was about to land his blow, a white hot pain erupted in his lower abdomen and he stared at the sword sticking out of his waist, watching his own blood coat the hilt before he fell back off the blade, body thrown as Vodka jerked Jii around.

Saguru watched the old man fall, raising his eyes to Vodka, staring down the sight as the man turned, hammer cocked down, the sound echoing in his ears as his finger tightened on the trigger. He could hear Kaito calling his name from behind him, begging for him to retreat, and as Vodka turned fully, insane eyes staring into Saguru's, suddenly it wasn't Kaito's voice he heard, but Keiko's, his wife as she pleaded for him to spare her.

His hand grew limp as he stared at the brunette woman he had shared his life with, the deep red stains on her nightgown clinging to the flesh underneath, making her look weak and thin. She raised her bloody hands in front of her, shielding her body, still screaming, still begging forgiveness, for his mercy. The broken bloody body of their son lay at her feet, Ginzou's sightless blue eyes staring up at his father's, once golden hair now a thick red from the gaping wound to the back of his head.

His hands started to tremble as he raised his gaze back up to his wife's, a cry escaping him as he stared at the gun in her blood soaked hands, pointed back at him. He heard a gunshot and suddenly he gasped, blood spraying out before him. Kaito gasped, holding chest, staring at Vodka for a moment before collapsing forward. Saguru stared at the body at his feet before raising his head, just in time to see the barrel of Vodka's gun adjust it's position, aiming at Saguru. The blond raised his own weapon, squeezing down on the trigger.

The resounding echo of an empty chamber was followed by a clean shot and Saguru's body suddenly met Kaito's as he threw himself forward, desperate to avoid the bullet heading his way. He didn't' pause as he scrambled backwards, first in an odd crab walk, then flipping over to a crawl, managing to make it to his feet as another shot sounded. He threw himself down the stairs, sliding down several before stumbling to his feet again, stones cutting into the bare soles of his feet as he threw himself across the courtyard, dodging to the left as rock and grass exploded.

He refused the urge to look over his shoulder, to see where Vodka was, already knowing the man was too damn close as another bit of stone exploded, cutting into the side of Saguru's face and hands. He threw Kaito's useless gun away as he burst through the doors to the north wing, sliding across the marble entry hall, leaving a bloody stain behind him as he shoved open the outer doors.

He ran for his long sitting convertible, smacking into the door as he shoved his hand into his pant pocket, searching desperately for his keys as his hand scrambled at the handle. He screamed in frustration as he came up empty handy, keys upstairs, gathering dust in his room. He spun around in a circle, glancing around him, desperate for something to defend himself with, something to use to escape the madman whom he could hear in the entry way.

He spotted the Mercedes next to his car, and then spotted something much better, the keys, hanging from the ignition of the luxury car. He threw himself across the hood of the Mercedes just as the front doors of the hotel opened and gunfire rang out. He knelt for a moment, gathering his bearings before grabbing a large rock and using it to smash out the driver's window of the car. Gunfire rang out again as he managed to get the door open and he hissed as a bullet grazed him, throwing himself into the car. He shifted over and turned the keys, shoving the gear shift into reverse before slamming his hand on the gas.

He closed his eye, desperate to remember what he knew of the front of the hotel, using one hand to blindly steer while the other pressed on the gas, gunfire slamming into the car. Using what little of the rear view mirror he could, he managed to somehow get the car facing the dirt road and heading down it before he felt safe enough to bring the car to a stop and sit up, foot going to the gas as he started speeding down the winding road, now able to see where he was going, ignoring the glass cutting into his skin as he fled the horror behind him.

The black Mercedes slowed as it made the last turn in the road, stopping for a moment, seemingly hesitating before crossing the last mile to an empty slot next to a rusting blue convertible. The car idled for a moment, before finally dying a slow, rumbling death. The driver's door opened, and first a long, polished staff of wood touched the earth, followed by a pair of feet clad in shining black loafer's.

The driver closed the door, pulling his sunglasses off as he looked up at the decaying building before him. Taking a deep breath, the driver started to walk towards the splintered doorway, his steps slow, un-even, but as sure as they had ever been. He pushed open the door, remembering once when it had been heavier, before stepping into the entry hall, skirting the dark brown stain across the marble and the tarnished brass casings littering the floor.

He made his way across the entry hall, the sounds from his footsteps changing as he moved off marble and onto stone, before finding their way across dead grass. The footsteps stopped, halfway across the courtyard, and the driver looked at the bleached white fountain before him, reaching a hand out to touch the side of the second tier, tracing the name carved into the pale stone, making a cross over his face and body before continuing on it's path to the west wing. He headed slowly up the stairs, moving carefully over chipped, cobwebbed steps, grasping the fractured railing desperately, before finally making it to the top of the stairs.

Here he paused again, staring down the shadowed corridor, his hand resting on a wooden door where another, dark brown hand print rested. He brushed the stain with his fingers before allowing his eyes to travel down the hall where an open door awaited him. He turned away from the familiar door next to him and continued on the path of the hall, small clouds of dust raising into the air with each step he took. He entered the opened doorway, glancing down at the gray skeleton next to his feet before turning his head and finding it's expected pair, curled against the wall, tatters of dress clinging to the slender shoulders and frame.

Pushing his long white ponytail over his shoulder, the man moved across the room to the window, resting his body against the edge, staring up at the sky above him. "Think I could get a bottle of 1787 Chateau Lafite?" he asked the echoing silence and a brittle laughter met him in the darkness.

"We haven't had a bottle like that since 1989." the voice answered. An elderly man stepped out of the shadows, giving the stranger a bow. "Welcome to the Hotel California. You're always welcome here, for however long you wish to stay." he said, making his way over to the man at the window, resting his head on the thin shoulder, arms wrapping around the man's waist. "You can check out any time you like," he added softly.

"But you can never really leave." Saguru added, resting his cheek against the top of Kaito's head, white bangs falling forward to cover his eyes, shielding the tears in them.


	9. Sins of the Father

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> How dark can your soul become, when the light is extinguished?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Torture

****

Sins of the Father

_"There's no tragedy in life like the death of a child. Things never get back to the way they were."_

_-Dwight David Eisenhower_

_"I know what it's like to loose a child. I lost my infant son, twenty years ago to SIDS. To this day I still mourn for him. Most days are okay. Other days like his birthday, the anniversary of his death still bother me. I always wonder what he would have been like, what he would be doing. I never got to see him crawl, say his first word, take his first step. My arms still ache to hold him. Losing a child is the most horrific thing in the world. They are supposed to bury us not us bury them."_

_-K.A._

"Hakuba-san, there's a call for you on line two." the receptionist said, giving her boss a bow before excusing herself from Saguru's office as he reached over, hitting the flashing button on the phone before placing the handset to his ear.

"Hakuba, how may I help you?" The young officer said, reaching out with his free hand to dust off a picture of his family before turning his attention to the detached, professional voice on the other end of the phone.

"Hakuba-san, this is Doctor Tanaka at Tokyo General Hospital," the man said and Saguru raised an eyebrow at his phone, wondering what the doctor could want. "We have your daughter here..."

Whatever else the man had said was lost as he Saguru dropped the phone, staring at it in shock for a moment.

His daughter, his little princess, was at the hospital. While Saguru had reasonably knew that one day this day would come, at least once, he was no less prepared for the phone call, especially not considering his daughter was only two years old.

He frantically scooped up the phone, cradling it between his neck and chin as he struggled into his jacket. "What floor?" he rushed out, heading for the door, pulling half of his belongings all his desk as the phone cord stretched across it. Cursing, he untangled himself and the phone before hanging it with a slam, running out the door.

He returned a second later and grabbed his keys, running back out, not caring if he forgot anything else. He jogged the three floors down to the parking garage and grabbed the nearest squad car keys from the board, climbing into the car and jamming the keys into the ignition at the same time he flipped the siren.

He reversed the entire way to the exit of the parking garage, only going forward when he was facing the street, cursing as he moved down the street, glaring at cars that refused to move for the siren. Making decent time to the hospital (which wasn't near fast enough for him), he parked just shy of the automatic doors, leaving the car running as he ran inside and up the stairs to the floor where his daughter and wife awaited him.

Elizabeth was hunched in a chair, rocking back and forth slightly, their nanny rubbing her back as the woman broke down. Saguru knelt next to his wife, taking her hands. "Lizzie, hush now," he whispered, drawing her into his arms. His wife shuddered, clinging to Saguru, mumbling under her breath in French. Saguru rubbed her back, whispering soothing words, looking up at the sound of two more sets of footsteps running down the hall. He looked up, watching as Aoko and Kaito slid to a stop, their momentum sending them pinwheeling for a moment before the pair recovered.

"Lizzie, I'm going to find out what's going on, alright?" he asked, before gently easing his wife off of him, standing and waving Kaito and Aoko over. He peered down at them for a moment before rubbing his hand over his face. "Aoko, I need you to return the car downstairs to the station,"

"Already done, boss." she said, grinning up at him, though it was a bit faded around the edges. "Aki is returning it as we speak, by the way.." She reached into the breast pocket of her uniform, tearing a paper off the pad and handing it to him. "Your ticket for illegal use of a siren."

Saguru shook his head, giving a small, broken laugh before tucking it into his jacket. He turned to Kaito, avoiding the magician's eyes for a moment. "I need..."

"You need to get in there," Kaito said, shoving his hands into his lab coat before shrugging lightly. "Follow me," he said, smiling as he removed his security pass, opening the door that blocked Saguru from his daughter before stepping inside. He lured a nurse away from the bed, allowing Saguru to see the small body covered in tubes and bandages.

He took a seat next to his daughter, a trembling hand gently brushing her bangs from her face. It was then that his emotions really hit him, Saguru burying his face in his hand as he cried softly, terrified for his daughter, feeling broken and helpless. He should have been there for his daughter, not in a stuffy office, going over arrest reports.

A hand caressed his shoulder before arms wrapped around him. Kaito rested his chin on Saguru's shoulder, looking down at his goddaughter before placing the softest of kisses on Saguru's shoulder. "I'm sorry," he whispered softly and Saguru's head fell forward further, taking a shaking, gasping breath. His hand went up to touch Kaito's, gathering what strength and courage he could from the other man.

"I should have been there for him," he whispered softly. "I should have protected her."

"You can't save everyone, Saguru, no matter how hard you try." Kaito whispered before handing the man a metal clipboard. "If you need me to explain anything..."

"I'm familiar with medical reports," Saguru said, straightening and opening his daughter's file, golden eyes traveling quickly over the words, occasionally looking up to rest on the frail body in the bed before him. He closed the clipboard with a snap, holding it out for Kaito to take, one hand reaching out to clasp his daughter's bruised hand.

"Does Lizzie know?"

"I don't know," Kaito said, sliding the clipboard back into it's holder before glancing around, checking if they were alone or not. "Do you want me to?"

"No, this is something I should tell her. Not now though, after...after Kayo..." He choked on the words, burring his face in his daughter's stomach, clinging to her. "I can't...I don't want to let go," he whispered, clutching even tighter.

Kaito said nothing, simply kneeling next to Saguru, rubbing his back as he exorcised himself of the pain and grief building up inside him.

Outside of the room they could hear Elizabeth crying, her louder sobs mixing in with the near silent ones of her husband's.

Saguru leaned back against the headstone, his head resting against the cool marble. He closed his eyes, squeezing them shut for a moment to fight the tears that had threatened before opening them, staring out at the dark night. In his hands he held the autopsy report of his daughter, well read and nearly memorized.

A fatal fracture caused by falling down the stairs. That was the official diagnoses of his baby's death, and yet...he couldn't believe it. It wasn't that Kayo didn't fall down, she did, and often at that, but she had never taken a tumble so bad that it resulted in breaking something.

Saguru couldn't pinpoint it down to a how or why, but something inside him screamed that this was wrong, that there was something more to it, but no matter where he looked, no matter how many times he read the report, studied the facts, he couldn't find an answer, couldn't find another reason.

But still the feelings persisted, and in the back of his mind, a dark suspicion was growing, all centered around the only person that had been with Kayo at the time of her injury.

He glanced up as a shadow blocked the moonlight he was using to read by, staring up at the white suited man perked on Kayo's headstone. "Kid," he greeted softly, scooting slightly so the thief could jump from the headstone.

Kid knelt next to the tomb, pulling a bouquet of roses from somewhere on his person and carefully fitting them into the stone vase before sitting next to Saguru, arms loosely looping around his raised knee. He rested his chin on Saguru's shoulder as he read the police report over the blond's shoulder, mouth moving silently as he read the words before making a grimace at some of the more descriptive medical facts. "I'm sorry," he said softly, turning to look at Saguru who shrugged, nearly upsetting the thief's position on his shoulder.

"Don't be," Saguru said, closing the folder, rubbing a hand over his face, exhaustion catching up with him. "You didn't cause it."

"Mm, but you think someone did." It was a statement, the thief quick at reading between the lines when it came to Saguru's body language.

The blond sighed, drawing his own knees up, slouching further against the headstone. "Two-year-old's just don't up and die, they're amazingly resilient creatures...unless...unless there is _help_."

"Do you think she..."

There was no need to name names, Kayo had only been around one person at the time of her injury, both Hakuba's being at work. Saguru nodded in answer and leaned against Kid's shoulder, allowing the thief to wrap an arm around him.

Kid brushed his gloved thumb over Saguru's cheek, frowning at the lines that crossed the thirty-year-old's face, fresh and new since Kayo had died. "Where's Elizabeth?" he asked softly, wondering why the detective was in a deserted cemetery instead of at home with his wife, especially on the day of their daughter's funeral.

"She deemed it would be more appropriate to spend this night with Tsuneo at the club rather then at home." He sighed, curling more into Kid, closing his eyes. "He would be better able to comfort her anyway," he said, wondering if he even knew how to relate to Elizabeth anymore, let alone comfort her against the loss of their only child. Their marriage had never been one of romance and love, but a simple arrangements between friends to fulfill their families wishes and get out of the trapped lives they lead.

"So she's off with her lover and you're here with me...nice." Kid said, though his voice was bland, absent of any scorn or malice, just a simple statement of facts as they stood. Saguru never knew what the man thought of the arrangement, suspecting the fact that Kaito had endured such for the past five years meant he wasn't that disagreeable to it.

Saguru ignored the words, instead, staring at the small chain swinging back and forth before his eyes. He frowned slightly, eyes crossing as he watched the chain move too and fro from Kid's slight movements. "Excuse me," he said softly before reaching up and grabbing the chain, giving a gentle tug and catching the monocle as it came free from Kid's face.

The thief chuckled softly and swept his hat from his head, ruffling his hair with his hand before taking the eyepiece from Saguru and dropping it into the hat, setting it next to him before pulling Saguru closer, giving him a small hug. "Tell me your theory," he said, and settled back, listening as Saguru started to describe what he thought happened when his daughter supposedly fell.

Kaito sighed heavily, resting his chin in his hand as he took a sip from his Styrofoam cup of the sludge the hospital called coffee. He grimaced at the taste before setting the cup down, turning his head just so to keep an eye on the patient he was monitoring, the rest of his attention on the petite brunette police officer across the table from him.

"There's just no evidence. I've been over the report with a fine toothed comb, not to mention inspected the scene myself and took the witness statement. Everything adds up to Kayo falling down the stairs as she chased after Jun." Aoko sighed, leaning back in her chair, sipping from her own cup of coffee. "I know what Hakuba is thinking but there's just...no evidence, and without evidence..." She trailed off with a shrug, making a face at her coffee and grabbing a small container of creamer from the table.

Kaito raised his head, turning his attention fully to Aoko, sighing as well. "He's adamant that there's something else at work. I'm worried for him, Aoko, he's obsessed with finding the smallest shred of...something against Jun. If Kayo really did just fall...he's pushing himself too far and getting too wrapped up in this. He's not thinking logically or rationally."

"Do you think he'll do something stupid?"

"Kayo was his world, he's a grieving father convinced his daughter was murdered, what would you do if someone killed Tadao?"

"I would destroy the world." Aoko said, with all the conviction of a mother avenging her child. She bit her lip, worrying at it for the moment. "Do you think we should keep watch on him? I mean, if he does something, and Jun really didn't have anything to do with Kayo's death..."

"If Saguru gets it into his head to do something to Jun, I don't think even we could stop him." Kaito said softly, staring down into his black coffee, watching as his face waved in the reflective surface. "I highly doubt we'd even know about it until it's over."

Aoko frowned at Kaito's words, stirring her coffee absently, mind worrying for their friend.

"Just tell me the truth, Jun-kun." Saguru said softly, almost melodically as he lightly trailed a finger up the girl's arm, pushing down slightly as he reached the indention his knife had originally carved out of her. The salt on his finger tip mixed in with the open wound, causing the girl to give a muffled scream against her gag, body arching, twisting to escape the pain.

Saguru tisked and pulled back from the former nanny, staring silently at the trembling girl before turning to his table of toys, humming softly as he ran his fingers over the selection on the table. He smiled, selecting a small scalpel testing the blade against his finger before turning up the radio, the loud hard rock music nearly screaming in the small room, effectively covering any sounds Jun might make. He turned back to the girl, giving her a small smile before lashing out, cutting a deep line across her face, splitting her mouth halfway across her cheek.

Jun made a gagging, sobbing sound, tears flowing freely from her eyes, mixing in with the blood flowing down her cheek. Saguru reversed the direction of his hand, striking out randomly, smiling more as another deep crimson line appeared on the nanny's body, slicing open her shoulder. He repeated the motion with more pressure, laughing as bone and muscle peeked through the wound.

Jun gave a ragged, broken scream, fighting against her bindings, eyes wide and terrified, exciting the beast already strumming through Saguru's veins. He lashed out, hitting Jun hard on her un-injured cheek, causing the girls' head to snap to the side. Her eyes grew glazed, pain and terror clouding her mind, loosening it's grip on reality.

Saguru gave her another hard smack before tossing away the scalpel, instead reverting to a more primal form of torture, simply beating his victim, pausing only long enough to force the girl back into consciousness before returning to the brutal blows.

Tired and panting, Saguru leaned against the table of toys, blood dripping from his hands. He tilted his head, examining the broken and bruised body in front of him, frowning as he noticed un-marred patches of skin, flesh that was still whole and pure.

This just wouldn't do. This wouldn't honor Kayo.

His foot lashed out, sending the chair flying back, Jun falling hard against the cement floor, the handcuffs binding her clanking loudly against the hard surface. He started humming again, licking his palm free of blood before selecting a large, curved dagger from the table. He tilted the elegant knife, watching the dim lighting play off the honed edge of the blame. Elizabeth had given him this dagger on their second wedding anniversary, her smiling face to bright with happiness as he gushed over the beautiful ceremonial blade.

It would only be right, to use his wife's much treasured gift, to honor his wife's loss with such an act. He gave the cold blade a tender kiss before turning his attention on the girl who seemed to be trying to wiggle away from him, despite most of her body not responding to her and being still bound to the heavy wooden chair.

He made yet another tisking noise, kicking her hard in her already cracked ribs before he poured all of his anger, all of his sadness, all the hurt and betrayal he felt from Kayo's death into the pouring rain of stabs he delivered to the body beneath him. Once more, he only paused long enough to gage Jun's consciousness before returning to his mutilation of her body, blood splattering him and Jun in large sprays, flesh scraping off in large chunks. When the knife became too slippery to hold, he tossed it aside, instead tearing at her flesh with his bare hands, nails digging into wounds, pulling on the torn flesh in a vain attempt to rip it from her bones.

Tears flowed down Saguru's face as the man raged, a deep guttural growling spilling from his lips, too far gone to form the proper words to express his emotions.

Bloody, covered in bits and pieces of things that made up a human body, he grabbed the knife again, once more stabbing, sinking the blade into any piece of flesh he could find, his body shaking, heaving with each heavy breath and sob.

Aoko and Kaito stared at the scene, both stunned to silence. The air was too thick, the scent of copper thick on their tongues as they tried to swallow. Aoko made a gagging sound and Kaito squeezed his eyes shut, whimpering as he found the scene imprinted on his inner eye, unable to escape the horror.

Something inside Aoko snapped to attention and she pushed away the human reaction of revulsion and fear, falling back into a familiar role as she raised her gun. "Put down the knife, Hakuba-san." she called, her voice firm, despite the trembling of her body. She had known something was wrong, when Kaito called her, panicked at the vanishing act both Saguru and Jun had pulled, but nothing could have prepared her for finding her friend murdering...no, destroying another person.

Kaito gagged softly after opening his eyes again, and without warning the experienced trauma doctor vomited, kneeling as he gagged, acid burning his throat, mixing in with the coppery tang of blood from the air and forcing him to gag harder.

Saguru ignored them both, still stabbing, still sobbing. He couldn't even hear them, too consumed with his task, his madness. He absently noted the warning shot fired to his left, a mumbling following the shot but it didn't matter to him, had nothing to do with his purpose and so he continued on.

Aoko swallowed thickly as she adjusted her aim, narrowing down at the top of Saguru's head, just above his ear. "Drop your weapon!" she called again, before adding a soft, nearly silent, "Please, Saguru,"

There was a growl from the blond and the turned towards the pair, annoyed with their interference, his mind finally registering their appearance. Aoko yelled as he turned, firing off two shots, watching in horror as the blond jerked, falling back across the mutilated corpse.

Kaito took off running before Saguru had even hit the ground, sliding in the blood, kneeling next to his lover. He pressed his fingers to Saguru's neck, his hand trying to cover the two bleeding bullet wounds to the man's chest. He tore off his shirt, pressing it hard against the wounds, tilting Saguru's head back as best he could one handed before pinching the blond's nose, breathing into those slack lips.

Aoko shoved her gun into it's holster, joining Kaito next to the other man, first securing the knife before holding the shirt firmly against Saguru's chest, using her other hand to turn on her radio, calling for an ambulance as Kaito gave his attention to getting the blond's heart and lungs started again.


	10. On the Second Day

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> If you were given three days to save your lover's life, would you take them? Or are some things meant to be?

**And on the second day...**

_A million words would not bring you back, I know because I've tried. Neither would a million tears, I know because I've cried. –Unknown_

It was the second day of Golden Week and Saguru felt as if nothing could be better then these days. Here he was, seventeen, in the prime of his youth, allowed to do nothing more then to lay on the grass, sun shining down on him, illuminating the book under his hands, with his boyfriend curled up next to him, deeply asleep.

He knew that tomorrow things would be different, even on vacation he still had a job to do, just as the boy next to him did, and their jobs would lead them into a chase that was a few steps away from life and death and somewhere in-between 'fun' and 'adventure'.

But that was tomorrow and this was today and today, Saguru wanted nothing more then a refill of lemonade and maybe for Kaito to remove his elbow from Saguru's side.

Saguru closed his book and set it aside, resting his head on his arm as he gently ran his fingers through Kaito's hair, smiling as the other teen curled more against Saguru, making a soft, happy sighing sound before settling back down.

Saguru's eyes slowly drifted shut as he allowed the heat and smell of spring to lull him into rest, arm curling possessively around Kaito's shoulder. The sounds of birds and a distant lawnmower followed him into sleep's embrace, colouring his dreams with their noises.

It was the rain that had awoke him, at first a small drizzle, lightly hitting against his face and hands, chilling the skin and dampening his clothes. Then it became a fierce downpour, soaking everything it could in it's fury. His eyes blinked open, and he shot up, shivering as he realized what was going on. Kaito shifted at the action, before awakening himself, teeth chattering slightly as he glanced around in sleepy confusion, mind catching up quickly to the fact he was wet and it was raining. The pair glanced at each other, sharing a smile before gathering their belongings and making a dash for the house, barely making it up the porch steps before there was a crash of thunder and the heavens opened up even further then what they were, flooding the earth.

Saguru sighed, holding his soaked book before his attention was drawn to his boyfriend who was leaning on the porch railing, watching the rainfall, un-heeding to his soaked person. Saguru was drawn to the smile on Kaito's lips, moving over to the teen and wrapping an arm around his waist, giving him a gentle squeeze before turning his attention to the rain as well, pushing aside the annoyance and cold to simply enjoy the moment life offered to him.

"GET DOWN FROM THERE!" Nakamori yelled at the thief who was hanging off of a modern art sculpture that was itself, hanging from the ceiling.

Kid looked at them, grinning embarrassedly. 'I would, but I'm kind of busy," he called cheerfully, carefully reaching for the gem he was targeting for the night. He growled softly, stretching his body further, fingertips just barely brushing over the diamond when suddenly there was a loud crack. The Task Force and Kid looked up, staring at the chains that held the sculpture in place.

"Kid..." Saguru said, his eyes trained on the chains. "Get down, NOW!" he roared as the crack in the cement holding the chains spread.

Kid's eyes widened and he scrambled to get down, switching his weight to the safety cables. The statue crashed to the floor, a sharp edge slicing through the wires holding Kid, taking the thief down with it. Saguru and the Task Force went running, coughing in the dust clouding the air. Several uniforms started clearing away the rubble, desperate to uncover the fallen thief.

There was a new cough and Saguru knelt, shoving dust and rubble away, uncovering Kid, who was coughing in the thick air, blood speckling his lips. "Hurts," he mumbled, looking up at Saguru. The blond brushed his fingers through Kid's hair, pulling the fractured monocle from Kid's face so that the shards didn't fall out and into Kid's eyes.

"Relax, Nakamori called for an ambulance," he whispered, taking his boyfriend's hand.

Kid gave another weak cough and stilled. Saguru blinked, his hand flying to Kid's throat, checking for a pulse, his cheek hovering over Kid's mouth, waiting, desperately for a breath as he stared at the white clad chest. As the seconds ticked by, tread and horror seeped in as he failed to find a pulse, chest unmoving, breath still.

He tilted Kid's head back. He slipped his thumb between Kid's lips, ignoring the blood, already knowing it was safe to touch. He pulled Kid's mouth open, sealing his own lips over his lover's, pushing his breath into the still body, watching as the chest rose out of the corner of his eye.

Nakamori knelt next to him, his hands clasped, resting on Kid's shirt as he started compressions, counting under his breath. Saguru breathed again, silently praying as his lungs slowly emptied into Kid's. He raised up again and watched as Nakamori pushed on Kid's chest, the chest bowing with each thrust.

Leaning in again, he breathed, tears slipping from his eyes, splashing down against Kid's face, mixing with the blood. "Please," he whispered as Nakamori took up compressions again, the older man's face a mask of worry and fear. Saguru leaned in, taking a deep breath before his lips met Kid's.

Saguru stared off the edge of the building, watching the last of the swirling lights fading away. He shoved his hands into his jacket pocket, taking a deep breath, toes edging at the lip of the roof, sending small rocks flying over the edge.

He wondered what it would be like, to follow those rocks. To fall forward and let the wind catch him. He had seen Kid...Kaito do it so many times, simply fly off the building, gathering the air and wind about him, his laughter echoing into the night as his shining white wings opened, carrying him away.

But that was the past as of three hours ago. Kaitou Kid had been declared dead at eleven-fifty five and thirteen seconds in the evening. His lover, Kuroba had been declared dead at eleven-fifty five and sixteen seconds in the evening.

He swallowed, pushing his emotions aside again, already having had one break down this evening, in front of the media no less. He sighed, wiping at the drying tear tracks, trying to stop the replay of memories rushing through his head. Of things he could have done, should have done...it was all so useless.

"It's hard, isn't it. To watch your love slip away," a voice said from behind him and Saguru turned, watching as Akako joined him on the edge of the building, her thick traveling cloak rustling in the breeze. "The winds mourn their king," she whispered, pulling a lock of hair from her face before turning to Saguru. "What would you do, to re-capture your love?"

"Anything, but it's impossible. He's dead and there's nothing left," Saguru whispered brokenly.

"Nothing is impossible, Saguru-kun. You should know that by now." Akako smiled sadly at him, taking his hand and pulling him from the edge. "Come with me, let us see what the spirits wish."

Saguru followed her tugging, too distraught and broken to really care or listen to what she said. Kaito was gone, in a way that even he couldn't escape. Everything else was white noise, whispers and absent words. If Akako wanted to spout meaningless drivel at him, mumbling things that didn't really register, that was her choice.

Saguru found himself sitting at Akako's alter, watching the mini-skirt clad witch as she bustled around, setting a handful of candles and jars in his lap before arranging things on the alter. She patted his head, stroking her fingers through his hair as she seized what appeared to be a stripped and polished willow branch, standing and keeping her body as close to his as she could. "Ready?"

"Huh?" he said, shifting and looking up at her before blinking.

"I'll take that as a yes." She cleared her throat, tossing her hair over her shoulders. "From the earth that is her body," she started her spell, turning in a slow circle around the pair, imagining a flowing, golden ribbon following the branch. "To the air that is her breath, to the fire that is her spirit, to the waters that are her living womb, goddess, I beseech you!" She finished the spell on a yell, her wand meeting it's starting point.

There was a sudden clap and a hovering golden ring floated around them, twisting and turning in the air. Saguru stared at the golden band while Akako set the wand down and poured a glass of white wine, kneeling before the alter. "Earth, bone, and winding sheet. Let the spirit come to me, yet send it in piece or not at all." Akako said, raising her head as a wind rushed through the stone room. The candles flickered for a moment, almost going out before turning strong again, revealing a woman in the air above them, her long hair hanging in a braid past her ankles, dressed in a tight fitting dress that was faded with age.

"What do you wish of me, child?" the woman asked, looking down at Akako, and Saguru was struck by the resemblance between them, before his brain caught up and he realized the woman was _floating_ in the air. He scrambled back, and two hands shot out, one ghostly and one flesh, grabbing him before he could break the sacred circle.

"We wish to know, if he can be saved."

"Yes. Call the lost, and then call back time," she said, knowing her daughter would under stand which spells would be needed. She smiled, raising her hand and gently tracing a symbol on Saguru's forehead. "Luck be with you, child, so that you may return him to us."

The woman vanished, as did the white wine, and Saguru blinked, wondering what the hell the woman had smoked. Akako stared at the mirror in front of her, turning the words over in her mind before looking at Saguru. "Are you _sure_ , you would do anything to bring him back?"

"Yes," he breathed, looking at her, desperate. "Please, I need him."

She let out a heavy breath before nodding. She pulled out two pieces of parchment and a quill, quickly writing out two pages of characters before handing them to him. "Take these, one will reverse the spell, if you want to back out. The second...you might need. It will buy you some time, but you _have_ to repeat it every first day."

"Every first...what?"

"You'll see," she said before putting Saguru in the direct center of the circle. She opened an exit for herself before closing the circle, creating a second, shining purple ribbon of energy around herself to protect her from getting sucked into the spell. Kneeling, she set up seven green candles around a picture of Kaito from the first day of golden week, lighting them before using one of the flames to light both a gold and silver coloured stick of incense.

"Guiding spirits, I ask your clarity, lend me your focus and your charity. Lead him to what he needs to find, for his sanity and his peace of mind." She then pulled the photo free of it's frame, a bit sad she had to destroy it, but figured if Saguru achieved his goal, it would be worth it to have Kaito back.

She held the photo over a frame, waiting until it caught fire before dropping it into a silver bowl. "Hear these words, hear the rhyme, I send to you a burning sign. Then his future self he'll find, in another place and time."

As flames licked over the Kaito's face, the pressure of the air increased, causing Saguru to gasp. The photo's flame started to die out, ashes falling off and smothering the flames. As the last flame died, there was a sudden popping sound and Saguru was gone. Akako sighed, extinguishing the candles and putting them away as the circles faded. "Good luck, my detective."

Saguru jerked awake as his alarm clock blared, the loud ringing switching easily over to the daytime talk show that Saguru enjoyed listening to as he went through his morning routine. He panted softly, pushing sweaty blond bangs from his face before looking at the clock and falling back with a groan.

A nightmare. A simple, stupid, horrific nightmare.

He laid there, staring at the ceiling, wondering what possessed his brain to give him such a horrific vision. He could still feel his heart pounding in his chest, the fear and terror he felt when Kid...when Kaito had died thrumming through his veins.

He wanted nothing more then to curl back up asleep and dream of something far more pleasant before he started the day.

The phone on his nightstand ran merrily and he groaned, reaching out and grabbing the handset and mumbling something that sounded vaguely like a greeting.

"Good morning," Kaito said, laughing at the sleep lacing his lover's voice.

Saguru smiled, his heart giving a skip at the sound of his boyfriend's voice. After the nightmare he suffered, it was a nice thing to wake up to. "Morning." Saguru sat up in bed, glancing at his clock before running a hand tiredly through his hair. "What's up?"

"Well, I was talked into taking Aoko on a picnic and wanted to know if you wanted to join us?"

Something tingled in Saguru's brain, the words sounding familiar but he brushed it off. "Sure, what time?"

"Ten?"

Saguru glanced at his clock again, noting it was already nine thirty. "Sure, do you want me to bring anything?"

"Maybe some of Baaya's cake?" Kaito asked hopefully, madly in love with the housekeeper's sweets.

Saguru laughed. "Alright, I'll see you at ten," he murmured and said good-bye, hanging up the phone and yawning, climbing out of the bed and getting ready for his day.

"I can't believe you did that, Kaito!" Aoko said, looking over her shoulder at the poor guy the young magician accidentally sprayed soda on.

"Oh come on, he's fine, Aoko." Kaito said, blushing and moving forward past Aoko and Saguru, using them to hide him, not that he needed to hide except from his own embarrassment.

"It was amusing, if rude." Saguru said with a smile, the tingling back but once more shrugged off. He hefted the picnic basket again, the weight of their left over food rather heavy. He paused for a moment, re-adjusting the basket, watching Kaito and Aoko move ahead of him. He frowned, watching the scene, feeling an odd moment of deja vu and his eyes raised up, looking at the large, heavy branch of the tree above the pair.

"MOVE!" he yelled at them and the pair turned, taking a few more steps forward, just as the tree branch gave a loud groan and suddenly fell, crashing to the ground where the pair had been. Saguru blinked, staring at the fallen branch, a shiver coursed through Saguru's body as he stared at the pair who were staring back at him with wide eyes.

This had happened before. In his dream last night, that same branch had fallen, striking Aoko on the temple, giving her a concussion.

Picnic basket forgotten on the ground, Saguru raised a trembling hand to his shirt pocket, fishing around for a moment before pulling free two scraps of paper. He stared at the writing, remembering Akako bent over, scratching out the characters written on them.

"Oh dear god," he whispered, raising his eyes to stare Kaito. If...If what he saw was real. If this was reality replaying...

Kaito was going to die in two days.

"I'm going to be sick," he whispered, and promptly passed out.

There were voices around him, worried and hushed. Saguru groaned, his head throbbing as he slowly blinked open his eyes, staring at the fuzzy, faded ceiling above him before closing his eyes again. He waited a moment, before trying again, this time the ceiling coming into focus, revealing a water stain in the shape of Africa above him.

He raised a hand to his head, meeting a wet cloth on his forehead, before the water stain was blocked by a worried brunette.

"Saguru?" Aoko asked, adjusting the cloth on his forehead.

"I do believe that's my name." he said weakly, before turning his head to fully look at Aoko. "What happened?"

"You passed out rather suddenly." She said, taking his wrist and checking his pulse, her eyes on her watch. "Kaito called dad who brought you here...uh, here is my house. You've been unconscious for a couple hours." She released his wrist and made a note on a piece of paper before smiling at him. "I called Baaya, she's already called your father. Dad called a doctor he knows and he recommended you stay here for tonight. I'm supposed to make sure you eat something, drink something, and rest." She had a stern look at her face as she detailed her jobs.

Saguru had to laugh at the look, before groaning as the laughter made his head hurt. "Then I guess I will have to be agreeable to your demands. I'm not as nimble as Kaito." he said, smiling at her. "You mentioned food?"

Aoko nodded and stood, heading for the kitchen to prepare Saguru a light dinner. After she left, Saguru forced himself up, groaning as his head swam. Once the world stopped pretending to be a Tilt-a-Whirl, he fished his cellphone from his pocket, pressing Akako's number, listening to it ring.

"Hello, Saguru-kun." Akako greeted as she picked up, the sounds of whispered chanting behind her voice.

"Am I interrupting?"

"Not really, just a crappy movie." The sounds were silenced and Akako's voice returned. "I have foreseen your call."

"Then you know why I am ringing you?"

"Quite. You wish to change history."

"But is it history, or the future now?"

"That depends on if you can accomplish it. Have you used your papers yet?"

Saguru glanced at the door for Aoko before pulling the papers Akako had given him. "Not yet, some..things have come up."

"Apparently you have figured out it's not a dream. Perform the daily one now, Saguru. There is no time to lose."

Saguru stared at the papers, wondering which she meant before taking a guess based on the wordings. "Is there anything special I need to do? Candles, incense..."

"I thought I would have put that on the paper."

Saguru blinked and looked back down at the paper. "You mean the three weeds and a representation of death and a bowl of water?"

"That would be it."

Saguru read through the paper again, a frown marring his lips. "Akako...this is a revenge curse against a cheating spouse."

"Death steals a loved one just as well as another lover. Not to mention none of the protection spells can protect against death. This is binding his life to that curse, either until you save him or until the time resets itself."

"But, wouldn't this curse effectively save him?"

"You have to stop the event, Saguru. But remember, every cause had an equal and opposite reaction." with that, the witch hung up, leaving Saguru to stare at his cellphone.

Saguru sighed, sliding the phone away before glancing towards the kitchen again. He watched as Aoko sung along to the music playing softly on the CD player, stirring something on the stove. He smiled, hoping he could keep that happiness with his actions before he stood, closing his eyes to block the dizziness that was effecting him. Once it had passed, he slipped from the house as quietly as he could, tiptoeing around to the garden in front of the house, searching the ground before gathering three weeds that were slowly strangling the other plants, braiding the plants together carefully as he stared at the sky.

"Please let this work," he whispered, staring down at the tangle of weeds in his hands. "Please." He headed back into the house, glancing at the kitchen again before tiptoeing his way into Nakamori's room, looking around before spotting the locked gun case next to his bed. He knelt, pulling a key from his pocket, thankful beyond expression that Nakamori had entrusted him with a copy in case anything happened.

He unlocked the case and pulled out one of the boxes of bullets, removing one of the deadly objects before returning everything to the way it was before he entered. Detouring into the bathroom, he filled a cup with water, figuring it worked just as well as a bowl.

Pulling the paper from his pocket, he dropped the tangle of weeds and the bullet into the cup, shoving them deep down and re-filling the cup with water before clearing his throat.

"You have been so evil, stealing my guy," Saguru read, feeling slightly foolish. He couldn't help but shiver though, as a tingle traveled up his spine, the slight tickling sensation causing his back muscles to spasm. He couldn't explain the feeling, it was different then anything else he had ever felt, but it felt...incredible.

"So unto you, this curse I hurl." he breathed, closing his eyes as the tingle grew stronger. "Don't ever go near my very best friend, or another time this curse I'll send."

He blinked as the tingling started to fade, confused. "That's it? That's all the protection we have?" he knocked the cup into the sink, resting his head in his hand. "Fuck." he cursed, body trembling.

He took a deep, shuddering breath before wiping the hand over his face. He grabbed the cup, dumping it out completely, slipping the bullet into his pocket before tossing the weeds into the garbage as he passed, heading back for the living room.

"Oh, there you are Saguru-kun!" Aoko said, grinning at him. "Your dinner's ready."

Saguru stood on the upstairs porch, watching the rain falling down on the grounds below. It was the second day, and once more it was raining. Below him, Kaito was doing what Saguru could only guess was interpretive dance about how much the boy loved the rain.

Saguru wanted to smile at Kaito's antics, it hurt something deep inside that he couldn't, but all he could do was stare at Kaito, and worry. He was no closer to finding a way to save his boyfriend, no ideas occurring to him and tomorrow night, he would be forced to watch his lover die.

"Please God, save him." Saguru whispered, resting his forehead on the porch railing.

"KAITO!" Saguru screamed, dashing for the thief just as the statue started to fall. He raised his gun, slicing through the thief's safety wires, shoving the falling thief free of the statue, ignoring the scream Kaito gave as he watched the art piece slam into the blond, burring him, blood splattering across the marble floor.

Saguru choked on the cloud of dust that was burying him, blackness encroaching on his vision. _At least he's safe_.

Blackness claimed Saguru after that thought.

It was raining again. It always rained on the second day, always a three pm. Saguru was huddled in his bed, tears sliding down his cheeks as he started at the list. Kaito had died five times. Twice by falling, once by a rookie's bullet and once being run over as he tried to make it to the heist when Saguru made him late.

Once when Saguru tried to knock him out with his own gas.

Nakamori had died three times, Saguru had topped out at six so far, even Akako had gotten caught in the crossfire and expired once. And in an event that still left Saguru speechless fifty people died in a 100 car pile up that Saguru had accidentally caused by tripping Kaito.

Every death weighed heavily on him. It didn't matter that they were all currently alive at this moment, it didn't matter that whomever died tonight or tomorrow would be alive again as time re-set. He still watched them die.

He laid back on his bed, staring at the ceiling. He had been through the same damn three days, for as close as he could figure, a month. Ten times that time re-set itself. Sixty-five deaths.

And no hope of stopping the next one. Every time he thought of a plan, every time he thought he had it...he woke up on the first day of Golden Week, just in time to be invited to a picnic.

He groaned, resting a pillow over his face, blocking out the sound of rain. He missed the sound of Kaito's laughter, but he just couldn't handle another day watching the smiles and the dancing. He couldn't handle another happy moment.

He threw the pillow across the room and drew his list close to him again, studying it, trying to ignore the names of the dead while he focused on the ideas that had failed miserably. Rubbing a hand over his face he turned away from the list, intending to stare out the window blankly until a new plan formed, but instead found his attention drawn to the papers Akako had given him before this all began. Reaching out, he picked up the papers, moving aside the all to familiar and memorized protection spell to instead stare at the second.

A reversal, something he was quite familiar with lately, but this was one to break the cycle, to admit defeat.

He stared at the paper for a long, silent moment before shifting his attention back to the list, back to the long column of names, those that he had sacrificed, for his own happiness.

Was it worth it, to save Kaito, to try again..when someone died anyway? Was it worth it, to have another stain on his soul?

Maybe...maybe this was destiny. Maybe Kaito was supposed to die, and every time he didn't...or even did, the fates cut another string to spite him.

He looked at the paper again, silently mouthing the words, closing his eyes as tears slipped down his cheeks. He could feel himself giving up, losing the hope that had been so fresh when he first realized what was happening.

Kaito was gone, and there was nothing he, nor anyone could do to prevent it. No matter what, in the end, it wasn't worth the sacrifice of someone else.

He swallowed thickly, wiping a hand across his eyes, steeling himself for what he was about to do, only to be startled as a rock hit his window. He looked up, just in time to see another small rock rain against the glass. Frowning, he stood and crossed over to the window, opening it and looking down at the brunette teen on the law.

Kaito paused, arm back in preparation of another throw, looking up at Saguru with sad eyes. "Why are you mad at me?" Kaito asked softly, cutting through to the heart of the matter.

Saguru gave a soft smile, wiping his eyes again before leaning on the window sill. "I'm not mad, Kaito, just tired." He paused, taking a breath before speaking again. "Would you like to come up?"

Saguru kissed the bare shoulder of the teen sleeping next to him before sitting up, the blankets pooling in his lap as he reached out for the paper he had set aside in favor of more enjoyable pursuits. He licked his lips, turning slightly to take a final look at Kaito's slumbering form before speaking. "My spell went wrong, please reverse it. Don't mess it up, and don't pervert it." he whispered, and gasped at the rush of...something that slammed into him. The past thirty days flashed before him, playing like a ghostly apparition in front of his eyes. Ten reversals, sixty-five deaths, morning, night, morning, night, laughter and tears, each and every little bit of _time_ he had experienced melding together, the events moving faster and faster until they blurred, making Saguru nauseous.

And suddenly it all halted and Saguru forced open his eyes, choking slightly on the thick scent of incense filling his nose.

"Saguru?"

The detective turned, staring at Akako who was gaping at him, a copper bowl falling from her hands. "What...but you..." Realization slowly came over her and a tears traveled down her cheek.

"I'm sorry," Saguru whispered, lowering his head. He suddenly found himself on his back, a sobbing witch clinging desperately to him. Saguru wrapped his arms around her, his own tears falling as he finally grieved, for Kaito, for the others lost, for the thirty days he spent struggling to find an answer.

For the part of himself he lost to time and magic.

"I'm so sorry," he whispered again, sitting up, cradling Akako, resting his cheek on hers.

_Time. It can be a moment, an instant, an eternity. It can stop, it can speed, it can repeat and steal. In the end, there is never enough, and no matter how hard we try to grasp those small, fleeting moments, time will slip through our fingers and vanish as silently as a shadow fading away._

_Time is the enemy of all things, and time will eventually catch up. But time can grant us the greatest treasures. It can give to us a single instant, that we can hold forever in our hearts, and no matter what, nothing can take those instants away, not even death._


	11. Dialogues with the Cadaverous

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Saguru has a conversation with Kaito.

**Dialogues with the Cadaverous**

" _Most conversations are simply monologues delivered in the presence of witnesses" -Margret Miller_

"Are you comfortable now? I tried to get all the blood off, but it's hard to tell. I'm sorry about your cape, I needed it for a bandage, I'm sure you understand."

"It's so bloody cold in here, do you think we should break up that chair for firewood?"

"The fire helps, I hope you don't mind I tossed you hat and jacket in there, it doesn't seem to be helping you though, you still feel so cold, freezing even. I can't believe we've been here two days now. Are you hungry? I'm sure you are, you always seem to be hungry during the day. I think we have a few candy bars left, I can't believe you took chocolate with you on a heist."

"Five days, five bloody days in this cabin, I can't wait to get out of here. What _possessed_ you to pull a heist with a blizzard warning, in an avalanche prone area? Honestly, somedays I wonder if you're exactly sane. I can't _wait_ to get out of here. No offense, but I'm getting a bit sick of your company. First thing I'm going to do when I leave, I'm getting the largest steak I can find and eating it rare, maybe even raw. Never eating chocolate again."

"No more firewood, no more clothes unless you want me to burn your pants, but I think you kind of need them. I wonder how much longer it'll take them to find us...I wonder if they're even looking any more. It's so fucking cold."

"How can you just stand to lay there? It takes everything I have to keep moving, to keep warm, you must be so cold, you feel cold, your lips are almost frozen to the touch, your fingers dead weight. How can you be this cold and not have frost bite? You truly are unbelievable."

"It's been six days, eight hours, twenty-five minutes and thirty-nine seconds since that avalanche locked us in here. Five days, fifteen hours, twelve minutes and seven seconds since we ate our last bit of food. One hour, thirteen minutes and two seconds since my pocket watch stopped working."

"S...so c..c..cold. I'm so tired of the cold...so bloody tired. I thought body heat was supposed to keep a person warm? Then again, you're as cold as ice, colder then ice even. There's no warmth from you. How can you be so cold? Must be why you just lay there, conserving your energy. You don't even flinch when I wrap my arms around you. I wonder if my tounge would freeze to you..."

"Was that a sound? Is the snow shifting? Get off of me so I can go look. Hmm, odd, there's no movement yet I could have swore I heard something. Maybe it was just you shifting and I didn't notice."

"There's that damn noise again, stop moving around, it's keeping me up.

"It's lighter in here then it was before. Maybe I'm dying and this is the light of heaven coming upon me. If I die in here, promise my mother that she'll know I loved her, even though I left London. And take Aoko out sometime, if you don't hurry up someone else will come along and take her away. And don't let anyone catch you either. I still can't believe it took an avalanche to get proof of who you are. Now no one will never know because I'm dying and heavens calling."

"So bright, why does heaven have to be so damn bright? And why is it taking so long to die? Wait, I hear them, the sweet angels calling out to me. I didn't know angels speak Japanese, but then I guess they would, being the first of creations."

"Why do they just call my name over and over? Why can't they just come here and take my soul? You hear that angels? Come and take me already dammit!"

"If I'm dying, shouldn't the cold be fading? So bloody cold, I can see my breath even. It was amusing at first but now I just want to die. It's already been too long, my body is too weak to go on, and those angels are still calling to me...they're getting louder now at least."

"What was that? It sounded like something banging on the door. I wonder...perhaps a branch got stuck and the shifting snow is forcing it against the door? No, that would be a scratching sound and this is distin...holy mother of disco Jesus! The door just fell in! It's Nakamori, and oh lord he's got Hattori-san with him. I'm never going to live this down."

"All clear, sir. We've recovered Hakuba and he's in the ambulance on his way to the closest hospital. He doesn't look good sir, I think we just barely made it in time."

"Anyone else in the cabin? I heard reports that Kid was near him when the avalanche hit. We haven't collected any other sign of the bastard."

"Sir, there's a body in the den. It's hard to say, but it could possibly be Kid, though I couldn't tell you for certain. Couldn't tell you how long he's been dead but judging from the wound on his head I would say a fair bit, the blood is heavily iced over."

"How can you not tell if he's Kid?"

"He's...well, he's only wearing his boxers, sir. The monocle's there in the room but nothing else. No hat, no suit, no cape. The ME's in there now if you want to discuss things with him."

"How is it?"

"Not good, Nakamori-san. With this damn cold and the cabin covered in ice, it's almost like a freezer in here. There's minute evidence of decay, they obviously had a fire going, judging by the decay, the fire and the time spent, I'm thinking the boy might have been dead since the avalanche. His wound is a fatal blow, and there's no evidence of a fight or of him simply falling."

"So...my detective has been stuck here with a dead body since the avalanche eight days ago?"

"I couldn't say for sure until we perform an autopsy, but...you might want to have a psychologist on standby at the hospital."

"Do we have an ID yet?"

"Not yet, we have to wait until we take him to the morgue to get fingerprints. I can tell you he _was_ at least, the criminal known as 'Kaitou Kid', there's an indention on his nose and cheek, similar to where the monocle would have sat on his face."

"Can I...see him?"

"Go ahead, I've finished my exam and just waiting on transport."

"This is..."

"Do you know him?"

"I thought...I thought I did, but now...maybe I didn't know him as well as I thought."

_Fin_


	12. Vicissitude

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The day Kaito Kuroba stopped smiling, the world didn't end.

**Vicissitude**

_Sometimes the mind, for reasons we don't necessarily understand, just decides to go to the store for a quart of milk. -Unknown_

The day Kaito Kuroba stopped smiling, the world didn't end.

Saguru watched him from the corner of his eye, listening as Kaito answered the teacher's questions in a bland monotone, giving her only the most basic of answers before returning to his worksheet, leaving Aoko and Akako frowning at the brunette.

Saguru licked his lips before returning to his own work, trying to ignore his thoughts that were intent on surrounding the blue eyed magician who seemed only a shadow of himself.

The day Kaito walked away from him without a word, everything went on as normal.

Saguru watched him walk away, his mouth still open, about to speak. Kaito had just...walked away. Kaito _never_ walked away, he would always stay to at least listen to whatever crackpot idea or theory Saguru had, if at least to smile and laugh as he proved Saguru horribly wrong.

He followed Kaito, unable to stop himself, desperate for answers. He followed the boy through town, always five steps behind, making sure Kaito didn't see him, even when the boy turned around suddenly, a frown marring his features.

He watched, from his position behind a tall, thick bush, as Kaito sat on a rock, over looking the docks down below. Kaito reached into his pant pocket, pulling out a shining, glittering object, watching as the glass wrapped in silver twisted from a long chain, the monocle reflecting the setting sun as it twisted in the air.

Saguru swallowed, as he watched Kaito, watching that perfect, well used poker face start to crack, and then crumble in a wash of tears, and as he watched, his heart aching, he reassessed his definition of normal.

The day Kaitou Kid failed to appear for a heist, Saguru went after him.

Saguru pounded on the door to the Kuroba residence, anger and fear melting together as the door opened on it's own, hinges squeaking. Saguru slid one hand into his jacket, removing his revolver and making sure it was fully loaded (even though he already knew it was, he had checked it before leaving for the heist), then stepping carefully into the dark house, eyes scanning the front hall, ears ready for the slightest sound.

He made his way down the hall, carefully keeping to the wall, a nervous sweat breaking out on his neck as he peeked around the corner, studying the dark living room. He saw a figure on the far side of the room, and he hesitated, unsure if it was foe or friend.

He shook his arm, flashlight falling into his palm and he pressed the tip against his thigh, clicking it on, keeping the light blocked by his leg as he moved into a better position. He raised the flashlight, shining it into the room, gun directly under it, ready to fire.

Kaito what might have once been a couch, his legs drawn up to his chest, chin resting on his knees as he stared in front of him, un-seeing. Blood stained the boy, more blood then could possibly be his alone and Saguru swallowed as the bitter scent of copper finally hit him.

His eyes left Kaito and traveled around the room, following the slow movement of his flashlight as he took in the scene. Blood covered the carpet, walls and even the ceiling in long streaks. Tables and drawer chests were over turned, large gouges taken out of the rich, dark wood. The couch, a chair and even the wallpaper was ripped apart, peeling, stuffing spilling out like leaking organs.

The television was shattered, glass sparkling as his flashlight swept over them, and in the corner, huddled, broken, was Kaito's mother. The blood pooled around her was a neon sign of her health, and probably explained most of the blood on Kaito.

Saguru took another sweep of the room before setting his flashlight on what had once been a book shelf, raising it towards the ceiling to illuminate the room as well as it could before he pulled the radio from his pocket, adjusting the volume and frequency on the box attached to his waist before radioing in the scene, listening to the dispatcher's cool tones as she relayed the information to the police and medics.

Clipping the hand piece to his jacket, he holstered his gun, grabbing the flashlight again and moving gingerly across the floor, tiptoeing as he tried desperately not to step in the blood. Finally he made it across the room and he knelt, knowing he would have to turn over not only his shoes but his pants to forensics judging from the blood wetting his knees. "Kaito?" He looked up into the boy's face, wanting, desperately, to shake the boy, to smack him until those eyes focused.

"Kaiiitooo," Saguru had no idea why he sung the name like a five year old on a sugar high, but he did and was thankful there was no one around to hear him. Pulling a pair of vinyl gloves from his pocket, he slipped them on before reaching out and grabbing one of Kaito's hands, gently pulling it away from Kaito's knees, checking the boy's pulse.

He never saw the fist that suddenly impacted the side of his head. he went backwards, landing in a sticky puddle of blood, blinking, lights dancing in his eyes as his head reeled from the blow. Kaito was moving now, unfolding his body, blood covered hands landing on the couch, one curling around something Saguru hadn't noticed and would kick himself for later...if there was a later.

He rolled to the side, just missing being skewered in the shoulder by a large kitchen knife, sliding a bit in the blood on the floor. Scrambling backwards, he tried to get a hand to his gun and still move away from Kaito at the same time, watching as the teen's dead eyes followed him, before he lunged onto Saguru, stabbing down where Saguru's thigh had been.

"Kaito!" Saguru yelled, bloody hand slipping on the gun and causing him to fall instead of craw back. He felt a heavy weight on him and tried to buck Kaito off, wincing at the tight grip around his neck. "Kaito stop!"

"You killed her!" The sheer rage in Kaito's voice stunned Saguru for a moment, those broken, raspy words causing Saguru's heart to give a painful thump. Saguru fought off the freeze and twisted, managing to knock Kaito loose, himself leaping, trying to grab Kaito's wrist and get the knife.

Kaito, however, twisted away in a move so familiar from Kid heists and he lunge, knife sinking deeply into Saguru's arm. The detective screamed in spite of himself, staring up at hollow, rage filled eyes. Kaito wasn't seeing him, that much was obvious, he was seeing whomever had killed his mother.

And if things didn't change, Saguru was going to die for it.

He grabbed the wrist that was pulling out the knife, using as much strength that he could muster to hold that hand still. Kaito reacted by shoving the knife in again, causing Saguru to scream again, blackness flooding his vision. In the fractured mirror on the floor, he could see himself, Kaito, and the tip of the knife sticking out his back.

Nausea swamped him and he faltered, falling forward against Kaito, breath ragged, his grip on Kaito's wrist loosening. Kaito jerked the knife out, staring at the warm, wet blood coating the blade. He licked his lips, tasting the blood that had splattered on them before plunging the knife down, this time slicing through Saguru's hip, at an odd angle that had the the knife going in at the top, yet sliding out the side, the form of the blade visible under his skin.

Saguru gagged and Kaito suddenly grabbed the detective's throat, squeezing, nails digging into the flesh as he growled angrily. "Not yet, you don't get any relief yet," he gave the knife a twist before jerking it up, slicing through the flap of flesh it had been trapped under.

Saguru vomited, the stench forcing him back from Kaito. He raised weary, half focused eyes, raising a bloody hand to Kaito's cheek, gently caressing the smooth skin. He could feel tears sliding down his cheeks, stinging his bitten lips. He swallowed, gagging again before leaning in, pressing his lips against Kaito's. As he did, he reached down, pressing Kaito's rest to the floor, forcing it harder and harder, using every last bit of strength he had, forcing the knife from Kaito's hand under threat of the wrist snapping.

His hand wrapped around the weapon, clutching it tightly, the blade slicing into his palm as he pulled away from Kaito, watching the teen before suddenly slumping forward, almost pushing Kaito back against the floor.

Kaito stared over Saguru's shoulder, face blank with shock, eyes open wide, disbelieving. He started to tremble as he gathered the larger boy in his arms, the violent shaking and the blood still flowing from Saguru making it hard as he gathered Saguru up in his arms, carrying him, even after he fell to his knees, sliding in the blood, to the remains of the couch, laying the detective on the battered, torn piece of furniture.

He stared at the other teen, at the blood covering their bodies, a mixture of his mothers, his and Saguru's. He reached out a shaking hand, almost touching the shoulder wound before vomiting violently, blood spilling from his lips. He reached out a hand, seizing Saguru's radio after a few tries, dragging the hand piece to his mouth, depressing the button.

"O.." he gagged, coughing to clear his throat. "Officer down, Kuroba residence." he choked out, ignoring the dispatcher's questions as he dropped the hand piece and laid his head on Saguru's un-injured thigh. He weakly turned his head, ear pressed to the flesh, feeling the faint thumps of Saguru's pulse in the artery below the skin, each tiny thump echoing in Kaito's head, as he waited for the last one to come.

"Will you just...if you don't set that down I swear to god I'm going to..."

"Relax, it's not like it will...oops."

"That was my _grand-mother's_. You _broke_ my dead grand mother's ming vase!"

"Relax, I'll get you another one!"

"Kaito!"

"I meant legally!"

Saguru growled ineffectively at the wild haired boy standing before him, reaching down with the hang not currently bandaged within an inch of it's life and trapped in a sling, wheeling his chair backwards as he best he could, almost turning in a circle before he managed to straighten himself out and head back down the hall.

"Oy! Come on, Goo, don't be like that!"

"My grandmother's vase!"

"I'll glue it!" Kaito yelled, chasing after the detective, rather amazed the blond could move a wheelchair as fast as he was with only one arm. He finally caught up to the blond and grabbed the handles of the wheelchair, wheeling Saguru down the hall and into the lift that would take them back down to the main floor.

"No _idea_ why I let you live here," Saguru muttered.

Kaito smiled softly and leaned down, pressing his lips against the blond curls, closing his eyes as the spicy sent of Saguru's shampoo filled his lungs. "Because you love me," he whispered.

Saguru reached up with his good hand, taking Kaito's and bringing it to his lips. They were a long way from healed, a long way from alright, but they were there, and it was enough for the moment.

The lift doors opened and Kaito wheeled Saguru towards their bedroom, humming softly as they passed the large wardrobe that held his mother's alter, the scent of roses and incense floating around them in a warm embrace.


	13. Paroxysm

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Let's play a game, Kaito-kun...

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Male/Female sexual content.

**Paroxysm**

_Hatred is a four letter word, love a four letter lie._  
– _Anonymous_

"Stop, I need to go..." Kaito squirmed away from his lover, trying to button his shirt and keep Saguru's hands out of it at the same time.

"You can give it another hour," Saguru whispered, leaning in to nibble on Kaito's neck, trying to lure him back to the bed and more enjoyable activities.

"No, I can't, she's expecting me," Kaito groaned, tilting his head back in-spite of his words, his arms wrapping around Saguru's neck, pulling him up for a hungry kiss, groaning as his taller lover pressed their bodies together. He always loved feeling Saguru pressed against him, dominating him.

"So, it's not like you haven't been late before, she's rather used to it." Saguru muttered, leaning in for another kiss, only to find his head hitting the wall. He turned, looking at his lover who had slipped out from under him, glaring as he angrily buttoned his shirt. "What?"

"She shouldn't _be_ used to it, Saguru. She's my wife, the first and foremost." Kaito finished buttoning his shirt and turned, sighing. "I'll see you tomorrow." He tilted his head up, receiving a gentle kiss, Saguru's arms wrapping loosely around his waist in a hold that both knew wouldn't last.

It never did.

Kaito pulled away and sighed, his fingers brushing down Saguru's cheek before slipping on his shoes and leaving, heading for his 'real' life, where his wife was waiting, none the wiser of where her husband spent his afternoons and more often then not, his nights.

"Welcome home," Aoko said, leaning against the opening that lead to the kitchen. Kaito's bags dropped heavily on the ground, as he stared at his wife. It had been a long time since he had come home to such a sight.

Aoko shifted, moving closer to her husband, her long, sheer black robe enhancing her movements as it flowed around her, the short, just barely there purple silk baby doll nightgown shifting up her body as she walked, giving Kaito glimpses of her upper thighs.

Kaito swallowed and toed off his shoes before moving closer to his wife, wrapping an arm around her waist, smiling down at her. "I'm going to have to come home earlier if this is my reward," he said, smiling as he bent down and stole a kiss from her lips, tasting her lipstick on his tounge before he pulled away.

"That would be nice," she said with a grin, wrapping her arms around his neck. "I want to play a game, lover."

"Oh?" he tilted his head, hands sliding up and down her back, feeling the heat of her body through the silk. "And what sort of game is that, princess?"

She giggled and slipped away, taking his hand and pulling him towards the den where she had already set up the 'game'.

A wooden chair sat in the middle of the den, a table next to it. All the other furniture had been pushed back, and a large sheet of white plastic covered the floor. On the low table, rested a set of silver handcuffs, two of Kaito's neckties, a blindfold, a feather, a belt, a bowl of fruit, a jar of body paint, a jar of Vaseline, and a bowl of ice cubes.

Kaito blinked at his wife before stripping naked and taking a seat in the chair when she requested it of him, allowing her to cuff him to the chair, swallowing as she tied his his feet to the legs, blindfold easily slipping over his eyes. "Aoko?"

"Relax, baby, this is a simple guessing game. I'll run something over your body and all you have to do is tell me what it is."

"And what do I win if I guess correctly."

"You'll have to find out." she said, licking her lips as she studied her husband's naked body before selecting the feather from the table, lightly running it over Kaito's back, moving around to brush it up under his chin then down the center of his chest.

Kaito groaned softly, muscles twitching under his skin as the feather caressed his flesh, the tickling sensation causing goosebumps to appear on his skin. "Feather," he muttered, trying to keep his body from instinctively jerking away from the touch as she neared his stomach.

"Correct," Aoko said and allowed her sheer robe to fall, landing on Kaito's bare feet. The feet wiggled and he grinned, licking his lips.

"Wonder how much you're actually wearing, princess."

"You'll have to find out," she teased, selecting a peeled peach from the bowl of fruit. She cut off a slice, brushing the fruit over one of Kaito's nipples, before wrapping her mouth around it, sucking softly.

Kaito groaned deeply, his head falling back, arms twitching as they reached, wanting to hold Aoko's head. She lifted her head, licking her lips before sliding the piece of fruit up towards Kaito's lips. "Got a guess yet, lover?"

The smell of the fruit invaded Kaito's nose, and with his eyes closed and blindfolded, he could focus purely on that smell, matching it up with what he knew. "Peach," he whispered and was rewarded with the piece of fruit sliding between his lips, followed by Aoko's tounge as she kissed him. He moaned, kissing her back eagerly, the fruit dying a slow death between them.

Aoko pulled away when the fruit disappeared down Kaito's throat, her hands sliding down his body, tounge following, licking up the last few droplets of peach juice before she stood and pulled off the baby doll nightie, dropping it on Kaito's head.

Kaito smirked under the silk, shaking his head to remove the night gown, even though he knew he wouldn't be able to see his wife. Concentrating such as he was on what he could imagine of his wife's body, he was startled as a cold ice cube slid down his back, trailing around to his chest, easily sliding down his heated skin, over his stomach and even further still.

"Aoko...ice...oh fuck..." he groaned, and was rewarded by his wife slipping the ice cube in her mouth, before wrapping her mouth around him, sucking contentedly, the contrasting heat and ice driving him insane. "Oh gods," he groaned, trying to push up into her mouth.

She pulled away at that, swallowing the remains of the ice cube, chiding him. "Ready for your next, lover?"

"Yes please," he whispered, giving a pathetic whimper as he felt her nude body sliding up his, wanting desperately to touch it, feel it against his as he moved inside her. "Please, Aoko."

"As you wish," she whispered, straddling his lap and brushing her lips over his, kissing him deeply before standing, making sure her breasts touched his lips.

She grabbed a small bundle from the floor and un-wrapped it, baring a sharp butcher knife. Grasping the handle she moved around Kaito, before plunging the knife into his back. As he husband screamed, she pulled the knife free of his back and stabbed again, repeating the action over and over until her husband went silent, until blood splattered over her body, staining her skin, until the last breath rattled out of the cut in his throat.

She dropped the knife, grabbing the terry cloth robe she had wrapped the knife in and pulled in on her body, tying it loosely before moving into the kitchen. She poured herself a glass of scotch, sipping it as she stared at her reflection in the dark window, hair a disaster, face and chest splattered with warm, rich blood.

She turned away from the sight and pulled the phone from the wall, dialing the number for emergency dispatch, still dipping her drink as she waited for the call to be answered. "Yes, my husband was just stabbed, I think he's dead." she said calmly, giving the information for her house before hanging up on the operator, crossing over to the couch and taking a seat, waiting.

She was still there when the paramedics carried Kaito's body out, the plastic sheet covering him a weak shield against what everyone would know lay under. She set her glass aside as the detectives came back out of the den and smiled as they arrested her, easily assisting them as they handcuffed her, smiling fading at Saguru entered the house.

"Have fun tonight?" she asked softly as she was lead past, before raising her head, looking straight ahead, not caring about the neighbors staring at her, or the pain filled eyes of those behind her.


	14. Trepidation

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Let the fear take you.

**Trepidation**

_I don't remember what was going through my mind, but what was going through my body was fear and terror. - John Abercrombie_

It was very hard, looking back, to know if it had all happened at once or if time had slowed down, so that each moment was given the crystal clear perfection it deserved. There had been screams, he could remember that. Screams of joy, of euphoric rapture, and screams of pure, unadulterated horror.

There had been blood, staining the pure, virgin white, seeping slowly, ever so slowly down the curve of a temple, dripping over the edge of a jaw.

And there had been silence. An endless, silent moment as the figure turned to him, reaching out, desperation and terror in his eyes...before falling, tumbling backwards into the night's embrace.

And there had been fear.

It flooded all of them, pushing them forward, some leaning over the edge, some racing down the stairs, others running for the fountain where the crumpled body lay, punctured through by the cross pointing towards the heavens.

A part of Saguru wondered at the beauty of Kid, crumpled, bleeding...dying, on the holy cross of St. Mary's Cathedral of Beika.

But the fear over powered the awe and he stood, frozen, watching as the cross was cut down, as the paramedics came, as the blanket covered the crimson stained body. As a mustached man released him, shoving him down towards the ground, finished with his prey.

As a man in a cream coloured trench coat raised his gun, centering the sight on Saguru's forehead.

The terror finally left, as oblivion claimed him, his body left crumpled on the roof, forgotten in the chaos.


	15. Crimson Stains

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> I would give you my heart, but if that's not enough, how about someone else's?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Gore

**Crimson Stains**

_How is one to live a moral and compassionate existence when one is fully aware of the blood, the horror inherent in life, when one finds darkness not only in one's culture but within oneself?_

_-Barry Lopez_

His fingers slowly slid down the pale, bared skin before him, dipping down and across the planes and valleys that made up the boy's chest. A flashing smile before a tounge lowered, tracing the path a droplet of sweat had taken over the shivering skin, curling up around a nibble, lapping at it before pulling away, allowing the fan to cool it as it passed over the nude body.

He smiled again, watching as the body beneath his shivered, the cold air over his summer heated skin causing him to arch slightly, moaning and whimpering. He leaned back from the writhing body, digging into a bowl on the nightstand, fishing out a cold, oblong shaped object before slipping it into his mouth, rotating it around the hot confines before leaning down again, and taking the neglected nipple into his mouth, enjoying the startled curse that came as the ice and cooled mouth wrapped around flesh.

Hands were in his hair, pulling, tugging viciously at the blond strands, though he wasn't sure if the owner of the hands wanted him to stop or to continue, and frankly didn't care. He continued sucking, reaching up to pull the hands away from his hair and pushing them up against the bed, using his larger strength to hold them there, golden brown eyes rolling up to give a silent warning as he gave a harsh nip to the flesh in his mouth.

His partner moaned, struggling against the bindings on his wrist, before giving up as Saguru's nails dug into his flesh. Once Saguru was sure that his partner would not move, he lowered his hands, sliding them down the bare chest as his mouth slowly followed, kissing, licking and nibbling at the flesh.

He sat back on his heels again, resting his arms on the man's thighs, head tilted as he studied the body beneath his. Closing his eyes for a moment, he centered himself before leaning in for a hungry kiss, lifting the man's legs over his shoulder as his hand slipped down between his legs.

"Kaito, get the door!"

"Yes, mom." Kaito muttered, glancing up from the tangle of wires on the workbench before him, as if he could see the woman through the several walls and doors that separated them, before extracting his hands from the various cables. "Don't move," he ordered them, as if electrical wires had a tendency to go running off the moment someone turned their back.

He yawned, stretching as he headed downstairs, flicking the switch that allowed him through the double door of the work room, and into the downstairs den. Making sure the door was securely closed behind him, he shuffled for the front door, peeking in at his mother in the kitchen, grinning as he saw the amount of chocolate chips going into the cookie batter, before continuing his path for the door.

Yawning again, he pulled it open, blinking when nothing met his gaze. Then his nose wrinkled, as a distinctive smell reached his nose and he looked down, backing away from the spreading blood stain that was heading for his white house slippers.

The blood was seeping merrily from a plain, cardboard box, whose only identifying mark was his name written in hurried characters. He grimaced and glanced around the porch and street, hoping that he would either see something that would give away why he had a bloody box on his doorstep, or that no one else saw the bloody box on his doorstep.

He wondered, briefly, if he should just leave it and call the police like anyone sane would, but curiosity was bubbling up in him. He reached out and toed the box, before glancing around again. He headed back into the house and grabbed a handful of dishtowels, returning to the porch and grabbing the box, carrying it, quickly, into the bathroom, setting the bloody box in the tub before going to clean up whatever droplets strayed as he ran through the house.

"Kaito? Oh dear gods above!" Kaito's mother stared at the bloody towels and house slippers, before turning her gaze to the box, covering her nose with a hand. "What is that smell?"

"Blood and meat." Kaito answered. "Got a knife?"

She handed him the butcher's knife she had been using to cut up squid, gagging again at the smell and taking a few steps back. Kaito bit his lip before carefully slicing open the box, holding the un-stained corners as he did.

He set the knife aside and used a towel to carefully open the flaps of the box, peering inside. He then scrambled backwards, eyes wide, staring. His mother swayed, feeling faint, wanting to vomit as the smell of rotting meat and blood hit her in a heavier cloud.

Kaito took a deep breath to steel himself, and promptly regretted it. He vomited violently, barely making it over to the shower drain, which put him closer to the smell and the box then he would have otherwise chosen.

"Why?" His mother asked weakly, sliding down the wall, head resting between her knees as she took slow, careful breaths.

Kaito wiped his mouth on his sleeve, crawling over to her. He wrapped his arms around her body, resting his head on her shoulder, steading himself for a few minutes before carefully standing and helping his mother from the bathroom. Once his mother was safely tucked into bed with a bottle of sleeping pills and a stiff drink, Kaito headed downstairs to call the police.

"So you say it just appeared on your doorstep?"

Kaito nodded weakly, staring at the wall across from him, not looking at the homicide officer, mind swamped with images from the bathroom that refused to go away.

"Any idea why someone would send it to you?"

"I..." Kaito trailed off, trying to get his brain to function, trying to think of any reason why someone would send him such a package. "No, not really."

"Do you have any..." The next question was cut off as the front door burst open and a brunette whirlwind came charging in, followed by her father and Saguru.

"We just heard! Oh Kaito!" Aoko latched herself onto the brunette, clutching at him.

Kaito shivered in her embrace, before returning it, burring his head in Aoko's neck, trembling violently. Nakamori detoured over to the Inspector to find out what exactly was going on, while Saguru leaned against a wall, staring at the two on the couch, a silent guard.

Kaito regained his composure and lifted his head, running a hand over his face. He grimaced at the faint smell of blood, before frowning, realizing it didn't come from his hand. He swallowed, staring at the clean, soap smelling skin of his palm before leaning towards Aoko, breathing in deeply the scent of her perfume and shampoo.

Frowning more, he shifted his head slightly, following the smell of blood before looking up the long lines of Saguru's body, eyes finding and staring at the faint brown stains on the detective's jacket. Saguru lowered his gaze, meeting Kaito's eyes before turning away, heading towards the bathroom where the other police had gathered.

"Why?"

Saguru titled his head in question, but didn't actually ask, already knowing what the brunette behind him was referring to. "Do you know how easy it is, to distract a man, with a few words and touches?" he said instead, a small quirk of a smile on his lips. "One of the oldest tricks in the book for thieves and scoundrels."

"Hakuba..."

Saguru sighed, hunching in on himself. He raised his hands, carefully, finger by finger pulling off his black leather gloves, staring at the flaky brown patches of dried blood staining them. "One hears interesting things when one is half drunk, sitting in a dark bar, trying their best to get completely smashed." Saguru said softly, flexing his hand, flakes of blood falling to the roof below. "Murder, rape, thievery...a full catalog of crime. In the darkness, your guard is lowered, you speak freely with drink and spill your secrets to the night."

Saguru slipped back on his gloves, shoving his hands into his pockets. "I always hated reptiles." he muttered, giving a shudder before turning to look at Kaito, his brown eyes haunted, shadowed. "You lost, Kaito."

"I...what?"

"You lost," Saguru said, shrugging. "That was the message they wanted to deliver. You lost. They found Pandora."

Kaito's eyes widened for a second before shutters closed over them, poker face in place. "I don't know what you mean."

Saguru gave a mirthless laugh, tears falling down his cheeks. "Even now, you play. Well then, perhaps I'll play...but not tonight." Saguru swallowed, trembling slightly. "They were going to kill you, not some simple little attempt at sniping you, not a worthless meeting that you would easily vanish from. They were going to destroy you, and everything...everyone around you. Your mother, Jii, Aoko, the school, the station...all of it would be razed to the ground and the earth salted. I..." he paused, swallowing thickly. "Had the fortunate chance to listen as they planned it. I had to...I couldn't let them..." Saguru closed his eyes in pain and Kaito moved closer to the blond.

Saguru opened his eyes, staring down at Kaito's worried and fear filled face, giving a small smile. He reached out and brushed his gloved thumb over Kaito's cheek, causing the boy to shudder, knowing what lay under the textured leather, the blood staining those pale hands.

"I couldn't lose you," Saguru whispered brokenly.

"W..." Kaito swallowed himself, closing his eyes as nausea threatened. "Whose heart was that."

"I don't know his name, called himself Snake...or Jackal...some weird and ugly creature."

Kaito gagged, gripping Saguru's upper arms tightly. "You killed him." It wasn't a question, after all, very few people could live when their hearts had been cut out and placed in a cardboard box. "You killed him...for me."

"No one gets hurt. That's your motto. You would have died, trying to protect everyone, so yes, I killed him for you." Saguru said, and his voice was flat, devoid of emotion. He left it at that, not mentioning that there were still others out there, waiting for Kaito...waiting for Kid. Waiting to clip those glowing wings and watch the thief plummet to earth.

And as long as their were still shadows to destroy, Saguru's job wasn't finished.

Instead, he brushed his thumb over Kaito's cheek again, before leaning in, kissing him with tainted, poisoned lips, grasping for a moment at the light before he had to vanish into the darkness once more.

Jii watched as Kaito knotted the new black tie, carefully tucking it down between the lapels of his jacket, buttoning the single button that doubled as a sleeping gas capsule. He took a breath, sliding his monocle into place, before centering himself, preparing for the night ahead.

"Do you think he'll show?" Akako said softly from Jii's side, watching the man in front of her, feeling the grief rolling off of him in waves.

"Where Kid shines, the shadows follow, and where go the shadows, goes the golden knight." Jii said, nodding. "He'll be here, if he's not already."

"Show time," Kaito muttered and took off running, leaping from the building. As he fell, reaching inside his jacket for the remote control to his hanglider, he saw a flash of blond from the corner of his eye. Looking, he watched as Saguru down the sidewalk, heading intently for a blond woman standing in the crowd.

Turning from the sight, Kaito allowed the winds to take him away, not wanting to see, to remember...not wanting to know that when the night ended, when their bodies joined, another set of blood stains would mar Saguru skin.


	16. Someone Else's Story

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Is it really you, or is it another name and face?

**Someone Else's Story**

_Long ago_  
In someone else's lifetime  
Someone with my name  
Who looked a lot like me 

It wasn't that hard to confuse him for someone else, he was a master at tricking you into believing he was someone entirely different then who he really was. But those were times when he did it intentionally, when he forced your mind away from what it knew and into a completely different track of accepting the lie he so carefully performed for you.

This...this was not a performance.

This was a nightmare.

"It's been a long time, Toichi."

He swallowed, not looking at the man behind him, those shadowed blue eyes burning into mine. "Not long enough, Snake." His voice was cool, even, in-spite of the gun pressed uncomfortably close to his head.

"Drop the gun and raise your hands!" Both stared at me as if I had lost my mind, which I was starting to question myself. After dealing with him so long, it wasn't that hard to believe that some of his insanity had rubbed off on me.

"Who is your little friend?"

His eyes flickered to the side before returning to me, and I could see the wheels turning over in his mind. I doubted that even that madly brilliant brain could come up with something to make the gun imprinting his scalp vanish. "Inspector Hakuba, Investigative Group Two."

"Hakuba, huh? Isn't he your son's lover?"

Son? Guess that would go with the whole 'Toichi' thing, honestly, this man was an idiot.

"He is..."

"Wonder how much it would hurt, to lose not only a father, but a lover as well."

Okay first of all, get AWAY from his ear. My ear. Second of all, HELL NO.

"I won't tell you again, drop the gun and put your hands in the air!"

"And just what will you do if I don't, Inspector Hakuba? Can you fire that pretty little revolver before I blow his brains all over you?"

He was staring at me again, a desperate plea in his eyes. I had no idea what he was begging for, no idea which way to move. "Release him." God I hated the desperate note in my own voice.

The man shifted the gun, pressing it harder against his head, causing him to wince, those beautiful eyes closing as the gun pressed to his head was cocked, the un-necessary sound loud in the silence. I swallowed, raising my own weapon higher, sighting down the sight on the barrel, trying to focus on the man's head and not his.

His eyes opened, staring at me again, and I had to smile as his mouth opened, forming the words 'good.." I wasn't about to let him finish. My gun fire and he crumbled, cursing as he clutched his bloody thigh. The man's gun fire a split second after mine and fire erupted from my face. Forcing the fiery pain from my mind, I shifted my gun again, preparing to fire another shot when someone beat me, a bullet slicing easily through the man's head, dropping the giant.

Stumbling, gun sliding from my hand, I moved towards him, falling to my knees before I made it even two steps. He instead crawled to me, dragging his damaged leg behind him. He cradled my jaw in his hands, staring at me. At least, I think he was staring at me. The vision from my right eye was gone, and the left wasn't much better. "Kaito..."

"Shh, where's your radio?"

"P..p..." The words wouldn't come out, slurring.

"I've already called, the ambulance is on it's way."

"Aoko..."

A blurry shape knelt next to us and my head turned into a new set of hands. Something gentle brushed my cheek and the pain exploded again, my vision vanishing completely as darkness claimed me.

He survived long enough to have the bullet removed from the back of his neck. Long enough for me to hold his hand as he died. I was the only one there with him, no one else had made it in time. I had to tell his parents he had died.

He was buried with all the honors he deserved, or so I heard, I didn't attend the funeral, I was still in the hospital, infection from the wound he gave me. Aoko said it was beautiful...like him.

It's the first time visiting his grave. I can't tell if the urge to vomit is from grief or from the pain in my leg. He would laugh and tell it me it was probably from the three bags of chocolate kisses I ate this morning...if he were here.

There's a crunch of gravel behind me and I turned, staring at the beautiful blond woman approaching. She's every bit the grieving widow, from her perfect black suit to the hat and veil over her face. I would buy it, if I had ever seen her before in my life. She's not here to grieve, she's here to see Saguru...or myself.

It's not the first time, I wished I could take a step back easily on these damn crutches. But this isn't like avoiding Aoko's hugs, this is a sense of danger screaming in my brain. She pauses next to me, staring down at the headstone, a gloved hand coming up to dab at her non-existent tears with a lacy handkerchief. She knelt, laying something at the bottom of the headstone before standing and turning to leave.

"Why are you here?" I had to ask, the curiosity burning in my throat.

She stopped and turned her head, looking at me over the corner of her shoulder. "You did us a favor, we do like to return it."

"I didn't do anything, but lost him. Someone else killed Snake."

"But your events set it in motion, Kuroba Kaito. Enjoy your peace...while you can."

"Do you enjoy playing with people, Vermouth?"

She smiled, a flash of white on red, before turning back to the black car waiting for her. "Quite."

I watched her go, watched until that black car had vanished and the dust was settling in it's wake. It wasn't until everything was calm and peaceful before I turned around again, ready to say my final good-byes...only to find a small brown leather case resting on the grave, wrapped in a delicate gold chain.

Kneeling carefully I picked up the leather case and with difficulty, un-wound the chain from the case and opened it, staring at the carefully written notes, addresses and photos pasted into the journal. Eyes widening, a slow smile spread across my face as I flipped through the pages. "Tantei-kun's going to flip out..."


	17. Beautiful Death of Roses

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Saguru reflects on what is lost.

**Beautiful Death of Roses**

" _One day your life will flash before your eyes. Make sure its worth watching." -Unknown_

_Snip_

My mother's favorite perfume is a distilled peppermint and chocolate essence...she always reminded me of winter with that scent.

_Snip_

Her favorite song is Elvis Presley's "Return to Sender", dad bought her a single of it when they were dating and she always plays it on the record player when he's away.

_Snip_

Her favorite food is roast duck with apples and prunes, but she will only eat it from a specific resterant that has been out of business for five years...I finally tracked down the chef and got the recipe for Baaya a year ago.

_Snip_

Her favorite animal is the giraffe. She has giraffe slipper, giraffe statuettes, stuffed giraffe's, glass giraffe's, large giraffe's, small giraffe's, giraffe's for the office, giraffe's to wear...she even has a giraffe dinner set we use for 'African theme nights'.

_Snip_

My mother's favorite movie is "Breakfast at Tiffany's" with Audry Hepburn. We watch that movie every Sunday, right after dad church, before dad watches "The Jack of Diamonds" and I get to see my Sherlock Holmes DVD's.

_Snip_

My mother's favorite actress is an American named Lucille Ball. She met her once at a charity event in London and gushed like a school girl from what I hear. We have an autographed picture in the parlour. Her favorite actor is Jonathon Morris.

_Snip_

She prefers the colour green over anything, is rather fond of pink though she won't say why, wore baby blue on her wedding day, and detests the colour brown. Her private study is done entirely in peach and white tones, which makes one feel as if they're in the center of a creamcicle.

_Snip_

She wanted to be an astronaut as a child, a doctor when she is in school, and always dreamed of being a writer of some acclaim...she is a mother, teacher, lover, wife, confidant, punisher, and one of the most brilliant painters I know.

_Snip_

My mother is formally, The Viscountess of Newkirk. We are related to the royal family via Lady Spencer and several degrees of birth and marriage that I can never remember, as mother always remembered the family tree better then anyone else. Informally, she is simply called Effie.

_Snip_

My mother loves roses, more then anything else. They were her passion, her hobby, her...they were her first child, her first lover. She grows acres of them, all across the left hillside of our manor house in England. Rows of perfect, beautiful blooms of every colour she could get her hands on. English roses, American roses, Japanese roses, any nationality and breed, so long as they'll grow, she has them.

_Snip_

My mother died, a week ago. She was buried in the family cemetery next to her brother who died in the army and her father who was killed in an auto accident.

_Snip_

Saguru stared at the last red rose bloom on the last bush in the rose garden. Sweat slipped down his arm, traveling into the gardening glove on his hand, curling around his finger before being absorbed by the thick leather. The smell of roses was thick, cloying to his senses, causing his mind to fade from reality to past and back again...or maybe that was the heat, it was an unbearably hot day, to be standing outside without shade.

He licked his lip, tasting blood from when another bush had attempted a brutal attack on his face before being cut into submission with the rusting, dulled gardening shears now clutched in his right hand. He swallowed, reaching out to gently grip the rosebud, just below it's sepal, gloved thumb gently brushing over the bulbed end that would become the hip before placing the edge of the sheers gently against the still golden green stem.

He closed his eyes, closing his hand and listening to the sound of the sheers slicing through the living plant, the bud of the rose gently hitting leaves and stems alike as it fell, landing with the softest of sounds at his feet.

He allowed his eyes to open, staring at the empty stem before him, before turning and examining the sea of similarly empty bushes surrounding him, their roots bathed in a shower of rainbow buds. He allowed the sheers to drop from his hands into the grass as he headed back for the house, gloves discarded along the way, ending up half buried in a pile of white rose buds.

He trod carelessly over each bloom in his path, their crushed scent filling the air, teasing his nose as he passed, getting their sweet revenge for his torture. He kicked his shoes off carelessly on the porch steps, eager to rid himself of the oils from the damaged petals, stripping off his shirt as he headed for the laundry, streaks of water making tracks on his burnt, dirty cheeks.

He tossed his clothes in the pile of laundry to be washed, grabbing his father's dressing gown as he headed to the library, closing and locking the doors behind him. He grabbed a full decanter of scotch and a glass, pulling the curtain cords as he passed to close the drapes, blocking out the sun and the garden from view, decorating the room in darkness.

Taking a seat at the large, mahogany desk that decorated the far wall, he poured himself a full glass of the amber liquid, raising it in a silent toast before taking a sip, and finally, giving himself over to the tears that were already decorating his face.

_My mother, loved roses more then anything. She especially loved receiving them as a surprise from father. That's why, when she opened the door to her death, she never thought an assassin's gun could be hidden beneath the tender blooms laid out so perfectly in their box._

_My mother...loved roses. And now..._

_I can't stand a single one._


	18. Decorus

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> And it all falls apart...

**Decorus**

" _He has honor if he holds himself to an ideal of conduct though it is inconvenient, unprofitable, or dangerous to do so." -Walter Lippmann_

Saguru licked his lips, the biting cold wind drying them out before he had even completed the motion. His nose twitched, the thick scent of oil and gunpowder tickling the sensitive nerves, forcing him to suppress the violent urge to sneeze. A soft breath escaped him as he felt the cold metal of the small caliber handgun pressing harder against the flesh of his temple and he stilled his body even further, desperate to keep even the smallest of twitches from occurring, even though the harder he tried, the more he trembled.

He turned his focus from his body to the man across from him, barely twelve feet away, though that snow covered distance had never seemed further the in this moment. The wind kicked up again, sending up a mourning cry, blowing soft flakes of snow across the space between the men, blocking out Saguru's focus for a second before the man came back into sight, cape moving gracefully in the wind.

Swallowing thickly, Saguru's eyes darted to the side, seeing a hint of the man behind him, mostly a hand and an arm connected to a black trench coat, the search lights from the museum in the building next to them playing off the dull material, illuminating it for a moment before they vanished again, still searching fruitlessly for a vanished phantom.

There was a movement to his other side and Saguru's eyes shifted, watching the man's free hand as it gestured in the air, punctuating words the blond no longer heard. Saguru hadn't heard anything for the past several minutes, having gotten a bit too close when all hell broke loose from a mis-timed trick of Kid's.

He could feel the man behind him take a breath, pausing in his words and then it was expelled in a rush over Saguru's head, ruffling his hair as the man spoke with such force that droplets of spit hit Saguru's bare neck. In between one blink and the next, Kid's poker face cracked, the thief's eyes widening as his attention turned from the man behind Saguru to Saguru himself, those shadowed blue orbs staring hard into the detective's, as if communicating some forbidden message.

Saguru rotated his jaw, a fine ache starting from his temple down his cheek and into his neck from holding his head oh so perfectly still, pressed tightly against the muzzle of the gun. His right index finger twitched and he slowly curled it against his palm, followed by the rest of his finger, before relaxing them, trying to keep the movements slow and even.

His attention once more turned outward as Kid moved, reaching ever so slowly into his white suit jacket, carefully removing the target of the night, a shining mass of diamonds and rubies whose name escaped the detective at the moment.

Kid opened his gloved hand slightly, the necklace hooked on one finger, dangling over the snow, swaying in the wind. Saguru watched as Kid's mouth moved, and he shifted his mouth, almost trying to follow the thief's movements before giving up, instead focusing again on his body, trying to keep the now more constant shivering from jerking his body around.

As he got his body back under his control, mostly by clenching his teeth and stiffening his body as best he could, he started cataloging the man behind him again, staring with the basics, feel, sight, smell, doing his best to remember everything he could, despite the fact he was facing away from the man and only had the barest of clues to go by.

A flicker of light, and Saguru was distracted from his role as detective, eyes fastening on the falling sparkle of gems. He was temporarily struck by the poetic beauty of the moonlight reflecting off the flawless stones before they vanished into the snow drift at Kid's feet. There was a sudden sharp rush of air and Kid jerked, clutching at his chest.

Saguru blinked, a moment of curious stupidity hitting him before horror burned it away, watching as a crimson stain spread from under the thief's gloved hand, soaking into the cotton of the thief's jacket, spreading quickly across the once pristine fabric.

He felt a hand against his back, before he was suddenly face down on the snow covered roof, closer to Kid then he had been most of the night. Kid lay there, gasping like a fish, staring at Saguru, one arm thrown out as if reaching for the blond, the other still clutching at his chest, a rather comical attempt at stopping his very life from flowing from the wound.

Saguru pushed himself to his knees, ignoring the biting cold as snow melted against his heated body, soaking into the knees of his pants as he pushed himself across the roof towards the thief, reaching out for that grasping hand. Saguru's mouth moved, trying to speak, to take away that desperate, haunted look from Kid's face, though he doubted words were actually leaving his lips.

There was a flicker in the air, a horn honking, men shouting, then silence again. Saguru clutched at the hand he finally managed to grasp, using it as an anchor to pull himself even closer, one hand resting over the thief's on the bloody chest, pressing down, desperation clinging to him as he watch the stain spread even further.

"...sorry...couldn't..."

Saguru shook his head, an almost violent jerk, not understanding, not wanting to hear, not willing to listen.

Kid's hand clenched around Saguru's and a look of pure pain crossed the thief's face, body jerking with a cough, blood staining a too pale face. "...Pandora...no one gets hurt...can't..."

"Shut up," Saguru whispered, barely hearing his own words, clutching tightly at Kid's hand, his grip tightening even more as warmth started to leak from the hand, Kid's own grip failing. "Shut up, shut up, shut up, shut up..."

"...die..." Kid whispered brokenly, eyes shifting up, looking up at Saguru. There was an explosion of sound around Saguru, the cops on the street, the choppers in the air, the crowds, the wind, the very city, all coming back into to sharp of a focus as another gunshot sounded, Kid's head jerking sightly, life fading from those dull eyes.

Saguru swallowed, bile burning against his throat as he stared into those eyes. He could hear the crunch of snow as Kid's assassin approached and he closed his eyes, lowering his head. His hand slipped from Kid's lax one, drifting down the thief's side, slipping into the dead man's jacket.

It was a smooth motion, pulling as he rose, turning before the gun was fully raised, finger already pressing down on the trigger. Three cards sliced through the night, whistling as they cut through the particles that made up the air before cutting into flesh with hardly a sound beyond the startled gasp from the trench coated figure.

Saguru kept the card gun focused on the man as he stepped closer, not even pausing as he spit out the mouthful of acid that had gathered against his tongue, instead swooping down and picking up the man's fallen gun. He swallowed again, coughing against the burn, dropping one gun in favor of the other, not even giving the man more then the barest of moments to realize what Saguru was doing before he fire, repeatedly pulling the trigger, not even stopping as the gun started to click, empty of bullets, spent and useless.

Saguru finally collapsed, still firing the now worthless gun, body trembling, hands jerking all over the place, tears streaming down his cheeks, falling onto his knees to mix with the snow and blood.


	19. Anesidora

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> The truth of Pandora.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Vampyre Alert.

**Anesidora**

_Bottom line is, even if you see them coming, you're not ready for the big moments. No one asks for their life to change, not really. But it does. So, what are we, helpless? Puppets? Nah. The big moments are gonna come, you can't help that. It's what you do afterwards that counts. That's when you find out who you are. -Whistler (Buffy the Vampire Slayer: Becoming pt. I)_

It was known as the 'house on haunted hill', though that wasn't it's official name (after all, who would name it that?). But that was still the name everyone knew it by, and it was that name he used in his note.

Kaito had selected the location out of amusement, overhearing the task force talking about some of the 'creepier' places Kid had held heists. The house had been a local feature in ghost stories since his parent's were children and it just _had_ to be done, after all, he was always looking to top himself.

Or at least, that was his thinking two hours ago.

Now, he simply...wasn't thinking. His actions were automatic, each twist and jump a muscle memory after two years of the same dance with the same members of the task force. It was routine...it was normal.

He cursed under his breath as he darted around another officer, causing the man to go flying into a team mate after failing to catch the thief, and he glanced around, realizing he backed himself into a corner. Thinking quickly, he shoved the marble sized diamond into his mouth, reaching above him and firing off a suction cupped rope, raising himself into the air just as two officers collided where he had been.

Grinning, he raised a hand to spit out the gem when suddenly the lights went out and a scream sounded. Startled from the un-expected sound, he swallowed reflectively and started to choke, grasping his throat as the gem got stuck, muscles working desperately to either cough up the gem or finish swallowing.

By the time the lights were restored, Kaito was on the ground, having lost his grip on the rope, hand still clutching at his throat, staring wide-eyed at nothing anyone could see as he realized he had completely swallowed the gem he had been in the process of stealing.

Standing shakily, he glanced at the confused officers around him before simply running, dashing for the nearest window, throwing himself through the glass and rolling across the grass before stumbling to his feet, heading for the waiting car.

It wasn't until much later, after the costumes had been put away, after showers and dinner, that Kaito realized something wasn't quite right, beyond the whole swallowing of stolen goods. He grunted softly as he climbed up the stairs to his bedroom, rubbing his stomach absently, feeling the tossing and turning of nausea a bit distracting from his plotting of how to return the purloined gem once it was...returned to his possession.

Laying down on his bed, he grabbed a pillow, rolling over onto it, hoping the slight pressure would ease his stomach, yawning deeply as his eyes started to drift shut. Only to be greeted with pain shooting through his stomach and lower abdomen.

Deep inside Kaito's stomach, as the boy thrashed and groaned in pain, a small diamond rolled it's way up the side of Kaito's stomach wall, before cracking, a small, sickly green vine wiggled it's way out of the crack, searching, hungry.

The vine curled, pushing it's way up the wall of Kaito's stomach before suddenly darting, pushing through tissue and muscle, seeking nourishment it knew was resting just out of reach. Another vine followed, and again another, until the small, broken gemstone was resting snug against the side of Kaito's stomach, happily pulsing as it drank from it's host, absorbing the sweet nectar it hadn't tasted in centuries.

As for the host himself, he was screaming, clutching at his abused stomach, mouth open wide as he panted between cries. Pain erupted in his mouth, tendrils of vine curling and twisting as they spilled free of his gums, wrapping around his teeth, before retreating back, loosening the roots of Kaito's canine teeth, pushing against them, almost removing the teeth completely before a yellow sap leaked from the vines, healing the wounds left by their exploration.

Those same tendrils then retreated to the boy's saliva glands, resting happily in their new home, the sap they extruded mixing with the saliva, causing a thick, bitter liquid to be released every time Kaito swallowed.

Kaito's eyes rolled back, whites brightly visible as he panted, tears streaming down his cheeks, body heaving with each urge to vomit, before blissful darkness finally claimed him, pulling him from his misery.

It was the slow, steady ticking that drew Kaito from his pleasurable darkness. Blinking, he groaned, eyes slowly slitting before opening, staring at the man across from him. As recognition settled in, the teenager found himself halfway up a wall, using his bed post and the dresser to hold himself up in his attempt to escape the figure. "D-dad?" he gasped out, and cursed as his newly lengthened teeth sliced his lip.

Toichi looked up from the swinging pocket watch, smiling softly. "Been a while, eh kiddo?" he asked, making the pocket watch disappear. The magician stood and Kaito realized that his father looked a bit...washed out, almost as if Toichi was a television channel not coming in cleanly.

"This is a dream...I'm still asleep," Kaito muttered, managing to get down the wall and back into the bed without taking his eyes off of his father. "Yup, dreaming...dunno why I'm dreaming but I am." He promptly rolled over and pulled the covers over his head.

"Kaito..."

"Ig-noring," Kaito muttered, attempting to block out the sound of his father's voice, humming softly and sticking his fingers in his ears, wincing slightly at the aches still rolling through his body. His stomach growled as he blocked out the outside world and he frowned, lifting an elbow enough to peek out of the blankets before sighing and removing his fingers from his ears, heading downstairs to grab something to eat, still ignoring the man walking soundlessly behind him.

"Food, food, food," he sung to himself, opening the fridge and peering inside, attempting to find something that appealed to his hunger. "Food, food, food...ooo, pizza!" He grabbed the box and opened it as he kicked the door shut behind him, setting the box on the counter and taking a large bite from the slice, making happy sounds as the slice.

He started to gag after the first swallow, setting the slice down and grabbing a glass, filling it with water to try to wash down the rest of the bite, staring at the slice of pizza, wondering how it went bad in a night. He set the glass on the counter, just in time to lean over the sink, vomiting the bite of pizza as well as whatever else was in his stomach into it. He gagged softly, squeezing his eyes shut against the pain in his stomach. Resting on the edge of the sink he tipped the pizza and box into the trash, groaning softly.

"Are you alright, Kaito?" Toichi asked, reaching out for his son before remembering he couldn't actually touch the boy.

"Ugh," Kaito muttered before pushing himself up and staring into the fridge, stomach now even hungrier then before. "Okay, pizza bad, let's see..." He hummed before his eyes fastened on a wrapped slab of beef, the fresh meat the most beautiful sight he had seen since he last broke into the girl's locker room.

He grabbed the steak, checking the date on it before ripping into it, shoving it into his mouth, not even realizing he was eating the meat raw, too consumed with the sweet, tender juices hitting his tongue, a blissful expression crossing his face as the ambrosia slid down to his starving stomach.

"Er...Kaito..." Toichi said, blinking as his sun sucked on the meat, slightly grossed out.

Kaito cracked open one eye in reply before returning to his ignoring, spitting out the piece of steak he had been sucking on before ripping another piece off with his teeth, sucking away at it, groaning in pleasure.

"Kaito...it's not a lollipop," Toichi muttered, wrinkling his nose in disgust and looking away.

"Hmm?" Kaito muttered around his mouthful, opening an eye again in question. Toichi waved at the raw steak in Kaito's hand and Kaito blinked down at it, before sending the piece in his mouth flying across the room and through his father. "What the hell am I doing?"

"That was my question..." Toichi said, not looking fazed he had just been spit at.

"But it tasted so good," Kaito mumbled, staring hungrily at the steak still clutched in his hands before tossing it in the trash. "What is wrong with me?"

"Perhaps you're ill...though I am unsure what sort of illness would have you craving raw steak."

Kaito snorted, rinsing his mouth out before heading for the stairs, intent on sleeping again and waking up from this bizarre dream. "Perhaps I've contracted lycanthropy," he muttered.

He was burning, heat tearing at his skin just as the hunger clawed at his body. Growling he pushed away from the crowd, eager to put the mass of flesh and beating hearts behind him, hair sticking to his face from the sweat dripping down his face. Everywhere he looked was another stranger, another warm body to slide up next to, the rhythmic pulses of their blood flowing through veins taunting him as the sound rushed across his ears, forcing him to lick his lips, eyes eagerly trained to wrists and neck, where the veins were often most visible through thin skin, faint blue traces, easy track lines for the waiting junkie.

Swallowing thickly, Kaito wrapped his arms around his body, shivering as someone passed too close to him, close enough he could smell their skin, their soft...creamy...

He hissed, wrapping his arms tighter around him, heading towards the subway, eager to get away, to get...somewhere. The smells were thick and cloying, causing nausea to churn in his stomach along with the hunger, each pulse from his stomach sending his mind reeling between wanting to be sick and wanting to rip into the next person he passed, eager to absorb teasing vital fluid anyway possible.

He was so hungry...

"Kaito!"

A voice called behind him and he turned, eyes latching onto Aoko who was waving at him, a grin splitting her face. The grin faltered as she got a good look at the wild-eyed, shivering teen and she started to look concerned. "Kaito?"

He turned, walking away from her, speeding up as he heard her follow. He started to run, shoving people out of his way, desperate for escape., hunger fading under his panic. He couldn't...not Aoko, too close, too nice...too _good_. He wouldn't...it wouldn't be right...he wasn't right...he was going insane and Aoko...

He slammed into a body as he turned yet another corner, sending both him and his victim tumbling until they came to a rest in the shadows of an alley. Blinking, arms trembling he pushed himself up, a flash of gold catching his eye before the stranger had fully sat up.

"Figures," Saguru muttered, dusting off his jacket, glancing at Kaito. "Care to explain or is this something I'd be happier not knowing?"

Kaito could see Saguru's mouth moving, but couldn't hear him, the words white noise compared to the sight of a single blood drop slipping down Saguru's cheek from the small cut their fall had caused. He licked his lips, watching the droplet as it slid down Saguru's cheek, towards the curve of Saguru's jaw, hovering their, trembling as it prepared to fall.

Kaito's hand shot out, grabbing Saguru's jaw in a tight, bruising grip, capturing the blood drop on his thumb, ignoring the protesting blond as Kaito drew closer to Saguru, tongue darting out, licking his thumb. Pleasure once more exploded across his nerves as he tasted the blood and his stomach lurched, wanting more...eager for it, desperate.

Kaito crawled over Saguru, straddling the blond as he forced Saguru's head to the side, lapping at the cut, whimpering as nothing more slipped out. Saguru's protests started to invade the fog covering Kaito's brain and he growled, jerking Saguru's head around violently, sealing their lips together as he silenced the detective, new fangs slicing his and Saguru's lips as Kaito kissed the blond.

It was the beginning of the end when the blood hit his tongue. Kaito shoved the appendage into Saguru's mouth, lapping at the wounds and making fresh ones, whimpering as he tried to get more of the sweet taste.

He pulled away from Saguru, a trail of saliva linking their mouths, breaking only when Kaito once more jerked Saguru's head around, baring the detective's neck, finger trailing lightly over the flesh, finding the large vein that slid from brain to artery, licking his lips before lunching, fangs sinking happily into flesh.

He slipped his fangs free and moaned, spilling blood down his chin as his mouth filled with the nectar with each steady pump of Saguru's heart. He sucked hard, drawing more blood into his mouth, eagerly feeding the hungry beast that his stomach had become, shoving his fingers into Saguru's mouth when the boy started to cry out in pain, attempting again to keep him quiet.

He drank deeply from Saguru, not caring about what he was doing, who he was doing it to, or what result might come from his feast. He drank, nails scrambling at flesh, tearing the puncture wounds further when they started to clot, not pausing, breathing through his nose until he was forced away, vomiting blood on the cement, his stomach rejecting anymore. Panting, he leaned back on his hands, body still humming happily from the pleasing meal. As the hunger faded, his brain returned to higher function, focusing on more then primal reaction.

Raising a trembling hand, he brushed his sweaty bangs from his face and laid back, staring at the stars above, giggling softly, not even noticing the corpse next to him. Raising a hand he reached up, almost attempting to grab the stars before giggling again.

Toichi watched his son sadly, glancing at the young teen who was laying next to Kaito, sightless brown eyes staring up at the moon. Toichi then frowned, glancing around, wondering where the boy had gone. Since his death, Toichi had been around enough dead bodies with Kaito to know that the spirit lingered at least a day. Some, like himself, even longer. But the boy's spirit wasn't hanging around, wailing about the injustice of being murdered.

Toichi turned his attention back to the two boys, watching as Kaito came down a bit from his drunken high and realized there was a dead body next to him. He winced at Kaito's reaction, turning away from his son clutching at Saguru, attempting CPR, knowing already it was useless.

Toichi stared up at the moon, wondering what now...what else would his family have to go through before they could finally have peace. His attention turned back to Kaito as the teenager fumbled for his cellphone, trying to dial the police at the same time as he tried to resuscitate Saguru.

Toichi's eyes widened as a hand reached up, grabbing the cellphone and closing it, effectively ending the call. Saguru blinked at Kaito, silent for a moment before lowering his hand, staring at the blood stained thief. "You, have a lot of explaining to do."

"And now, we're back at the beginning," Kaito muttered, staring at the house in front of him.

"Best place to figure out what happened to you," Saguru said, nudging Kaito forward before ringing the bell.

The front door opened and a small woman opened the door, staring at them. She studied Saguru before looking at Kaito, stepping away from the door and gesturing for them to enter. "Please, come in."

The two boys entered, staring around at the darkened hallway before turning back to the woman who had closed the door, leaning heavily on it before turning to them. "You have come about Anesidora."

"Anesi..."

"We have," Saguru interrupted, and gestured to Kaito. "Something has occurred, since the last night we were here."

"Tell me, where is she?"

"She?" Kaito asked, confused.

"The gemstone, Anesidora."

"I...there was an accident and...well.."

"Where. Is. She?"

"I swallowed it...her"

The woman closed her eyes, as if physically in pain, before moving past the pair, taking a small gas lantern from a nook. "Follow me," she whispered and headed across the hall, opening what appeared to be a coat closet, only to reveal a set of stairs.

The threesome headed down into the bowls of the house, Kaito shivering the further they descended. Two more doors later, and the woman lead them into a large, underground room. She left the boys in the center as she moved around the earthen room, lighting lamps.

"This wasn't on the blueprints," Saguru mused, shoving his hands into his pockets.

"No, for no one knows of it, but myself and my husband. The house was built to cover it." the woman said, setting the last lit lamp on a small table before crossing over to the center of the room, where a slab of stone was now visible. "Come here."

The pair moved closer to the slab, blinking at the mess of ancient looking cloth on the top. "What is..." Kaito started before being silenced as the woman pulled on a tie and the bundle fell apart, revealing a long since mummified corpse.

It was a woman, strands of her long black hair still attached to her scalp. She was dressed simply, in a plain linen dress that must have once been white. Her arms were crossed over her stomach, resting just above where her belly button would be.

"She, was the original owner of Anesidora. The first to name her, the first to know the hunger."

"Who is she?" Saguru asked, staring at the corpse before looking at the woman in front of them, noticing faint similarities in bone structure.

"Long ago she was called Pandora, I have forgotten what name she died under. My mother had...many names."

"Your mother, but..."

"Pandora's tears can create immortality," Kaito whispered, reaching out a trembling hand, gently touching Pandora's leathered skin, his hand resting lightly over the corpse's. Closing his eyes, he felt as if he could touch her, feel her soft skin against his cheek, her tears staining his skin.

"Tears...so the legend says," the woman said, gazing sadly at her mother's body. "For me, it was her blood, it fell on my lips as her body covered mine, protecting me. For you..." She glanced at Saguru who closed his eyes in painful remembrance.

"Saliva...or sweat. Both were shared." Saguru whispered, truly realizing what had happened to him, besides just being a tasty dinner.

"How did she die, if the...tears...can make one immortal, couldn't the gem itself do the same?" Kaito asked.

"It does, for as long as the gem is inside you, you will live with it. My mother killed herself. She..." The woman coughed, clearing her throat, gaining control of her emotions. "My mother removed Anesidora from her body. I, and my brother found her laying on her bed, Anesidora clasped in her hand."

"How long have you been protecting the gem?" Toichi asked, and Kaito turned to stare at his father before noticing Saguru and the woman were also looking at the ghost. The teen whimpered, realizing he wasn't hallucinating if the other two could see the man as well.

"Two centuries, give or take. I'm...not good, with time." Toichi nodded, going silent again.

"Might I...might I be alone, for a moment?" Kaito whispered, his voice slightly broken. The woman nodded and headed for the stairs, Saguru following after a moment, taking a last glance at Kaito before he acceded the stairs after the woman.

Kaito knelt next to the body, resting his head lightly against the corpse's arm, squeezing his eyes shut. He felt a brush of cold air against his back and his eyes opened, staring up at his father's sad ones. "We found her," Kaito whispered before starting to cry.

"He will need support."

Saguru turned as the woman spoke, looking away from the painting he had been studying, blinking at her. "Excuse me?"

"Your friend," the woman clarified, taking a seat on the sofa, pouring two glasses of scotch. "He will need support, someone to talk to, someone to listen...someone to..." She licked his lips, taking a sip of scotch before looking up to meet Saguru's eyes. "Someone to feed from."

"You're certainly not suggesting that I..."

"Either you or someone else, and how long can someone last, someone _normal_ last against that hunger? You have already died to it, how many more, will he have to kill? How many more will you force him to kill?"

"But I..." Saguru went silent, turning away. He was silent, before finally whispering. "The very idea terrifies me. I'm not food."

"To him you are. He is no longer human, not in the ways that matter, and neither are you. Who will be there for you, Hakuba-san, when you fail to age, fail to get ill...fail to die? The only thing either of you have left, is the other. Twenty years from now, fifty...a hundred, he will still be there, a teenage boy, un-aged, immortal. Just as you will be."

Saguru grabbed the other glass of scotch, draining it in one go before collapsing into a chair. "This is too hard...it's too much."

"I know, believe me, I know. And you will have time to collapse...you have forever in fact, but this is something that can't be delayed. The hunger...it eats at you. I watched my mother be driven insane by it, by the blood left on her hands. Is that what you want for him, while you attempt to deal with eternity?"

"Of course not, but to become...how can I just allow someone to use me, to feed from me as if I was nothing more then an animal for the slaughter?"

"Perhaps I was wrong," she mused, staring at the ice in her glass as it shifted and clanked together. "I had thought, that there was a decent person, somewhere inside you." She sipped her drink before standing, silently leaving Saguru to his thoughts, heading downstairs to check on the other teenager.

Saguru watched her go before burring his face in his hand, wondering what to do.

Kaito tossed and turned in his bed, growling softly, kicking at the sheets, clawing at his skin, desperate to stop the hunger once more consuming him. It had been a week since he had met Tellus face to face and discovered the truth behind the myth of Pandora. A week since he had taken his first sip of human blood and discovered the bliss it contained.

He had tried to go on as normal, going to school during the day, and planning heists (now with Toichi's help) at night, but after three days he had given up. He stopped attending school, stopped talking with his deceased stalker, stopped doing anything but laying in bed, clawing at his skin until unconsciousness claimed him.

Saguru watched the teen from the door to the bedroom, watching as Kaito twisted and whimpered on the bed, Kaito flopping onto his stomach, laying heavily on his fist, hoping the pain would stop the constant ache in his empty stomach.

Sighing, Saguru slipped off his jacket, dropping it over a chair before entering the room, un-buttoning his shirt as he moved closer to the bed. "Kaito," he said softly, reaching out to shake the teen to attention, only to find himself suddenly jerked into bed, a fevered, starving vampire resting on his hips.

"Get out," Kaito hissed, fangs glinting in the fading light.

Saguru reached up, brushing his thumb over Kaito's lower lip before slipping the finger into Kaito's mouth, pressing up against one of the razor sharp teeth, hissing as it pierced his flesh, blood dripping into Kaito's mouth.

Kaito whimpered, eyes showing confusion before closing as Kaito wrapped his lips fully around the bleeding finger, sucking eagerly. Saguru had to smile at the look that only he got to see, the pleased, sated expression Kaito wore as he ate.

Kaito gave a whimper, his eyes opening again, silently begging and Saguru turned his head, revealing a long, pale column of skin to the magician. Kaito released Saguru's thumb, licking his lips before attacking, teeth sinking hungrily into Saguru's neck, his hand reaching up to hold Saguru's head to the side, drinking eagerly.

Saguru winced at the first flash of pain before reaching up and wrapping his arms around Kaito's body, gently rubbing Kaito's back as he was fed from, fingers pulling at the teen's shirt, freeing it from his pants before slipping under, exploring the skin warmed by the starving fever.

Kaito gave a needy whimper at the first touch of skin against his own, pulling free of the wound on Saguru's neck to lap at the skin around the puncture wounds, cleaning it up before diving in for another drink.

Saguru continued to stroke the cooling skin, smiling more as he heard Kaito give a hiccup as the boy drank too fast. Once the drinking started to slow, knowing Kaito was full, he pulled Kaito's mouth up, staring up at the un-focused blue eyes before leaning up, kissing Kaito, thrusting his tongue into the boy's blood stained mouth as his hands slid around to un-button Kaito's shirt.

Kaito pulled away after a moment, leaning back on Saguru's thighs, staring down at the blond. "Saguru?" he asked, confused, groaning as Saguru sat up, the blond latching onto Kaito's neck, returning the favor of marking the brunette as he pushed Kaito's shirt down his arms.

Tossing the shirt aside, Saguru pulled back to study the mark before looking up at Kaito. "I propose we come to an...agreement, that will satisfy both of us," he said, sliding a finger down Kaito's chest, smiling as the brunette shivered under the light touch. "My blood...for your body."

"Saguru.."

Saguru leaned in, silencing Kaito with a kiss, his hand working at the button of the magician's jeans. "I need you," he whispered, opening the jeans and pulling down the zipper. "I can't stand it anymore, you left and I felt so cold...so alone. I...everyone around me, clutching at their short lives, eagerly worrying about school and dating and everything that is now so stupid and meaningless." Saguru pulled away more, putting space between the two as his head fell forward, almost resting on Kaito's chest. "I cut myself last night, in the lab...I..." He swallowed and raised his head, tears staining his cheeks. "I should have needed stitches...I should have _bled_ , but it closed...as if nothing had ever happened."

Kaito reached up, gently touching Saguru's cheeks, brushing away the tears with his thumbs before kissing Saguru softly. "I need you," Kaito whispered, and rocked against the blond, distracting Saguru from his thoughts. "Please..."

Saguru smiled and leaned in, kissing Kaito as he rolled them over so that his body covered the magician's smaller form, hand once more exploring the body beneath his.

Kaito yelped before giggling violently as Saguru found a ticklish spot, whimpering from the light, teasing touches. "Sagu-ru!"


	20. Poison Apple

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Never take the antidote, before the poison.

**Poison Apple**

_"Never take the antidote, before the poison." -Latin Proverb_

The Poisoned Apple, the means of death, or at least, near death, to one beautiful princess. It's a simple thing really, on the surface. A shining fruit, plucked fresh and ripe. It glistens in the sun as white teeth bite into it's crisp, firm flesh, red lips caressing the same red skin, sliding slickly, capturing the piece of white flesh in one's mouth, to be chewed...destroyed, irretrievably lost.

But that same apple, that same innocent thing, can become more complex, more deadly as one swallows, not quite crushing it completely. It lodges in the throat, un-moved by force or command. And as the eater falls to their knees, desperately clutching at their throat, scratching long marks down their necks, desperate to get air, that tender fruit becomes a murderer.

Long ago, a princess had but to wait, to be freed from her pain and slumber by True Love's Kiss.

But that was a time long past, and this, is no longer a fairy tale.

The mirror before Saguru was distorted, cracked and warped. The mirror to his left was wiggling, the image ever changing, unable to stay steady. The mirror to his right was true, but reversed. The mirror behind him was blank, waiting for an answer. Through it all, as he turned slowly, examining each one, a whispery voice was floating around the room, _Mirrors to travel, mirrors to spy, mirrors to remember, mirrors to forget, mirrors to rule the world._

On the table before him stood a bottle, the liquid red and rusty inside, a fading black ribbon tied so neatly around his neck.

Saguru reached for the bottle and popped the cork, holding the lip up to his nose and allowing the scent of cherries and blood to wash over him before he drank the liquid in a gulp, seeing more then feeling a wind rush through the room.

The mirrors spun around him, before settling, now with the blank one before him. He set the bottle back on the table, once more whole and pristine. Suddenly darkness swept through him and he felt himself falling backwards, through space, through time, though everything and nothing, darkness claiming him every time he tried to grasp at something to halt his fall.

He landed on a soft bed of some sort, his head resting against a cushion before falling to the side, eyes staring out at an image distorted by glass. He hands came to rest on his upper abdomen, and refused to move even as he brain ordered them to.

He could see, blearily, a forest of trees around him, birds fluttering around, animals occasionally scampering by, off to live their lives. He tried to open his mouth, tried to cry out, but no sound came, no movement of his lips, and suddenly, he could feel something lodged in his throat, hard and un-movable. He felt like gasping for air, even though he wasn't breathing, hands refusing to move to his throat.

_Twice, she came, once with a corset to crush my rubs, and once with a poisoned comb to drug me. But the last time she came, she brought the most beautiful basket of apples that I had ever saw. And this time, she stayed, to watch me die. And to be sure, she held me in her arms until I died, choking on a piece of apple._

His chest started to tighten, something pressing on his lungs, once more causing him to want to gasp, unable to as his body was frozen in stillness. Suddenly, the glass around him shattered, blinding him for a moment as he fell again, through the darkness and this time, clocks.

He landed hard on what should have been a soft cushion, the chair the cushion was attached to forcing him upright, staring at the lounging figure across from him. He stared, almost in shock, almost in expectation, a detached part of his mind wondering why the man had a size tag stuck to his hat.

"Tea?" the man offered, pushing a cup towards Saguru.

Saguru blinked, looking down at the cup before picking it up and taking a sip, gasping as his head started swimming, flowers and cats dancing across his vision. His chair tilted back and once more he was swallowed by darkness, this time with singing numbers and tangoing playing cards.

"Bai, Tantei-san." the man said, smiling his Cheshire cat grin as the darkness swallowed the drugged detective.

This time, when Saguru landed, it was not on cushion, but on stone, where he spied a young woman, sitting on a pillow, a small top like object twirling between her fingers as she slowly spun a thread from a pile of sheered wool next to her. As the thread slid between her fingers and onto the spindle, the thread turned from pale white to a blooded red, paling back again into a rose colour as it slid onto the object, winding it's way up the wooden pole.

There was no sound in the room, silence heavy and thick, falling over the pair like a visible cloud, muffing everything. Even the spindle and thread were silent, something that should have been impossible for a moving set of objects.

The girl looked up, her blue eyes tainted with a sleepy expression. She smiled at Saguru, before lowering her head back over her work, switching hands as her fingers turning the spindle grew tired, resting her wrist for a moment. She laid the spindle on the ground, carefully spinning it like the top it resembled, keeping it moving with an occasional flick as she turned the wool.

Saguru stepped closer, his footsteps silent, un-matching his movements. What had seemed a bundle of fabric, mis-matched and mis-dyed, was in fact two small children, a boy and a girl, looking for all the world, utterly dead.

Saguru knelt, horror struck, resting his finger against the children's neck's, one after another. Relief swept through him as he found them alive, but asleep. He shook them, frowning as neither stirred, shaking harder.

_"The King's daughter shall, in her fifteenth year, prick herself with a spindle and die!"_

"They won't wake up, neither will everyone else...they all just sleep and sleep."

Saguru jumped at both the whispery voice, and the more solid, real one that came from the girl, still spinning next to him. "What?"

The girl didn't answer, just spinning. Saguru watched the spindle turn round and round, as darkness closed over him, sending him into the enchanted sleep that plagued the castle. Saguru never hit the floor though, falling through it and into a more familiar darkness.

Landing this time, once more on a stone floor, he was automatically struck by the heat of the room, loosening his tie and shirt, staring at the beautiful woman across the room from him, her long black hair cascading down her back as she sat at a wooden table, a cauldron of thick, clear liquid next to her on her right, a wooden bowl of apples to her left.

She sat, staring at the mirror across from her, watching her reflection as she ran a comb oh so lightly over her cheek, the thick tines of the metal pushing down on her cheek, almost piercing it as she drew it across her flesh. "The laces broke and the comb has failed, she still lives over the seven hills and seven mountains."

The woman waited, almost for a reply, before sighing, stretching out her arms, resting her head on her arms. "She is growing wiser as she grows older, tricking her is growing harder." The woman raised her hand, gently brushing it over the mirror, tracing the outline of her lips. "My sweet, beautiful, wicked little girl." she murmured, seeing her daughter's features in her own face. She went silent for another moment, just staring at her reflection, before raising back into a proper sitting position, selecting an apple from the bowl, studying it, turning the rich red fruit over in her hands before selecting a brush from the table, dipping it into the thick liquid, swirling it around, coating the bristled before carefully pulling it out, letting it drip a bit before placing the bristles against the apple, carefully 'painting' the flesh with the liquid, making sure to only paint half of it, gently blowing as she did.

She picked up the comb again, in the tiniest of movements, marked the side without poison, smiling as she placed it back in her basket of apples, before standing, grabbing the ragged, worn cloak from the back of her chair, taking the basket with her as she left the room, the torches putting themselves out as the door closed, plunging Saguru into darkness.

And with that, the floor opened beneath him, drowning him.

This time, Saguru landed on a mushroom, slipping off to rest on the grassy floor. He looked around himself, groaning at the sight of the forest, laying back on the grass and staring at the canopy of trees above him, wishing this was all over...whatever it was.

He finally sat up again, noticing this time, there were two paths in front of him. He blinked, staring at the well-trod paths, before standing, looking around him again to see if anything else had changed.

_"Where do you want to go?"_

Saguru jumped at the voice and spun around, finding a fat, purple cat curled up on the mushroom, blinking at him lazily before raising a paw and licking it, eyes never leaving Saguru.

"I...I don't know. I don't even know what's going on."

_"Then...it doesn't matter."_

The voice came from the air around him, and the cat jumped off the mushroom, tail twitching in the air as he padded down a path. The cat paused, turning to look at again as Saguru before rolling onto his back, wiggling in the dirt, causing a cloud of it to raise into the air, before he rolled back to his feet, running down the path.

Saguru stumbled after, wondering what he was doing before he tripped over the spot the cat had been rolling around, staring at the small bottle in the road. It was the bottle from before, filled with the red, rusty liquid and the black ribbon (now dirt stained) wrapped around his neck.

He sat in the road, picking up the bottle, staring down at it.

_"Better read it first, for if one drinks too much from a bottle marked 'Poison', it's almost certain to disagree with one sooner or later."_

Saguru turned the bottle over in his hands, before un-corking it and drinking from it again. He fell back almost immediately, body falling slack, the once again full bottle rolling out of his hand. The ground slowly climbed over him, dragging him down, grass and plants sprouting from the spot where he had been, a red rose bush springing into life.

Blue and red lights were flashing around the room, chasing each other around, reflecting through the window and off the mirrors and metal, illuminating the scene. Various men in suits and uniforms wondered around, almost running into each other in their attempt to gather evidence and find crucial clues.

A young man sat, huddled in an armchair, answering questions that were put to him haltingly, his eyes distant as he watched the crowd, still in shock from what he had found when he came for the evening. Nakamori sighed, rubbing his eyes, a bit of shock effecting him, as he turned to look down at the scene.

Saguru Hakuba, famed international detective, lay dead on the floor of his study, obviously having fallen from the chair. A book lay open next to him, an etched drawing of a girl sleeping staring up at the detectives, blood splattering the pages from when the book had fallen. An apple lay next to Saguru's hand, a large bite taken out of it, the white flesh browning from the air.

Blood pooled around the detective's head, staining his pale skin and blond hair, colouring his lips a deep rose colour. It was still leaking, though slowly, gravity pulling it down where the heart's beating left off.

"Preliminary cause of death is hemorrhagic bleeding from the mouth, resulting in him collapsing." the corner said, sitting back on his calves, trying not to lean into the blood pool and disturb the evidence.

"Any cause?" Nakamori asked, turning his attention away from the body.

The corner shook his head, standing. "We won't know until we get him under the knife, but I have a suspicion it could be an anti-coagulate ingested orally."

Nakamori turned back to the body of the young detective, watching as he was lifted into a bag, the zipper sliding over Saguru's face, hiding him from the world. A forensic team member lifted the partially eaten apple, dropping it into a plastic bag.


	21. Table for Two, Tea for Ghosts

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Saguru goes though the same routine while Kaito matches up socks.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Two stories that share the same theme.

**Table for Two**

The days always go the same, as they have since the pair moved in together.

Saguru woke up with the alarm, absently slapping at it before it woke up his dead to the world lover who probably went to bed only a few hours before. He rolled out of bed stretching his body, working out the kinks that came with laying in one position for most of the eight hours he slept, stumbling for the kitchen, Kaito's robe draped loosely around his body.

He turns on the coffee, ignoring the water draining through old grounds as he filled the kettle for the tea, watching as the flames licked over the metal. He forced himself to stand, putting four slices into the toaster to turn a rich, golden brown as he scrambled eggs and fried fish. He added some bacon to the pan afterwards, frying it up and leaving it for his boyfriend as he took his own breakfast and tea to the table, hungrily eating and contemplating what was to come later in the day.

Saguru knew he didn't really have to work anymore, between his inheritance from his parents and the money Kaito brought to their relationship, but it gave him something to do during the day, and solving mysteries was still his passion.

He worked part time in private practice, and part time with the task force, chasing after the latest clues and tips that came their way as they chased criminal 25686 across most of Asia. It was an easy pair of jobs, frustrating and exilerating, keeping his mind busy and way from matters at home.

He would often take lunch with Nakamori and 'the gang', discussing what he had learned that day at the task force office, bouncing ideas off the older male, wanting the retired man's opinion on this and that and everything else.

After that, when Aoko had driven her father home, dropping Saguru off at his main office, he had a chance to have another tea, and reflect on his life, enjoying the simple afternoon before clients showed, needing his expertise on whatever was bothering them, or Kudo appeared, desperate for a break from his own cases.

He was making a living, but just because he had a job, didn't mean he was living.

He returned home late, usually just an hour or so before Kaito was ready to leave for a performance or heist.

He waits for a moment, listening for Kaito's sounds, before heading into the bathroom to change into something ore comfortable then his work clothes, tossing them carefully into the hamper, still listening. He was always listening, waiting to hear Kaito coming down the hall or calling from the kitchen.

On the whole, the apartment was the same as the night when Kaito left and went out to get himself killed. There were still two white loafers near the TV, where Kaito had kicked them after fleeing Saguru all around the house one heist night, there was still a paper rose and top hat in the hall, still a pile of dirty clothes by the shower and Kaito's pillow tucked halfway off the bed near the night table.

It had been four months, twelve days, six hours and two minutes.

Saguru had always thought the end would be more fiery, have more explosions and changes in weather. The end of the world wasn't supposed to come one lazy summer Sunday, in between "Do we have enough milk" and "Will Nakamori have a heart attack if I turn him lime green?"

Kaito wasn't just supposed to not be there, when Saguru walked through the door.

Kaito was always in charge of dinner, weather it was take out or something the other man had cooked, it was Kaito's job to have it waiting, along with the evening paper when Saguru came home. It hadn't been anything the pair had decided consciously, it just was always the way things went, just as Saguru paid all the bills out of their account and Kaito bought everything and anything they needed for the house.

They both were in charge of housework, even though Kaito sucked at it.

They shared everything, their lives, their homes, their desperation, and their battles. So Saguru always made a point of doing his share, home by eight at least, latest case reports ready to share over dessert, a kiss for his dead lover...

...and a table set for two.

Fin

**Tea for Ghosts**

Maybe it ghosts like this:

Kaito has a wooden box, full of trinkets Saguru never gave him. Old school books, a pair of Sherlock Holmes mugs, an old deerstalker hat and a brown and gold scarf that threatens to unravel every time Kaito so much as looks at it.

The scarf has been dolling out the same threat for ages now, since Kaito was sixteen, and it has yet to follow through. Kaito's not quite so sure what he would do if it would fall apart, repair it for sure, and then maybe he would have to learn a thing or two about taking care of himself.

At least, he might learn to darn a sock.

Kaito's got a lot of socks with holes, hell, he has a lot of socks full stop, and the oddest thing about it, is he doesn't have a pair that matches anywhere.

He has socks in the bathroom, socks on the line out the window, socks that for some reason are in the potted plant, and socks that a cat is trying to shred to bits. Kaito's not sure why he loses so many socks, he just knows he does.

He thinks there might be a ghost that comes and takes them all.

He's invested far too much yen into socks, and yet, somewhere between the washer and his drawers, they get lost. Nothing matches up, dotted, striped, argyle, cotton, polyester, and some silky pair that he knows doesn't belong to him. However, it can't be his fault, his favorite pair doesn't match either.

They have holes in them, in the heels and in the toes, and one has a hole near the top, where a bullet ripped through it, but Kaito doesn't care.

He doesn't care about a lot these days.

He no longer goes to work, spending most of his time these days staring at the paper blue prints and plans that are gathering dust and fading away. No one comes to visit him anymore, his mother having moved away to be closer to the rest of their family, Aoko moving over to collage and later the force.

They claimed he was cutting himself off from them, but Kaito can't see how, as he's always been there, even when they weren't.

But Kaito's socks don't match, and he can't quite remember when they last did.

Saguru had walked away from him at graduation, and promptly into the Task Force's office, giving them all the evidence he collected, including a strand of Kaito's hair that had landed on his arm as he greeted the teen at the ceremony earlier that day, and a piece of gum Kaito had sworn he had slipped into his pocket after taking it from his mouth, but somehow hadn't.

Saguru had never promised, in their long sweaty nights and slow, passionate kisses, that their life would be different, that right or wrong wouldn't come between them, but Kaito had ignored it, too busy being in love and in lust to remember black, white, good or evil.

When Saguru and Kaito next met, staring at each other across the distance of the roof, lights flashing off their clothing and the cries of the crowd echoing around them, Kaito had asked Saguru to come home, to the new apartment Kaito had rented out, wanting the to start over.

It wasn't though, until Saguru had found him backstage, leaning against the dressing table as he panted, wiping sweat and make-up from his face, body still humming from a show well done, the stunned and wondering crowd's whispers fading away as the audience haded home, that he said yes.

Because Saguru couldn't let Kaito go, it would be like cutting off his own arm. He missed the thief magician too much, to care what side they were on.

Saguru died, standing next to Kaito, no longer rivals, no longer on opposite sides, but standing as one, against the darkness trying to overcome them. They fought against each other, they fought to fight...and they fought for each other.

And every night, when Kaito tries to die in Saguru's place, he thinks of this, and wonders if there could be another end.

Three months after Kaito moved into the apartment, he found a tabby kitten sitting on his morning paper that reminded him of Saguru, for no real reason except that it was there. He called the cat Watson and every night, when he sees Saguru, he tells him about the kitten he's raising.

That they should have been raising together.

And, on a day like all others, he opened his front door, to find a kitten pawing at it, dirt and grime matting it's fur. It looks just like the one currently chasing a fake dove around the living room, and the first thing that strikes Kaito is that they're like matching, purring socks.

They're a pair, and and since it would be nice for Kaito to finally have something that matches, he takes the kitten in and gives it a bowl of milk. He names the kitten Arsine and thinks the more the merrier, not minding that this apartment had never actually been Saguru's home.

It doesn't matter to Kaito nor to the ghost that lived with him.

Home to Kaito, is a three room apartment, with too many socks and two mewling kittens. He wonders, if home is where the heart is, has he always truly been alone? Cold fills the house, the two kittens curling close for warmth, for comfort, whining slightly when Kaito shifts, trying to find a spot on the bed that isn't freezing and empty.

It's times like these, he pulls out the box of trinkets, makes tea for ghosts, and tries to match his socks.


	22. Beautiful Broken Toys

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Kaito and Conan find out just how deadly the BO can be, with the twist of a friend.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Extreme torture, gore, blood, mentions of rape.

**Beautiful Broken Toys**

" _You can kill a lifetime without feeling anything but skin." - Chuck Palahniuk_

"What are we doing?" Conan asked, looking up at Kaito who was leaning over him to peer around the corner of the building they were hiding behind.

"He keeps disappearing the same time, every month and I want to know _why_." Kaito said, not taking his eyes off the blond across the street from him, who was sitting at a table, sipping a cup of tea as he read the newspaper.

"Maybe he has a date," Conan suggested dryly before turning his focus back on Saguru.

"Every month?"

"Well, he _is_ rather fixated on time, maybe it's a kink of his."

Kaito snorted before quickly shutting up as a long black limo pulled up to the small outdoor cafe. A woman stepped out, her face covered by a black veil, the black suit hugging her curves. She tucked a loose strand of blond hair behind her ear before turning to her companion who was also stepping out, taking a cigarette out before offering the woman one.

Conan made a noise in his throat and Kaito grabbed the boy's arm as he tried to move. "Stay," Kaito ordered, staring as the pair approached Saguru who stood, greeting them both. "We have to get closer," Kaito muttered.

He tugged Conan along as he moved to another building, before grabbing two menus from the stand at the opposite end from the group, moving through the tables until they were close enough to hear the conversation. Both detective and thief hid behind their menu's, sitting close enough together that they could see each other's face.

"It's good to finally see you, cousin." Saguru said, gently kissing the woman's cheek before pulling out her chair.

The blond smiled, taking her seat. "I have missed you, you must thank your mother for telling me you were in town."

Saguru smiled before turning to the man, his smile slowly slipping away at the cold look he was receiving. The man looked Saguru over, his blue eyes cold as he studied the teenager before him.

"You've grown," he said bluntly.

"It's been seven years, Gaius. One tends to grow when one moves though puberty."

The man snorted, blowing a cloud of smoke in Saguru's face before taking his seat. Saguru blinked at him before sitting as well, sipping his cooling tea. The woman next to them snorted, resting her chin on the back of her hand as she looked between the two men.

"Brothers," She scoffed fondly, ignoring the look she got from the older one.

Kaito's hand clamped over Conan's mouth before he could say anything, waiting until the boy stopped panicking and calmed down. "Mind explaining?" he asked in a stage whisper, ignoring the bantering group near them, but keeping an ear open.

"That's Gin and Vermouth, from the Black Organization," Conan hissed, staring at the table between their menu's.

Kid tried to sort though his 'mental file' of information that Conan and Heiji had shared at the meeting of the minds the foursome had had when discussing their mutual situations, before finally recalling why that bit was important. His gaze turned back towards the table, taking in the interactions and words of the group.

Saguru had been at that meeting between Kaito and the other detectives, Saguru had assisted them in their fight against the Black Organization.

...Saguru was currently having tea with two of the top members whom they were desperate to catch, laughing as if it was Sunday brunch.

Kaito cursed softly, scooting Conan closer. "Traitor?"

Conan shook his head. "Can't tell, could be, could be a foolish bid at getting information."

A waiter came by, setting water glasses down on the table, bowing to them before walking off. Kaito reached out absently, sipping the water as he listened to the threesome. "Could be code..." Kaito suggested, listening to the three discussing gardening and cooking.

"Has to be, I doubt Gin has an interest in botany." Conan muttered, sipping his own water.

It only took moments, for the pair to realize something was wrong. They looked at each other almost simultaneously before un-ceremoniously slipping onto the table, unconscious.

Kaito groaned as awareness started to come back into his mind, hissing in at the pain in his head as light invaded his eyes. He blinked, struggling to see around the glowing orbs that were the lights in the ceiling before rolling his head to the side, his neck muscles not wanting to work, still under the effects of the drug that knocked him out.

Next to him, chained to the wall, was Conan, his head still slumped, the only sign of life in him was the slight rise and fall of the boy's chest. His glasses were missing, as were his watch and shoes. Kaito shifted slightly, frowning as he noticed all of his tricks and traps were also gone, even the deck of cards he had stuffed into his boxer pocket which were nothing more then something for him to play with while attending cram school later in the evening.

He shifted again, turning his attention this time to his hands, trying to look up at them before cursing as his head refused to move.

"It'll be a bit before you get control over that again," a soft, British voice said from the faint darkness.

Kaito blinked, mentally cursing at the fog in his head before turning his focus back to Saguru as the blond stepped out of the shadows, un-buttoning his suit jacket. He took in the black suit, the changed stride, stance...even the way Saguru tilted his head and examined things. The detective had changed. It wasn't one thing, or one motion, but the whole set of them that had previously pointed to 'this is Hakuba Saguru' in Kaito's brain were now all wrong.

"Do you have a name or are you just a low level thug?"

Saguru was silent, slipping off his jacket and laying it over the back of a chair, un-buttoning and rolling up his shirt sleeves before finally deciding to grace Kaito with his attention. "Lager, and don't bother laughing." Saguru said before turning as a door disguised as a wall opened, admitting Gin and Vermouth.

"Ah, our little thief is awake," Vermouth purred, seating herself on the table, crossing one leg over the other. "Good morning." She wiggled her fingers at him before pulling a cigarette from a silver case, allowing Saguru to light it for her.

Gin crossed over to stand before Conan's small body, tilting the knocked out boy's head up, examining him. "Amazing, to think that this had ever been a teenager. Remarkable, truly. I wish we could study him further, his blood could be a key."

"We have enough samples of his blood for study, and if we need more, I have access to another."

"Sherry?" Gin asked, dropping Conan's head as he suddenly lost interest in the boy.

Saguru nodded, leaning against the table next to Vermouth. "She is with Agasa at the moment, and I'd rather she stay there, within reach."

"And I'd rather she stay here, chained to a table." Gin countered, lighting his own cigarette, offering it to Saguru before lighting another.

"And luckily for my sanity, neither of you get a choice." Vermouth said. " _He_ has stated that she is to remain where she is, _until_ such time as we can safely retrieve her."

"So all that's left, is the loose ends." Saguru said, looking over at the chained boys, a bit of a smile curling over his lips.

"You have been given free reign to do as you wish to them, they are no longer needed." Vermouth said, taping her cigarette, allowing the ashes to drop into her lap. "We have enough, and anything else we need, we can get."

Saguru nodded, taking another drag off his cigarette before pushing off the table, crossing over to Kaito who had been watching silently. As the detective approached, he raised his head, staring into the golden brown eyes that were so cold...so dead. He swallowed, before forcing himself still, refusing to tremble.

"I've been longing for this," Saguru said softly, running a finger down Kaito's cheek, before shifting his fingers, the cigarette falling between his index and thumb like a pencil. He drew the cigarette slowly down Kaito's cheek, just barely touching his flesh, allowing the thief to feel the heat, the sense of pain that could come if he just lowered it a bit more.

"Years, I've been waiting, lusting for the moment I could caress this flesh, watch it split, watch the rich red blood that always flows so close to the surface coat you. Hear your screams, hear your whimpers." Saguru licked his lips and Kaito swallowed again, terror filling him in-spite of his wishes.

Saguru lifted the cigarette to his lips, taking a drag off of it and tapping the ashes off before lowering it back to Kaito's face, pressing down this time, hissing between his teeth as Kaito bit off a scream, the smell of burnt flesh filling Saguru's nostrils.

He pulled the cigarette away and flicked it to the floor, stamping it out before crossing back over to the table, leaning against it once more, watching as Kaito trembled in pain before he recovered his poker face, swallowing down the emotions in order to be able to raise a blank face to the three.

"This will be fun," Saguru said as he watched the transformation, eager to break the mask Kaito wore.

"Well then, we'll leave you to it. Let us known when you're ready for our..assistance." Vermouth said before grabbing Gin's jacket, jerking him out of the room and through the hidden door.

Saguru waited until the door slid shut behind the pair before picking a remote up from the table, pressing a button. On the far left wall, a portion of stone slid back, revealing a fireplace that sprung to life with the flick of another button.

Saguru started humming to himself, examining the items of the table, adjusting a few that had been knocked out of place by the threesome. He took a long metal tool, carrying it over to the fire and setting it in a rack so that the end was being heated. He returned to the table, selecting to items, slipping one into his pocket before crossing over to the pair, smiling warmly. "Open please," he said merrily to Kaito whom, of course, resisted, glaring at the detective.

Saguru gave a sigh, even through he had expected Kaito to resist, instead reaching into his back pocket and pulling out small metal pike and a hammer. He leaned in to Kaito, forcing the small pike between Kaito's lips and into a gap where two molars didn't meet up, carefully hammering at the pike until he forced a tooth loose and managed to get Kaito's mouth open about an inch, nearly shoving the whole pike into the boy's mouth.

He left the pike between Kaito's teeth, holding it in place with one hand as he reached into his back pocket again, pulling out what he had originally carried over. The metal mess of wires, bits and springs were held tightly together, about an inch tall, when Saguru maneuvered it into Kaito's mouth, releasing it once he had the two white plastic stoppers hooked behind Kaito's front teeth. The contraption spread apart, holding Kaito's mouth open that inch. Kaito opened his mouth wider to speak, only to be impaired by the gag spreading even taller as Kaito's mouth opened more, but refusing to allow it to close.

Saguru smiled at the sight, before moving to Conan, repeating the technique, having an easier go of it considering the boy was still unconscious.

Once the gags were in place, Saguru stripped the pair, using a knife to cut along the seams enabling him to remove the closing without moving their limbs. He returned to the fireplace, sliding on a long glove before taking the rod he had set to heat up, studying it for a moment, smiling. He crossed back over to the pair, attempting to decide who to enjoy first, before using his thumb to adjust the size of the four hooked prongs at the end of the rod, pressing the hot metal against the flesh of Conan's groin, tightening the prongs again so that they firmly grasped the boy's genitals, the smell of burning flesh scenting the air as Saguru jerked back, flesh and muscle ripping from the boy's body, torn apart by the sharp prongs.

Conan awoke with a scream, his eyes wide in shocked horror, pain coursing through his nerve endings. As Conan panted, whimpering, muted screams slipping from his lips, Saguru returned to the table, this time his hand hovering over a row of glass rods, smiling as he selected one with faintly rainbow coloured swirls traveling up the sides.

Saguru slid the glass dildo into his mouth, sucking on it slightly as he grabbed a tube of lube, hitting another button on the remote to slide Kaito away from the wall, the teenager now only held up by a long beam and the chains around his arms. another button and two more beams came out of the floor, metal cuffs wrapping around the teens thrashing ankles, nearly missing one as they secured the thief's legs well apart.

Saguru opened the tube of lubrication as he stepped behind Kaito, smiling as the boy's body tensed, muscles playing beautifully under his skin. Saguru slid the dildo from his mouth, testing it's temperature before using the thick gel to lubricate the glass, his free hand spreading the other teen's cheeks as he pressed the glass head against Kaito. "Breath deep," he called merrily, before pushing, licking his lips as Kaito gasped, body jerking at the intrusion, pain shooting violently up his spine.

Saguru wiggled the base a touch, making sure it was secure, the round, flat base pressing snug against Kaito's flesh, before stepping back and raising his ever present remote, flicking a switch. A low vibration started, as did a pleasant light show that no one could see, but the warming of the light rods alternated between a pleasant heat to sharp pain when the light stayed one colour for too long.

As Kaito dealt with the painful (yet slightly pleasurable) sensations, Saguru moved around his body, kneeling and eyeballing the flaccid penis before him, before pulling a sterling silver ring from his pocket, lubing it up with his mouth and tounge before working it onto Kaito's penis, making sure it was nicely overly snug. He smiled in satisfaction before leaning in, taking Kaito's member into his mouth, sucking gently on it as he reached between the teen's legs and gently gripped Kaito's scrotum, pulling a touch as his other hand opened another ring, this one designed to fit around the loose skin the pulling created. Saguru held it closed with his fingers as he released the flesh, fishing an allen wrench from his pocket and screwing shut the ring, effectively trapping the boy's testicles.

Pulling away from Kaito with a smirk at the moan of loss, Saguru stood and returned to the table, selecting a long chain and a medium weight steal ball, before returning to the teen, slipping the chain through the two wing openings on the sides of the scrotum ring, locking them together before releasing the weight, grinning as Kaito gave a sharp gasp as the weighted ball swung back and forth.

Satisfied that Kaito was taken care of for the moment, Saguru once more returned to the table, this time returning with a long iron rod and a pear shaped object. He used the same control of the remote to extend Conan's bonds, moving behind the boy to insert the pear into his rectum up to the flat base, humming as he inserted the rod into the ring at the base, turning the screw inside the pear to expand it.

Conan started to scream as the pear expanded, his breath coming in gasps as he tried to breath though the pain and the urge to release the pent up emotions with his voice. Saguru paused when the pear was half expanded, letting Conan catch his breath, circling around the boy to gently lick the tears off his smooth cheeks, smiling at the pained gasping whimpers. Saguru pulled a leather case from his back pocket, opening it to reveal a selection of needles ranging from the size of a small sewing needle, to one as long as his hand and as thick as a cocktail straw.

He shifted so he was sitting Indian style, staring at the boy's ruined groin and stomach, pinching a small bit of flesh between his hands, before slipping a smaller needle through it, enjoying the gasping breath from above him. Moving up to Conan's lower chest, he choose a larger needle, slipping it through Conan's flesh, licking at the blood that had slipped from the wound, before selecting yet another larger needle, this time slipping it through Conan's nipple, sucking on the bit of pierced flesh to capture the droplets of blood. He stood, examining his mini metal latter, gently flicking each one before returning, fully expanding the pear.

He moved back before Conan, gently tilting the boy's head up, looking into the fevered, vacant eyes. As Conan's breathing grew ragged, cold seeping into his body, Saguru once more went behind the boy, this time sliding the rod free of the loop, turning it so that the sharpened tip was near his hand. He knelt, carefully feeding the rod through a gap in the pear and into the boy's body, before inserting the other end into a hole in the ground.

He lifted Conan up, taking the boy's weight as he stood the rod upright, pressing yet another button on his remote to raise the boy's bonds, keeping Conan secure in the air, just barely hanging on the rod. Stepping back, Saguru moved over to Kaito, gently slapping the teen who was floating on pleasurable waves of vibration from the dildo inside him.

Kaito's blue eyes flickered slowly before opening, staring at Saguru, revealing the pleasure he was feeling before his poker mask slammed back down, locking Saguru out. Saguru tisked, and licked at Kaito's lips before turning the teen's head, forcing him to face Conan as Saguru released the smaller boy's bonds, gravity sending the boy to the floor, the sharp rod that he had been gently resting on now protruding from his upper chest.

Conan gave a gurgling gasp, before his body completely slumped, life fleeing from him. Kaito gave a whimper in-spite of his wishes, staring helplessly at the small, bloody form, a tear winding it's way down his cheek.

Saguru raised Kaito's head again, frowning at the tear flowing out of blank eyes, licking Kaito's face clean of the liquid and the blood that had sprayed from Conan's body. He gently bit and kissed his way down to Kaito's lips, sucking on the lower lip for a moment before pulling away, licking his own lips as he returned to his table, picking up a bundle of incense and a lighter.

Returning to Kaito, he slipped the incense in his shirt pocket, before selecting one and lighting the end, allowing it to burn red before shaking it out and drawing the rose scented stick down Kaito's body, giving the boy gentle burns as the stick moved down, creating rose red patterns on Kaito's flesh, his tounge chasing after the incense, caressing the burnt flesh, before pulling away and allowing the incense stick to fall to the cement floor, burning merrily while Saguru slid a small knife from his waistband, tracing the tip back up the burnt lines, blood welling after the knife even though Saguru was barely applying pressure.

Saguru's tongue once more traced after the instrument, lapping at the blood hungrily, sucking on the flesh, the heat of his mouth causing spikes of pain. His lips wrapped around one of Kaito's nipples, sucking eagerly as the knife drew a daisy around the other one, the last petal finished when Saguru switched to eagerly suck on the blood coated and neglected nipple.

Once Saguru was satisfied with his oral molestation and Kaito was fighting a losing battle against his gasping moans, Saguru stood back examining his handiwork, plunging the knife hilt deep into Kaito's stomach to finish off the picture. He left the knife in Kaito's body, instead turning his attention to the dildo still inside Kaito, adjusting the vibrations before taking a seat at the table, lighting another cigarette and watching as the teen struggled on his bonds, body torn between pain and pleasure, both fighting for control of his nerves.

Saguru debated on ordering lunch for his break, settling instead for a beer from the mini-fridge behind him, opening it and pouring it into a glass, sipping as he watched Kaito as if the teenager was his favorite telly program.

It was just as Saguru was draining the last of his beer that Kaito broke, giving a loud, strangled cry, a mixture of the torment on his body, slumping heavily against his bonds, tears spilling freely from his eyes. Saguru stood, selecting a large hammer and pike from the table before returning to Kaito's side.

He set the tip of the pike against the glass dildo's base, before swinging hard with the hammer, shattering the object, causing Kaito to scream as glass shards dug into his body, blood spilling freely down his thighs.

Saguru slipped a long, thick shard from Kaito's body, licking it free of blood, humming as he moved in front of the teen, staring at him for a moment, his face blank, almost as if he was contemplating taking out the trash, rather then someone's life, before thrusting the shard into Kaito's chest, stilling his heart.


	23. Amoureux immortels

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Saguru captures not only Kaito, but a lover from the past.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Alternate Universe

**Amoureux immortels**

" _We don't have an eternity to realize our dreams, only the time we are here." -Susan Taylor quotes_

Kaito held the glittering diamond in his hand up to the moon above, the chaos and drama of a heist fading away from him as a red glow started in the center of the diamond, growing and bathing him in the light, painting his face a faint rose colour.

The door behind him burst open and Saguru skid to a stop, gun out and ready, eyes casting about for a moment before he caught sight of the thief, cursing.

"Found it, tantei-san," Kid called merrily, turning to glance over his shoulder. "Or should I call you détective, after all these years?"

"Damn you, Lupin," Saguru cursed, holstering his gun.

The thief tisked, flicking a hand in order to cause the diamond to vanish down his sleeve, sliding gloved hands into his pockets. "Now, now, détective, there's really no need for that. I trust this satisfies the terms of the bet?"

The detective nodded, whistling sharply and calling his hawk to him, holding out a gloved hand for the bird to rest on. He un-tied the bag around the bird's leg, tossing the bag of coins at the thief's feet, before holding his hand out.

The diamond once more appeared in a gloved hand and the thief offered the diamond to the detective, a small smile crossing his face as he was pulled against the blond's body, their lips meeting.

"I saw...oh," Jii said, freezing on the ladder before smiling, remembering the same scene, one hundred years ago.

_Paris, France, 1874_

"You have reached the end of the line, Lupin."

The gentlemen thief clutched his cane, staring down at the edge of the rooftop the pair had been running across, one in desperate escape, the other for the justice of finally...finally catching his prey. He stared at the police officers and reporters gathered around, eager to see the end of a chase that had seemed to consume years, but in reality had only been a few months. "Would that I had wings to fly," Arsène murmured, staring at the ground before turning, taking in his adversary, a small smile creasing his lips. "So what now, Monsieur Holmes? Will you chase me over the edge?"

"You won't jump, Lupin. You're too invested in your own survival. The diamond, if you please."

"I'm afraid I can't remember where I put it, if you would just give me a second..."

"It's in your breast pocket, now..." Holmes held out his hand, the other clutching a pair of handcuffs in the pocket of his overcoat.

Arsène sighed, removing the diamond from his pocket, twirling it between his fingers before approaching the detective, his mind running to find an escape, a distraction. He looked up at Holmes as their fingers met, gloved against flesh and Arsène leaned in, pressing his lips against Holmes, closing his eyes while the other's widened.

"Holmes, I just saw...oh dear." Watson blinked, staring at the pair as he leaned against the ladder, rather stumped at the scene.

Holmes pulled away after a moment, looking at the man across from him. "What about Joséphine?"

"She is not here, it's no matter of concern." Arsène said with a grin, before moving his hand, sending the diamond still clutched loosely in Holmes grip, up into he air. He had intended to simply send the gem away, where he could retrieve it later, unfortunately, he mis-calculated how hard he hit it and at what angle, and as the gem shimmered above the pair, catching the light, a few stray droplets of liquid hit the pairs lip's, caught as they were in the red glow above them.

_Meiringen, Switzerland, 1891_

"You're soaking!" Arsène exclaimed, rising from his chair as the newspaper he had been reading fell aside the moment he saw his lover enter the small house they had been renting.

"As one would be if one takes and un-expected bath over the edge of a waterfall..." Sherlock mumbled through shivering teeth before striding across the room, grasping Arsène's upper arms in a painful grip.

"Sherlock, what are you..."

"Shut up," the detective barked out, eyes casting about the room, far too wide for Arsène's tastes. "Where is it?"

"Where is...what?" Arsène asked, wincing as Sherlock's grip tightened before releasing the thief, leaving him to rub his arms as he watched his love circle the room before removing a knife from the block of cheese Arsène had been snacking on as he waited for Sherlock's confrontation to end. "What are you...Sherlock! If this is one of your stupid English idiosyncrasies, I am not amused!" Arsène chastised as he grabbed a towel, wrapping it around the wound on Sherlock's arm from the detective slicing into it.

"You're the Frenchman, idiosyncrasies are you're area of expertise." Sherlock said, allowing Arsène to bustle him into a chair, the thief tossing the stained rag into the trash before grabbing another.

"Killing yourself may have topped any..." Arsène trailed off, staring at the wound that just moments ago had been bleeding his partner's life away. Now he could barely see it, if not for the few blood stains still there. "How?"

"I fell _over_ the falls, Arsène. I hit my head on the way down, I _know_ I did, and now...nothing. I knew that glow wasn't natural, there was something wrong. I've been looking, searching, that gem, it's not.."

Sherlock was going a mile a minute and Arsène rubbed his temple, feeling a migraine coming on. "You're blaming the fact you're a phénomène on a _gem_?" he asked, watching as Sherlock paced the room, falling into the chair the detective had vacated and lighting a cigarette, watching Sherlock, before shaking his head and turning his attention to the fallen newspaper, missing the detective spin around, knife in hand.

He gasped, newspaper and cigarette falling as he stared at Sherlock's face, so close to his own, the pain emanating from his chest incredible. Arsène blinked, looking down at the knife protruding from his chest before giving an un-manly whimper, clutching at the knife, pulling it free from his chest, blood spilling from his lips as his heart continued to beat.

" _How_?" he gasped through the blood, ripping open his shirt to watch as the wound slowly closed.

"Pandora."

_Berlin, Germany, 1950_

"Have you found it?" a man asked, clothed in darkness, the heavy wool of the rags and blankets around him scratching at his flesh.

"You doubt me?" the young man next to the bum asked with a scoff, lighting a cigarette, before offering one to his companion as he took a seat on the bench next to the man, wrinkling his nose at the smell from the bum, scooting over to clear the air. "I do hope you plan on bathing before coming home."

Sherlock had to smile at that, taking a drag of the cigarette offered to him, scooting closer to his companion, laughing fully as Arsène made a noise like a scalded cat, the thief leaping to his feet. "When are you going to acquire it?"

"Next week, it's currently under the display of a new security measure I have not yet managed to crack."

"Shall I call the papers and inform them that the great thief has met a system he can't outmaneuver within a minute?"

Arsène lightly smacked his lover, before taking a seat again, curling next to him, ignoring the looks they received. "What are we going to do, now that we've found her?"

"I don't know, but I'm sure we can find another way to pass the time."

_London, England, 1996_

"I hear you have found your new identité?" Arsène said, looking down his nose at the young blond next to him.

"I have, he is a young detective...pretty good from what I hear." Sherlock said, running a hand through his freshly dyed hair, before reaching out, curling a strand of Arsène's brunette locks around his finger. "And what of you, have you found yours?"

'Mm, that would make it far too easy for you, now wouldn't it...detective?" Arsène said, taking the hand playing with his hair and pressing a kiss to the palm of Sherlock's hand before sighing, staring at the long list of flights before him. "Are you sure about this?"

"I miss the chase, Arsène. I miss the thrill of being one step behind you. I miss catching you." Sherlock pulled the brunette into his lap, wrapping his arms around his slender body, nuzzling his thief's neck. "It won't be for long, you know that. I won't _let_ it be for long. I can't be parted from you for that long, and besides, you're not _that_ good."

Arsène scoffed, resting his head on Sherlock's shoulder, trying to imagine living apart from his lover after so long side-by-side. "I got you a gift," Arsène said softly and snapped his fingers, smiling as an elderly gentlemen wheeled a covered cage over to them. "She's young, but she's well trained...I..." Arsène trailed off, removing the cover of the cage, revealing a beautiful sparrow hawk who was glancing around, as if she could see though her hood.

"She's beautiful, thank you." Sherlock said, gently reaching through the bars of the cage to pet the bird. He turned, to reward his love with a kiss, only to find a rose laying on the bench next to him, Arsène and Watson vanished into the crowd.

_Tokyo, Japan, 2001_

The pair pulled apart, smiling at each other before leaning in for another kiss, turning only when a soft cough came from behind them. Jii...or as he was known years ago, Dr. John Watson leaned against the edge of the building, smiling at the pair. "I doubt that Inspector Nakamori would enjoy finding you two in such a position."

"My apologize," Arsène said, sliding the top hat from his head, dropping the bag of coins into it before slipping it back onto his head. "I should go..."

"I will meet you at my house?" Sherlock asked, brushing his fingers over Arsène's cheek, smiling as his lover turned into his touch.

The thief nodded, before turning back to the edge of the building, smiling at the sight below. "Would that I had wings," he whispered, flashing Sherlock a grin before jumping off the edge of the building, his white hang glider opening above him as he soared above the police, reporters and fans below.

Sherlock watched him go, shaking his head before shoving his hands into the pocket of his overcoat, joining Watson as the pair headed down to deal with the police, before meeting with Arsène again. Sherlock's hand curled around the diamond in his pocket, a grin fighting it's way to his face as he wondered what his lover would have waiting for him, after so long apart.


	24. Deals with Gods

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> After the death of Conan and Kaito, the BO has two loose ends to tie up. (Sequel to "Beautiful Broken Toys")

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Torture, blood, gore, incest.

**Deals with Gods**

_It doesn't hurt me.  
You wanna feel how it feels?  
You wanna know, know that it doesn't hurt me?  
You wanna hear about the deal I'm making? _

Saguru stared at the man hanging before him, held up by the long nails driven into his arms, securing him to the planks of wood the blond had set up hours earlier before luring his prey to this remote rooftop.

Humming happily, he picked a coil of rope up off the ground and started knotting it, switching to whistling as he finished the noose and gently slipped it around his victim's neck, tossing one end over the crossbar of the wooden support, before grabbing a hammer and prying the nails from his victim, moving around the structure to grab the loose rope just as the victim's body weight pulled him fully from the supporting beams.

The man's eyes slowly opened, shooting wide as he clutched at his neck, gagging and coughing. Saguru pulled tighter on the rope, wrapping it around a large metal pipe, moving back around the structure, smiling at his dangling victim as he lit a cigarette. "It's a long three minutes, waiting for someone to suffocate," he said conversationally, taking a drag before offering the cigarette to his victim. "No?" he shrugged and took another drag, settling himself into the canvas chair he had brought up to the roof for the occasion, pulling his pocket watch from his jacket pocket and checking the time.

"I hear it will be a beautiful sunset," he said to the dangling man. He snapped the watch closed and reached into the cooler next to his chair, pulling out a sandwich, giving it a sniff as he un-wrapped it, deeming it edible and taking a large bite, fishing out a soda to wash it down with.

"You know, if you kick enough, you might just throw yourself down," he stated as he swallowed, wincing as the dry sandwich got stuck in his throat. He took a sip of soda before nodding to the structure holding the man up. "It's not very sturdy."

Not that the man would actually be able to knock himself to the ground, Saguru made sure it would support his thrashing weight...if wobble enough to give the man hope. Saguru continued to eat his lunch, enjoying his dining entertainment of a struggling man.

Two minutes and thirty seconds later, however, the sandwich was gone and Saguru was forced to go behind the structure, loosening the tension on the rope, allowing the man a reprieve to breath. Saguru started humming again as he went back to his chair, grabbing a large plastic thermos.

"Why?" The man finally gasped out, clinging to the rope, keeping it from his neck so he could breath.

Saguru glanced up at the man as he opened the spout of the thermos, smiling peacefully. "Because you dug too deep, Hattori-kun. Not to mention all those nasty little notes you sent to Meguire and Nakamori." He turned his head from the smell emanating from the thermos, heaving it towards Hattori, splashing the man with the pungent liquid.

Hattori gagged at the smell, his struggling reaching a new pitch as he recognized the scent. "You killed them!"

"Of course I did, it's my job. One doesn't obtain the title of 'torturer' for knitting tea cozies, though mine are rather nice looking." He splashed the man again, circling around him to add some fluid to Hattori's back. "But what I did, was none of your concern. It wasn't even your department."

"They were our friends! How could you.."

"We have no friends, Heiji. You knew that when you signed on the dotted line." Saguru un-screwed the lid of the thermos as he returned to the front of the other teenager, looking up into Hattori's terrified face before giving the other man a full frontal splash of gasoline.

He tossed the thermos aside, grimacing at the smell still on his hands before reaching into his pocket and pulling out a pack of matches. "I would say I'm sorry..." He shrugged elegantly and lit a match, tossing it in the puddle of gasoline below the dangling man. The flames took a moment to ignite, before exploding, the gasoline on Hattori's clothes bursting into flames, the man's screaming following mere moments later.

Saguru moved his chair to get out of the path of the wind, smiling as he took his seat again, watching the flames set against the setting sun, leaning back as he enjoyed the sight and sounds of his deeds.

_And if I only could,  
Make a deal with God,  
And get him to swap our places _

Gin smiled as the blond chained to the wall raised his head, brushing a thumb through the sweat that coated his brother's cheek, sucking the fluid from his fingers as he studied Saguru's hazel eyes, watching them attempt to focus, before being swamped under the un-relenting pleasure Saguru had been trapped in for over two weeks.

"Do you want me to remove it?" Gin asked conversationally, tapping a cigarette out of the case, carefully placing the slender fag between his lips and lighting it, admiring the reflection against his brother's skin before snapping the lighter shut.

Saguru made an in articulate sound, suddenly flexing against his bonds, before slumping, staring sightlessly ahead, hips spasming as his body attempted to relieve the pressure on it from the too tight ring around the base of his penis and balls.

Gin took pity on the boy and circled behind Saguru, removing the vibrating toy that had been bothering him so. As he did, he leaned up against the bare, muscular back of the former detective, his nose gently brushing over the sweaty skin of Saguru's neck, inhaling the scent deeply. "Time to play, Saguru-chan."

Gin carefully pulled his victim from his restraints, nodding to Vodka who helped to carry the bulky teenager over to the table already prepared for the day's festivities. He dismissed his partner with a negligent wave of his hand, his mind already focused on the events ahead.

Gin sighed, removing his hand and running a hand through his hair before picking up a hair band that was resting next to a large selection of various knifes, braiding his hair and tying up the end before tossing it over his shoulder out of his way as he slipped off his jacket and rolled up his shirt sleeves, smiling as Saguru's eyes started to focus on the movements.

"So glad you could join me, brother." Gin said around his cigarette, running a finger down Saguru's chest before crossing the room to where Saguru's clothing and belongings lay from when they had stripped the blond. Reaching into the pocket of the large over-coat, Gin removed a small leather case, un-zipping it and smiling in satisfaction at the neat row of carefully kept tools. "Perfect, as always."

He returned to Saguru's side, staring down at his canvas before selecting one of the smaller, more delicate knives, gently running the flat edge of the blade down Saguru's chest and abdomen to his navel, before sliding the knife between his fingers like a pencil, carefully carving lines into his brother, silver eyes intent as he studied each line, each twist and curve of his creation, holding his brother down as the blond started to buck, twisting instinctively away from the pain.

Gin pulled away from the carving across Saguru's chest and stomach, smiling at the lotus flower before returning to the bag he retrieved from Saguru's clothing, opening it to reveal his brother's favorite needles.

He selected a few, putting them into his pocket before grabbing a small vial near Saguru's hip, un-corking it and dumping a few crystals out, tasting them with a smile. "Sea salt," he said to Saguru, wiggling the vial in the boy's line of sight before humming as he started sprinkling the mineral over Saguru's chest, rubbing the crystals into the wounds, licking his lips as Saguru's screams sounded again, ripping from the boy's throat.

As Saguru panted, Gin pulled the needles from his pocket, dropping them into the center of the lotus carving before leaning over the blond's body, his lips inches from Saguru's. "Now let's see, what did you use these for with your little friends? Ah yes, you made a ladder." He grinned and lid down Saguru's body, feeling his brother's blood soak into his shirt, staining it. He hovered over the leaves of the flower, selecting a needle and inserting it horizontally through one of the lines of the leaves, smiling as it created a metal thorn. "Let's be a bit creative, shall we?"

Gin continued outlining the leaves in needle thorns, each pained gasp from Saguru running strait through his body to his groin. He finished his task and stood again, examining Saguru. "You're so beautiful," he whispered, brushing a hand over Saguru's thigh.

He selected another knife and smiled, running the flat of the cold blade over Saguru's skin, before suddenly stabbing the knife through Saguru's calf, almost pinning the boy to the metal table. Saguru screamed again and Gin groaned, lighting a fresh cigarette, once more studying Saguru before climbing onto the table, this time laying fully over Saguru's body, leaning down to kiss the teenager, blowing smoke into Saguru's mouth, smiling as the boy inhaled, allowing room for his tounge to follow, tasting Saguru.

He pulled away after a moment, brushing his nose over Saguru's sweaty cheek. He sighed, sliding down Saguru's body, pausing at the still erect penis before smirking and picking up the pouch with the needles again, sliding one out and oh so gently, sliding it through the flesh around the base of Saguru's penis.

Saguru's scream was louder then the previous, cracking violently midway through before returning full force as Gin added another needle. And when the third went in, Saguru's voice gave out from the force, blood slipping from his lips as his vocal cords hemorrhaged. Gin added a fourth needle, before moving around the table to lean over, kissing Saguru again, lapping away the blood eagerly.

_You don't want to hurt me,  
But see how deep the bullet lies.  
Unaware that I'm tearing you asunder.  
There is _ _thunder_ _in our hearts, baby.  
So much hate for the ones we _ _love_ _?_

The young man stared at the doors around him, nervously tugging at the black leather collar around his neck. It had been a week, since his master said he would return, and every moment beyond that time was making the young teenager nervous, scared that his master wasn't returning and leaving him in the hands of these grim faced men and women his master surrounded himself with.

He looked both ways, thankful that no one seemed to be around before quietly walking down the quiet, too white hallway of the scientific lab he and his master lived in. A door swished open before him and the teenager ducked into a small access hall, peeking around the edge of the wall to watch a blond woman and a man who never seemed to talk walk past, not noticing the small, underfed figure in the shadows.

The young slave gave a sigh of relief that he wasn't noticed, unsure what the pair would do now that his master wasn't around, before hurrying down the hall in the opposite direction of the pair, even more eager to find his master.

The air around the young man was cold, growing even colder as he reached some of the active laboratories. The young slave paused in a small alcove, wrapping his arms around his body as he breathed against his arms and legs, trying to get warmth into his body. He tugged ruefully at the small, thin cotton pajamas his master had left him with, wishing that he had some of the warm clothes from his previous life, almost missing even the basics that he could barely remember once owning.

A smile slipped on his lips as he remembered the warm arms of his master, and he stood, using the memory of warmth and safety to push himself on, trying to find the tall, frightening man that would probably know where his master was...unknowing that the man was currently with his master in a room just two hallways away.

Tell me, we both matter, don't we?  
It's you and me...

We won't be unhappy...

Gin smiled, gently petting his brother's hair as the boy slowly came back to consciousness, fire striking him as he nerves awoke, causing Saguru to whimper, squirming on the table as he tried to get away from the pain.

"Shh, it'll be alright, brother mine," Gin whispered, gently kissing down Saguru's forehead, cheek and neck.

Saguru looked up at his brother, opening his mouth to say something, only to find his voice missing, vocal cords still torn apart. Gin smiled and gently kissed Saguru's lips, before standing. He un-chained Saguru from the table and climbed onto the blood soaked surface as he pulled Saguru into his arms, oh so gently cradling the boy's body as he petted him, his touch sending fiery shocks of pain each time he brushed over one of the many cuts decorating Saguru's arms and back.

"Shh, it's almost over, tiny one," Gin whispered in Saguru's ear, using a nickname for his brother that he hadn't since the boy had turned six. "I promise, it'll all be over soon."

Saguru gave a small, breathy sound, knowing what the words meant. He curled into his brother, despite the fact that man was also his torturer, clinging tightly to Gin's bare shoulders, tears stinging the wounds on his face.

Gin held Saguru close with one arm around the boy's waist, reaching for a large knife next to him, ready to deliver the final order of his boss, when a beep sounded from the door, and the video connected to it displayed a fidgety brunette. Saguru's head raised at the beep, his rather addled mind struggling to remember what the sound meant, only to be distracted by Gin's lips over his. "I think, this will be a more...suitable moment." The silver haired man whispered against his brother's lips before gently sliding from the table, laying Saguru down and covering the blond with a blanket.

He crossed over to the wall, releasing the valves of several tanks, opening them in order to poison his brother, but at a slow enough rate that Saguru would have an audience for the final moments, something Gin thought Saguru might appreciate.

Gin slid out the side door, activating the main door as he did, the young teenager entering just as his own door slid shut behind him, blocking him from view.

_'C'mon,_ _baby_ _, c'mon, c'mon, darling,  
Let me steal this moment from you now.  
C'mon, angel, c'mon, c'mon, darling,  
Let's _ _exchange_ _the experience, oh..._

"Master? Master!" The young slave ran over to the blond body on the table, climbing up onto it and shaking his master who was not only covered in blood, but seemed quite out of it. "Master, wake up...master, please!" He continued violently shaking the blond, tears coming into his eyes.

"Saguru, god dammit!" Kaito whispered, slapping the man who had not only killed him, but kept him trapped in this damn lab as his slave. "Come on, you annoying little..." Kaito suddenly trailed off, focused on the hissing sound that was coming to his ears. He frowned, glancing around, trying to figure out where it was coming from, only to nearly scream and leap off the table when something grabbed him.

He looked down at Saguru, who was clutching Kaito's arm as tightly as he could...which wasn't much. "Thank god," Saguru whispered, pulling Kaito down against him.

"Come on, I'm getting you out of here," Kaito whispered, trying to climb away from Saguru who just shook his head and clutched the other teen closer.

"Don't...just...lay here, please."

"Come on, Saguru!" Kaito growled, pulling free of Saguru's grasp and trying to pull the larger man off the table. "I'm not going to let you fucking die here! Not until I get you back for Conan." Kaito pulled Saguru hard, managing to pull the blond off the table...and onto him, the heavier bulk pressing the young magician into the floor. "God dammit!"

Saguru nuzzled Kaito's neck, curling into the other teenager. "Let's go together," Saguru whispered, rolling off Kaito to lay next to him, their hands clasped, legs entwined. "I can go, with you."

Kaito blinked, staring at the mess of bloody blond hair that was resting against his shoulder, before turning his gaze to the ceiling, tears rolling down his face. He closed his eyes and curled against Saguru, his arms wrapped around the other man. "I hate you," he whispered against the blond's cheek, his tears mixing with Saguru's.

"Love you...too," Saguru whispered as the helium took it's effect on his battered body.

Kaito titled Saguru's head up, holding the blond as tightly as he could, watching as the teenager died in his arms, his body shaking with the emotion. He couldn't say he loved Saguru, the man had taken too much from him, but it was still hard, living the past year as Saguru's lover, only to end it with the blond laying there, dead.

Kaito buried his head in Saguru's shoulder, crying softly for the life they could have had, as the gas pulled him away.

_And if I only could,_  
Make a deal with God,  
And get him to swap our places


	25. Passion

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Needs, wants, desires...hunger. (Sequel to "Anesdoria").

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Vampires.

**Passion**

_"Passion, it lies in all of us, sleeping... waiting... and though unwanted... unbidden... it will stir... open its jaws and howl. It speaks to us... guides us... passion rules us all, and we obey. What other choice do we have? Passion is the source of our finest moments. The joy of love... the clarity of hatred... and the ecstasy of grief. It hurts sometimes more than we can bear. If we could live without passion maybe we'd know some kind of peace... but we would be hollow... Empty rooms shuttered and dank. Without passion we'd be truly dead." (Buffy the Vampire Slayer, "Passion")_

He could feel the urge to bite simmering just under the surface, jaws snapping shut even as he kept his mouth closed against the urge, eyes screwed up with each bite and release. His tongue ran over the elongated canines in his mouth, the phantom sensation of blood pooling against his tongue, washing down his throat with each beat of another's heart.

He yawned, and his jaw snapped shut again, fighting, straining for the resilient push of soft flesh. Growling under his breath he buried his face in his arms, fingers clenched against the edge of his desk as he forced down the hunger, the need.

The bell rang, jerking him out of his thoughts and his head shot up as a hand touched his shoulder, the faint pulse against his ear driving him insane. He turned, ready to snap at (or into) the interloper only to find knowing amber eyes gazing back and Kaito stood, pushing away from his desk and following Saguru out of the classroom, moving against the tide of students who were eager for lunch.

He pressed the blond against the door of a supply closet, ignore the grunt of pain from the other teen as his mouth latched eagerly onto Saguru's neck, sucking at the flesh, a low whimper escaping him as he kneaded his hands against Saguru's chest. The door opened behind them and Kaito stumbled in after Saguru, kicking the door shut again as his teeth sank eagerly into the flesh offered, gulping mouthfuls of the rich, red blood below the surface.

Saguru hissed, his hands clenching at Kaito's waist, realizing they had gone too long between meals if Kaito was reacting this quickly. His hands pulled at Kaito's shirt pulling it free of the boy's waistband, eager fingers sliding under to caress the warm flesh beneath. His hands slid back down to Kaito's hips, grabbing and jerking the boy closer, hissing as their bodies pressed together, his own hunter rising, nails digging into soft flesh and thick cotton. "Kaito, please," he groaned, giving Kaito more of his neck.

Appetite sated, Kaito pulled free of Saguru's flesh, licking his lips to capture every red drop, before pulling Saguru down into a hungry kiss, sharing the taste of the blood he had sampled before shoving Saguru away, a wicked glint in his eyes. He licked his lips again, sinking elegantly to his knees, working the blond's belt free of it's confines, eyes never leaving Saguru's face as the detective leaned back against the shelves behind them, a hand brushing lightly over Kaito's face before burring itself in his hair.

Kaito wrapped his mouth around Saguru, sucking slowly at first, simply savoring the moment as he felt Saguru pet his head, long fingers gently massaging his scalp. There's was a simple partnership, Kaito needing blood to sustain Anesidora, and Saguru needing energy to sustain his eternal life, and easy trade off considering neither one of them could really get just what they needed anywhere else...but it was the softness, the quiet moments that sometimes made Kaito question wither or not there was something else...something more under the surface of needs and wants.

He reached a hand up, stroking in unison with his sucking, tongue lapping eagerly at the tip of Saguru as he raised his eyes up again, watching the blond. Saguru's eyes had closed, the blond limp and plaint as he fought not to thrust against Kaito's movements, breathing heavily through his nose as he felt his body come alive. He could eat for days, sleep for eternity, and never feel as awake and vibrant as he did when Kaito was wrapped around him, fueling him.

Kaito smirked slightly, his free hand reaching to stroke Saguru's thigh, increasing his pace a touch. They had been at this for over a month now, and Kaito was a fast study on just what were the right buttons to push to get Saguru going...and just how hard to push them. He pulled away fro a moment, shifting his jaw and taking a steadying breath before taking Saguru back into his mouth, deeper this time, fighting against the urge to gag and cough as he tightened his grip around the shaft, stroking opposite of his mouth's movements, sending conflicting signals to Saguru's brain, and turning the taller boy's legs into mush.

Saguru hissed deeply through his teeth, his hand clenching against Kaito's scalp, curling his hand into a fist in the boy's hair before he dug his nails into Kaito's flesh and hurt him. His hips gave an aborted thrust, promptly slammed back against the shelves by Kaito before they could finish the movement, amused blue eyes glittering up at Saguru before Kaito started humming.

The vibrations knocked Saguru over the edge, a bitten off cry escaping him as he held Kaito's head, braining happily shutting down as his orgasm surged through him. Kaito sat back on his heels, giving a few more laps to Saguru's length before pulling away fully, allowing the blond a chance to recover and put himself to rights before the magician stood, stealing a kiss that was too sharp and too bloody to be innocent. Licking the tips of his canine's, Kaito slipped away from the closet, leaving Saguru behind as he headed to class, a smirk on his lips.

…

They didn't expect for it to all go so horribly wrong.

Some how, in some fashion, Kaito had lost control of everything. Granted, Kaito wasn't God and he didn't control the world, but Saguru had forgotten...lost track of the fact that as hard as Kaito tried, he wasn't the puppet master pulling the strings, and no matter how hard he tried...they tried...the fate did so like playing humans for utter fools. As he sat in the cold, drafty jail cell, staring at the institutional white wall and the cot bolted into the floor, he could pick out each piece that went wrong, each moment where the strings started to fray.

It has been a simple, _normal_ heist. The first one since Anesidora...the first one since this entire...disaster had started. It had all gone...absolutely perfectly (or horribly, depending on whose side of the fence you stood on), and then it all crashed down in a hail of gunfire and blood spraying across his face.

Kaito had been shot not a step away from freedom, his neck spilling open, blood creating a fine mist across the air as he twisted, hitting the roof railing with his thighs and tumbling over it. Saguru had gone after, not by choice or will, but by the sheer fact he had been reaching for Kaito at the time and had gotten tangled in the boy's legs and cape.

They hit the balcony two floor below, sending a plume of dirt from the flower bed into the air, bodies heaving in pain...they were immortal, not un-breakable, and by the glow of the searchlights and moon, Saguru realized something was wrong when he lifted his head, looking down into Kaito's glazed eyes.

There was a moment of _oh fuck_ before Kaito had grabbed him, mouth already latched onto the laceration to his arm, hunger in over-drive as Anesidora worked to repair her host. The draw of blood from Saguru and his injuries created a chain reaction, his own body working with what little energy it had to repair the damage done to his body...and with each pull of Kaito's mouth, each swallow of blood that the magician leeched from him, his body demanded more energy, _faster, now, dying_ to heal him...to keep his heart beating.

Saguru growled softly, his own teeth biting against Kaito's neck, thrusting their hips together, desperate, searching, needing release...pleasure... _fuel_. Kaito hissed, gurgling the sound out though the blood, unsure if he was trying to shove Saguru away or pull the detective closer, focused down on the blood dripping from Saguru's body, desperately hungry, animistic in his need.

They rutted together, twisting and turning, each trying to claim the other, to consume them. Awareness was coming back to Kaito faster, only having to heal one body instead of two. Arms reached down and suddenly he was jerked away from the pleasurable meal, metal sliding around his wrists as Nakamori shook him. There was a grunt...almost a scream and a police officer went flying off the balcony to his death. Thief and Inspector turned, watching Saguru struggle against the officers trying to pin him down.

"Mine!" Saguru cried out, biting at the hands that got too close to his mouth, desperate golden eyes locked on Kaito as he shifted, turning, twisting free of the press of bodies on his own. He reached out, snatching Kaito's ankle, pulling the thief down as he climbed up and over Kaito's body, kicking out at the men trying to drag him away. "Get away from me!" The scream tore at his throat, cracking as it broke free, every bit the sound of a desperate man.

Kaito grabbed Saguru's wrist, ignoring the blond's scream of pain as his fracture caused the bones to slide together. He wrapped another arm around Saguru's waist as they stood and drug the insane detective towards the edge of the balcony and over it, disappearing into the night.

They didn't make it far...not with the way Saguru was clawing at Kaito, nearly sending them plummeting to their deaths for the second time that night. It was rushed, hurried and brutal, pure violence in an effort to get a need sated. Kaito ended up needing more blood by the time it was over and the sated detective was only more then happy to provide considering he now had more then enough to spare.

They tumbled into Saguru's bed as dawn broke, still wearing their bloody clothes, Saguru's larger body curling around Kaito's, protecting him, saving him.

They had an hour, before the Task Force broke in the door, grabbing at Saguru, a flurry of metal cuffs and restraints and then the room was empty, silent. Kaito crouched precariously on the inch wide ledge outside the window, praying that they were too distracted, too desperate to get Saguru that they didn't look...didn't notice.

The door to Saguru's cell clanged open and an officer stood there, cap low on his forehead, wisps of brown hair shadowing his eyes. Saguru looked at him for a moment before offering his wrists, the too tight restraints digging into his flesh, offering very little to stop the swelling of his fractured one as opposed to simply cutting off the circulation.

The officer gave a smirk, a flash of elongated canine before crossing over to the teenager, un-buckling the thick leather, nimble fingers picking the lock of the handcuffs beneath. "So, I have this invitation to Paris by a...friend, and I thought I might have more fun with someone who has already been..."

"I'm not paying for the ghost," Saguru said in reply, standing. He brushed his finger against Kaito's lips, watching as a sharp tooth traced a faint line over his flesh. "Hungry?"

"Famished," Kaito said with a grin, drawing Saguru's thumb into his mouth.

Toichi floated his way a few feet away from them, whistling. "Don't mind me, I'll be over here...not watching you two make out in a secure block of a crowded jail..."

The door slammed shut behind him and the elder thief had to smile, keeping watch for his son. Maybe things hadn't gone so horribly wrong after all...


	26. Survival

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> How long can the boys go...without what they need? Someone has a bit of fun, trying to find out. (Follows "Passions").

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Bloody, gorey, violent and gross. Don't read while eating, watching telly, talking with friends or breathing.

**Survival**

" _Man can live about forty days without food, about three days without water, about eight minutes without air, but only for one second without hope" -Hal Lindsey_

"I wonder...how long you two could survive...without the other," he said, laughing as the door slammed shut.

They had been somewhere in China...or Hong Kong...hell it could had been Afghanistan for all Saguru could remember, when the darkness had claimed him. That had apparently been a week ago, according to the masked asshole who had just visited. The time in between had been filled with blood and pain and enough blows to the detective's head to make him question just what had happened in between now and New York.

He laid back on the cot beneath him, desperately squirming against his bonds as he tried to find a position that didn't hurt, staring at the gray ceiling above him. Somewhere, through the walls, he could hear Kaito scream.

…

They started removing pieces in the second week, a finger here, a foot there, some they left with him so he could spend hours staring at the piece of his body he had lost. Never anything he could use to hurt himself or insert into his self, but just a little something as a gift.

He spent four days with his appendix. He named it Samuel and had quite a few conversations with it.

They changed his restraints to metal after Kaito broke his own leather ones, and later wielded them to the floor instead of the bed when the vampire killed one of his guards with the bed. Saguru forced himself not to smile every time he heard the muttering of the masked man, desperately glad that Kaito was still alive...still fighting.

They took his eyes for the smile he had let slip.

…

It had taken four months, for the adrenaline to wear off, to stop healing him. There was a rush of fear, blasts of pain...and yet nothing changed. He was immortal...and he was dying. The masked man smiled as he bound Saguru's wounds, keeping him alive through the barest of means. Saguru wondered, in a faded manner, how Kaito was fairing...Anesidora kept him alive, but she needed blood, as much as Saguru needed the endorphins and dopamine to work. He hoped the vampire had died, had been freed.

He doubted it when the masked man came in holding a bleeding wrist and a syringe.

The cocaine injected into him did little, giving him a high and healing the most superficial of his wounds...his body was too damaged. It had made for interesting lights across the eternal darkness of his sight, and that made Saguru happy for the few hours it lasted before his body burned through the drug.

…

Kaito screamed as the red hot spike was driven through his thigh, right through the barely healed wound on his thigh where they had done the same trick the morning before. He panted, eyes wide, whites showing as he jerked against the metal table he was bound to. The torture turned away, placing the spike back on the fire and turning to his table of toys, consulting with the masked man over what to try next.

Kaito lowered his head, bangs hanging in his eyes, body convulsing as his empty stomach searched desperately for food...for blood. He vomited the breakfast they had given him, gagging at the taste of stomach acid that had joined. As his body jerked, another vomiting spasm taking him, he noticed something...different, then a moment before...the metal was weakened.

It was only on one side, one bond, the left forearm, but that weakness was enough to crack the restraint, free the lower half of Kaito's arm as he threw his body against it in another spasm, focusing his strength in that one section.

When the torture returned, a pair of bloodied pliers in his hand, Kaito's arm snapped up, grabbing the man's neck, squeezing down. The masked man acted, grabbing a pair of shears large enough...strong enough to remove Kaito's fingers, only to be send backwards by the torture's body as they ended up running into each other, one trying to get away, and one trying to move forward.

Kaito manipulated his body, twisting and squirming until he could get his entire arm free. It took him longer for his chest and by the time that bond was released the men were on him. Kaito strangled himself against his neck restraint as he lashed out, using the metal piece from his left forearm to slash the masked man's throat. The torture ran, but had been locked in the second the restraints broke, a back-up security that was proving a failure as Kaito slid from the last of his restraints, growling deep in his chest, pushing himself to his feet.

The man screamed, fighting off the thief, desperate. It was choked off, turning wet as Kaito's hands tore into his throat, teeth and blunted nails ripping flesh apart. Kaito drunk hungrily from the man, feasting even as his body consumed the blood it was given, Anesidora running in overdrive to fix it's host, to survive.

Kaito let out a frustrated scream as the man's heart stopped and the blood stopped flowing. He used his teeth to tear into the man's chest, fingers and hands tearing at bone and flesh before his brain started to kick in and he reached under the man's ribs, ripping out the still heart, biting into it, swallowing convulsively as he tried to catch every last drop he could.

He kicked the body aside, staring at the door that bared his way out, his way from more bodies...more blood. From Saguru.

…

The smell of blood, fecal matter and smoke was thick in the air as Kaito stumbled into the last room he had to look, crawling the last few feet to the bed. It was brown, the colour of old rust...and old blood. A decayed, rotten foot was facing him from under the bed, gone dyed orange with the colour of the fire behind him.

Kaito crawled onto the bed, curling up against the blond, ignoring the way his hand slid across the boy's chest, almost sinking into it. He gently brushed his finger over Saguru's cheek, skin stretching and sliding off with the movement of his thumb. "Found you," he whispered, patting Saguru's cheek and resting his head on the detective's chest, the smell of death and decay seeping into his nose.

Anesidora glinted at him from where he rested in his palm and Kaito turned his hand over, staring at the diamond. One of the guards had gotten lucky, a blast from a riffle to Kaito's stomach removing the diamond without any trouble.

Kaito could imagine, now, how Pandora had felt. Watching all that she loved die...everything that mattered gone. Kaito had lasted three years and he was already glad for death. He never had a chance, not when he knew...not when he had been told, seen that Saguru had died long before him.

Four months. Saguru had endured this hell for four months before his body gave out. Kaito had outlived him by six without ever knowing...

He was more then ready to go home. To return to the blond's side.

He turned, placing a gentle kiss on that was left of the detective's mouth before closing his eyes, waiting for death.


End file.
